I have an extremly challenging 4.5yr old, she will be 5 in september.
I believe she has ODD (oppositional defiant disorder), i have done so much research on this and am getting a referall to see a peadiatritian on friday..anyway

I had a little boy 5 weeks ago and now he is suffering her "attacks" about 30min ago I couldnt believe it I only walked out for 1 min to put the kettle on
come back and i sat down to talk to him (he in bouncer) and i could smell something so i asked her if she fed him and she said no,(she was eating a snack called noodle nuggets) then i seen crumbs on his growsuit and he poked out his tounge and there was food all over it, so i spent 10min scraping noodle nugget crumbs out of his mouth, then after id gotten them all he threw up what he had swallowed.
I asked her "are you trying to hurt your brother" she just shrugged her shoulders with a smug look on her face and walked to her room.
I have tried reasoning with her, talking to her, not yelling at her, yelling at her, i dunno what else to do short of smacking, which i hate.

i dont know what else to try.

DO u have or know anyone who has a child with ODD, or can u offer some advice?