Is it normal to feel this way?

[skybie]

I dont know if its depression or hormones or a normal reaction to everything, but i think i need to talk to someone, i dont know who though, maybe my GP?

Bub's diagnosis is taking me over, its all i can think about, im struggling to do the bare basics like washing and cooking, i cry all the time and im lashing out at ppl who dont deserve it.

I had my FB status after todays hosp app along the lines of feeling like a number and not feeling safe and comfortable with the hospital im birthing in. my mum saw it and had a go at me about putting the hospital down because they'd been so fantastic so far ect.
Yes the FDU department and the surgeons have been fantastic, that one meeting i had with them i did feel comfortable with all of them and every effort was made to make sure i was ok.
its my usual appointments i struggle with, i have to take the girls with me and today we waited 2 hours to be seen so needless to say the girls were rather feral by the time we were seen to, DD2 just cried the whole app and DD1 kept interupting, i was short tempered and over it, the OB i saw (different one every app) barely spoke a word of english i had to tell her about bub TOF and she didnt answer any of my questions in regards to what will happen once bub is born.
anywho, i fully lost it at mum, told her not to attack me when im feeling so fragile told her to go eff herself, hung up the phone and drowned in a pool of tears till DF came home from work and calmed me down.

i dont want to be pregnant anymore i want him out now, i want to move forward with everything and i feel like im stuck and just cant move past things.
i dont know what the point of this is...just a vent i guess
thanks for reading

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

hun... hope your ok.
Deep Breaths.. can you maybe explain to the hosp that you understand they are busy and you can't always see the same person but your feeling quite anxious about everything and you would like the chance to see the same person every time, explain you have to bring other children to the appts and is there any way around a 2hr wait

'm sure your mum understands and wont be angry at you...

[Ahurani]

Honey

Is there anyone you can call at the hospital? The midwife? Birth suite might be able to direct you to someone

I really dont know what to say, Im not going through what you are And your mum is being very insensitive

I will definately try and find that protocol on the intranet at work for you

MAJOR

[Maruschke]

Oh sweety totally understandable reaction.

[Bumperstump Cummerbund]

In a word = yes. Completely normal sweetie

You're grieving your normal pregnancy, you're grieving your idea of what it was all going to be like. Add to that the frustration of non-consistent care, well, it's a wonder you get anything done at all!

I recommend Kelle Hampton's blog to everyone, for everything. Not sure if you've read it, but in January this year, Kelle gave birth to her second daughter, Nella Cordelia. Only, Nella has Downs Syndrome, and Kelle and Brett didn't know beforehand. Her story, how she took one look at her new daughter and wanted to run from the room, and then how she slowly came around to 'that magical extra chromosome', is heart wrenching and raw. Read it if you haven't already, it's beautiful and I think it will help

[trishalishous]

Didnt want to read and not say

[human bean]

I didn't want to read and not post

huge hugs I wish I could do more

[UntoldAngel]

Oh sweetie it's a completely normal reaction, you're pregnant, caring for two children and trying to get answers for bub's condition and arrival with inconsistent care
I would be speaking to someone to see if you can get one ob to oversee your pregnancy given the circumstances
Vent away hun, we're here for you

[UntoldAngel]

Double post sorry hun... But double the hugs and thoughts