Help?!? my baby cries for 6-8hrs solid every day.. plus about 3..
My babe is now 3 weeks.. every afternoon or evening, its 6-8hrs of solid crying.. plus a good 3 hrs of solid crying in the mornings. I read in the child health nurse booklet that babies usually on average cry for 2hrs a day total..
He had reflux which has improved and I think pretty much gone since a trip to the cranial osteopath.. but now we are left with what I think is colic, despite the fact the midwives and child health nurses keep telling me this is normal baby behaviour..?? I dont believe that it could possibly be normal..
Am going back for another osteo appointment in the new year when the osteo is back at work..
He works himself into such a fit, arching his back, stiffening his legs, sweating, screaming his little lungs out and nothing I do settles him - EXCEPT if I let him be on my boob for up to 8hrs straight.. it is the only thing that calms him. I know he's getting plenty of milk as I can see it drip out his mouth when he's finished a feed or if I pull him off the boob, and he's put on double the amount of weight he's meant to in a week from all the constant feeding.
Im trying to limit his feeds to at least every 2 hrs as his tummy obviously gets quite full and it makes him uncomfortable but waiting the 2 hrs out is often quite a challenge. My husband keeps saying, 'just put him on your boob, he's going to have a heart attack!'
Other things we have tried to calm him, none of which has worked..
* Baths - usually works while he's in the bath but he's wide awake after.
* Driving the car around the block - settles for 15mins after the drive then wakes again.
* Baby swing - has settled him to sleep on two occasions
* Hammock - wont even let us put him in it.
* White noise (dryer, cd of rain noise, radio off station) - the dryer calms him down for about 10 mins.
* Dummy - might suck it for half an hour and then unsettled again.
* Rocking/bobbing him in my arms - might calm him for 10 mins
* Sitting in the rocking chair and rocking him
* Swaddling - he hates it at the moment as the weather is just too hot.
* Walking around with him
* Singing/talking - might calm him for 10 mins
* Patting his bottom - might calm him for 10 mins
* And all the obvious things like checking his nappy, his temperature, his clothing etc..
* Im also on a real bland diet avoiding all possible allergenic foods (as suggested by my naturopath).
Is there anything else I haven't thought of?? I dont know what I am going to do when my husband goes back to work as its physically draining and sometimes I feel like I am literally going to fall asleep holding him.. Ive taken to lying on my bed with him attached to me, so I can get some rest! But Im worried this is quite unsafe..
What to do... ?!?!
Last edited by tinkerbelle; December 26th, 2010 at 08:16 PM.
My DD had colic in the first few months and would do all the back arching and leg stiffening and have large crying fits. I used to do the bath and I would also lay her on her back on a towl on the bench and move her legs like she was riding a bike - this used to get up the wind and will also relieve any constipation that they may have as well. In the end we went to the GP and was put on Losec and she was a different baby after about 3 days - she only stayed on it for 3 months then had no issues.
We also used to use natural wind drops fefore her bottles (she was Formula fed) and that seemed to help with the wind pains that she used to get.
If you feel that its not normal for your bub then head off to the GP and see what they say.
Hope that helps and good luck.
Swaddle in the pram, then just push the pram back and forth? (I heard of a mum that designed a special bumpy mat for mums to push the prams back and forth!) NO NOISE!
You might need regular treatments of the osteo, I'm not sure that just one treatment works.
From one mumma to another, with a child that slept 6 hours out of 24 (!), rest when and where you can. If that means sleeping in bed next to him DO IT. I think you pushing out the feeds to 2 hours is an excellent idea, although it can be hard. We used to persist with the dummy and hold it in sometimes (nicely!) and he went for it in the end. We had about 500 dummies all over the house so we never lost them - from a mum that hated them
just quickly, my ds was like this also. sometimes it id normal
do you have a wrap/sling to keep him close? that helped us a lot. and taking him to b ed with you sounds like a great idea.
it will get better
Oh my goodness - you poor chickadee ... hang in there, it will improve one day, you will be able to sleep again, and your baby won't cry as much ...
This is mainly a in case more people can help out, but four suggestions:-
1. when bathing, DS loved the "floating" sensation - would relax him enormously, so I'd get in with hum, and hold him so his head and shoulders were supported, but he'd (from about 2 weeks old) would be keeping his body and legs us, and he'd get a nice relaxing floating sensation ... and then I'd turn him over every few minutes, so his tummy and chest would be warm under water, and he'd do this little dog paddling motion (keeping his head up again, of course) ... he loved it loads more than the baby bath, and we'd do a towel down and then a massage afterwards, and he'd sleep like bliss after.
2. with the dummy, I used to do a really quick tapping motion on it, which seemed to calm him down, but I've got no idea why ... but I wasn't complaining
3. a few friends' babies who cried big time and constantly wanted the boob found that their babies had "silent colic" which was solved within a week, with medication and a few techniques (keep upright for x long after feeds, cycling leggies, etc).
4. one friend whose baby had a 3-4 hour spell every (and I mean EVERY) night ended up going to sleep school (even though it wasn't strictly speaking a sleeping issue) and after a 3 day stay, the baby was in a great routine, and the crying (while still happened) was down to a 15 minute session, which while not ideal, was manageable ...
not sure if any of the above is of any assistance, but I hope you find a solution, hun.
That sounds like a total nightmare, you poor thing!
My DD was a bit like this when she was little, I just kept her on boob 24/7. She wouldn't scream, but was just always cranky and fussy.
In hindsight, I think she was just hungry and wanting to boost my supply, so I guess I did the right thing.
Are you sure your bub isn't genuinely hungry? You're right that sometimes it makes it worse, especially with reflux babies.
These first few weeks will go by so fast, and before you know it, this little phase will be over.
Good luck you poor darl, sounds really tough.
BAck without baby - google silent reflux, does he have other symptoms? The constant feeding can be a sign as it helps to soothe their bellies (although makes the reflux worse). Persisting with the dummy may help if it's reflux, as will keeping him uprigth as much as possible after feeds. Again, a wrap is also great as it holds them upright and brings them comfort from proximity to you.
Floating in a nice warm bath can also be good, as peanutter suggests.
We used infants friend ( from the chemist) and it was an absolute godsend. Get the medicine cup with the bottle teat on the end so bub can't choke.
I hope things improve soon, you must be a wreck, and it's so hard.
We had a long arsenic hour that started from around 3-4pm & lasted until around 7-8pm. In the end, the only thing that worked for that time of day was a sling and patting her bottom. It probably took DD about 10 mins to settle in it, but once she was settled, I could actually do things...like go to the toilet!
DD also had reflux, so both the cot and the pram (we had a bassinet style pram) had the mattress elevated at one end to keep her head above her feet. After feeds, I would read her a story before putting her down.
In the mornings, when she was due for a nap I would pop her in the pram and head for a long walk - to the supermarket, shopping centre, by the creek, wherever - that would last about 2 hours (home with about 1/2 hour until the next feed). The movement kept her sleeping, and sometimes she would stay asleep for an hour once we stopped. This only worked in the mornings, not in the afternoons!
Good Luck! Hope you quickly find a solution that works for your family!
Oh I feel your pain. We had one if these too! Although DD was only a screamer during the day, *mostly* she was a great night sleeper.
DD was finally diagnosed with silent reflux at 10ish weeks and put on Losec which was amazing. Within 48 hours we had a different baby!
The best things we did to get through the hard days was to wear her in a sling - she loved it and it meant we had some peace for a while. If I needed rest too, I'd just strap the sling to whoever was helping me out, lol
We also bought a Hushamock Hammock for her day time sleeps. Pricey but boy did it help! If you're keen on that idea, you can hire Amby Hammocks throughout Aus.
We also used Brauers Colic Relief (all natural) quite regularly until she started on the Losec and it did help a lot of the time.
We had a bassinet for our pram which DD hated a lot of the time so often walking didn't help. I put the normal seat back on (we have a three wheeler) with a wrap-around head support so she was upright and facing forward and 'hey presto' she became a huge fan of the pram
We also took DD to a baby/childrens Chiro which worked wonders. She was a vacuum delivery so her poor little neck was very stiff and sore - more pain for her! The Chiro worked on that and many other things including her silent reflux. They were brilliant.
If I think of anything else I'll pop back in. Big hugs though, it's so tough yet quite common but I can assure you it doesn't last forever
I had one of those too - and it was my second so it was totally unexpected. I feel your pain hun, it is the hardest thing to go through In my case it lasted about 3 months and eventually settled down. The thing that saved my life was a sling. With most babies just wearing them in a sling works, but I found with DS2 that I had to be walking with him in the sling for an hour or more until he eventually fell into a deep sleep. If I stopped walking too early he'd start crying again. It was still tiring but I dread to think what I would have done if I didn't have the sling.
The bath worked for us too - even if was only quiet while he was in it, the peace was so welcome. DS2 got a lot of baths!!
I think the thing is that this is a type of normal - not all babies are like this but some are. They do grow out of it thank goodness. I always suspected there was a food link but as it can take 8 weeks to get all the proteins out of your system it can take too long to find a link. Now DS2 has no allergies or intolerances so I guess it was just a temporary thing - or not related to diet at all I guess is another option.
I would also try some osteo/Chiro or Bowen on bubs as well. He could well have something out of whack from the birth, possibly even a broken/dislocated collar bone. It is certainly worth a shot if things are that bad for you
My little one got multiple baths a day too, cos it worked to settle her. Lots of bouncing, going for walks with her in the baby carrier, hammock, Infants friend... there are lots of suggestions above, you will find what works for you and bub. Sometimes things worked one day, not the next but would work again the day after. It was good to have things to try.
Not all babies do it, but many do. It helped me to think of all the other parents patting their babies and pacing while bub was unsettled. Made me feel less isolated. Secondly it does get better. It was around 10 - 12 weeks for my little one when i really noticed she was so much more settled.
If you are unsure about sleeping with bub at night, maybe try get some sleep during the day. Initially i felt safer if there was only bub and i in the bed cos i didn't have to worry about DH as well.
Hi everyone, thanks everyone for all your advice. Im pretty certain its reflux now (both some visible and some silent), so knowing this I am slowly finding some answers that work for us (sort of).
Im making sure he has a good full feed every 3hrs (both breasts with lots of breaks and burping in between and keeping him upright a lot, even letting him sleep upright on me for half and hour after feeds), and then filling in any other unsettled times where he wants the boob with a dummy in between. Its not ideal as they say to wait 6 weeks to give a dummy until breastfeeding is fully established. He's only 5 weeks, plus we lost the first week in hospital where I barely got any breastfeeding in, but I think all the overfeeding he's trying to do at the boob has just been making it all much worse. Ive also discovered the reflux is a lot worse when I eat some particular foods such as onions.. so its a bland boring diet for me!!
And its back to the osteo next week, am looking forward to that as I definitely saw an improvement after the last treatment.
Don't feel guilty about the dummy! I never used a dummy with DD1 so I'm not a dummy pimp BUT it was the only thing that would settle DD2 and (long story) she had no boob, bottles for six whole weeks plus a dummy and I got her back on to the boob without any confusion whatsoever when I relactated so please don't worry about it interfering with breastfeeding. You need to do what keeps you sane. Lots and lots of women use dummies and breastfeed without any problems.
DS was diagnosed with reflux at 4 weeks, on Zantac from 4 weeks (which we found did nothing) and then Losec (which was brilliant!!). Like the others have said, keeping upright, using the sling etc were very helpful.
Something I found also worked well was holding DS in my arms with his head on my shoulder and bouncing gently on a fitball. Apparently the up and down movements mimic the motion they feel in utero and we found he would pretty much calm down instantly when we did that. He also loved the shower, and a couple of times even fell asleep in there so worth a try!
It's definitely a tough gig having a baby with reflux but you WILL get through it and have your happy baby back. I can also HIGHLY recommend an osteo, they're so gentle and I found it made a huge different to DS in both his sleeping habits and the amount he vomited. DS has been going since he was 4 months, at first he went weekly and now he goes once a month. It took a few visits before we noticed a lasting difference but I definitely think it's worth persisting.
oh you poor darling! all the suggestions have been great, hang in there, and if you can get anyone to watch baby even for half an hour so you can get away from the screaming - DO IT! your sanity is important! something I found helped my little one too was massage, there are some specific massages that help babies with colic/reflux too.
Help?!? my baby cries for 6-8hrs solid every day.. plus about 3..
My babe is now 3 weeks.. every afternoon or evening, its 6-8hrs of solid crying.. plus a good 3 hrs of solid crying in the mornings. I read in the child health nurse booklet that babies usually on average cry for 2hrs a day total.. 
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in case more people can help out, but four suggestions:-
for you that things steadily improve, now 
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