I could have written your post, I have been in the exact same situation.

We co-sleep, fed him every time he woke as otherwise he would work himself up and wake up. DS woke every hour from 3-8 months and then about 6 times a night until about 16 months. I also wasn't willing to let him cry or switch to formula etc.

I know for us it was completely habit, he was always fed to sleep and didn't know how to self settle at all. He wouldn't sleep for a longer stint until he realised that he could actually get to sleep without feeding.

Eventually I admitted that he wasn't going to grow out of it and with another bub on the way I had to do something. I guess in the end it was some sort of 'contolled comforting', I refused to feed him at night and gave him lots of cuddles/singing/hugging instead. As much as I wanted to avoid any cry-it-out techniques, it wasn't that bad. However, DS was 16 months and even though he wasn't happy about it he was able to understand 'no yummies', whereas Jazz is still such a little bubba and just wouldn't know why you weren't giving her what she needs.

Basically I have no advice, I just wanted to let you know that there are others out there that have been/are still in the same situation. It will get better.