Sleeping alone at the start of the night?

[Fenella]

I've fallen into a habit of letting Tamsin sleep on my lap (or DH's lap) until I go to bed (we're co-sleeping). I enjoy it, but it would be nice to have some time alone with DH in the evenings too. I've tried putting her in bed (either ours or her cot) but she wakes every 20 minutes or so and takes 10 minutes or more of cuddles / BF each time to go back to sleep, which gets frustrating, so most of the time I just don't bother trying to get her to sleep alone. Should I try harder to get her used to sleeping alone for those 2-3 hours between her usual bedtime and mine? What sorts of things might help?

[Astrid]

Hi Fenalla, I understand your frustration. We do something similar at night, some nights Maggie will happily go in the cot for 3 hours and other nights she will wake every 40 minutes (normally half way through a show I was really enjoying). Other nights she will sleep really well if we keep her in the lounge with us, but we put her on a little mattress. So you could try giving a small mattress a go for a few weeks to see if she sleeps on that and then transition her to the bedroom.

I have also found that if I get her to sleep with certain music and put that music on in the bedroom as well, that sometimes she will sleep longer. Maybe something consistent like music, or a toy etc may help. Good luck!

The frustrating thing with Maggie is that she in not consistent, what she will do one week, will not happen the next. This week happens to be her wake frequently week.

[christy]

Maybe try laying with her and gradually moving away once she is asleep? I think its 10 minutes after they fall asleep they enter a deeper state of sleep and then after 40 minutes they "lighten" up. So maybe put a pillow where you have been laying so that there is something there. I think music is a great idea too. Matilda has music in her room playing constantly so that if there are different noises in the house, she at least has some constant. ykwim?

Good luck! At 9 months they definately become more aware of things around them, so if they go into a lighter stage of sleep it may wake them up knowing you aren't there.

[beckles]

fennella oscar sleeps on our laps too until we all go to bed, but recently we were given a cot and have put it in the lounge room where we watch telly and we put him in that, that way if he wakes up we are right next to him but we also have our hands free for hobbies we enjoy whilst watching telly. also i don't like leaving him on our bed because 1/ he may roll off and 2/ we can't get to him quick enough if he is upset. hope you find a solution which suits you guys, it's difficult i know but they need this for so little time. keep up the good work
beckles

[jbie]

beckles i think what you do may suit us...
do you find that bub's sleeping for the first few hours in light and noise (in the living room or with us awake in the bedroom) affects the sleeping patterns that bub develops for later?
ie will this make it hard for bub to learn to sleep through the night?

i've no idea of it all works, thanks for pointers =)

[beckles]

jbie i haven't found that it affects sleeping patterns later in a negative way, if anything my kids will sleep anywhere anytime. hope it works for you when the time is right.
beckles