TTC With A Shiftworker - Anyone Else Been There, Done That
OK, I'm 40 and am very lucky that everything seems to be in working order. I have become pregnant pretty easily three times (with one miscarriage at age 36, DD arriving when I was 38 and a miscarriage a few months ago).
I do realise that given my age, this is quite good going and I do feel a little silly posting this when it may seem very petty compared to what other people go through. Nevertheless, it does my head in a bit so I'm asking for advice.
The problem is that DP is a shiftworker and it is very difficult to get the timing right. One week out of two he doesn't get home until about midnight, then needs to wind down and doesn't get into bed till about 2-3am.
The other week, he goes to bed early because he has to wake up at about 4am.
If you've been in the same boat, how have you handled it?
My DH is on a rotating roster, which means one week he's home by 3pm, the next at 11pm, and one after at 7am!
I find it difficult because at times when we could be BD he needs to be catching up on sleep. But I did get eventually get a BFP (although ended in mc). I am just being really vigilant about taking temps and using opks so I know exactly when the right time strikes.
Fiona it's not silly. We are two shift workers on variable rosters - so no routine at all.
I charted for months and months...what worked in the end was just as often as we could manage. Sometimes I did just ahve to wait up....my preference was waking up ealy though
I am a shift worker (well was working a lot more till mat leave) and TTC was hard work as i would get home and not be able to go straight to bed as just home from work but DH would be like if u want to DTD you need to come to bed now as he had to get up early in morning!!! GRR was easier 2nd time round as i was not working again yet but even then i was keeping an eye on fertile times but not full on TTC IYKWIM.
I charted on FF for 12 months of TTC DS. Good luck, other thing is organise DH to have time off work for 2 weeks mid cycle!!!! That helped us as didnt phase me if i had to get up in morning for an early shift as long as i got DTD when neeeded!
Thanks guys - it's good to know that I'm not the only one in this situation and that other people have found the timing quite tricky too.
I've told DP that we need to get ourselves organised and diligently got out the thermometer, bought a special notepad that has graph paper and marked out the axes.
DP was crashing around at 5.30am this morning so I thought, "bugger it, it will take me ages to get back to sleep so might as well take my temperature" ... ONLY TO FIND THAT THE BLINKING BATTERY IN THE THERMOMETER HAD GONE.
My DH is a shift worker. I was too but am now on mat leave. He does 12 hour+ shifts of 2 days & then 2 nights. I was using an OPK to make sure we were DTD at the right time as I couldn't get my head around charting.
Well lo & behold I ovulated when he was on his night shifts!! Didn't bother me, I just woke him up earlier than usual. Lucky for me he's very easygoing.
Not the most romantic way to conceive a child. But hey, sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do!!
Good luck TTC.
DD was two years in the making, and I'm sure a lot of the problem was that DH works away for two weeks/home for two weeks so it was really hard to time things. He used to leave for work at 4am and there were times I knew I'd ovulate in a couple of days so I'd get him to wake me at 3am to get one in before he left! lol
In the end, we didn't conceive until our honeymoon when he had time off (obviously) and now we are faced with the same problem again so he has re-organised his roster to be home for the important time of the month.
So I guess my point is, the 'zombie-3am-totally disinterested-sex' didn't work for us, but the roster change did.
Wish you luck!
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TTC With A Shiftworker - Anyone Else Been There, Done That
Lucky for me he's very easygoing.
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