Mine do that. Kid you not. We start cleaning, I rope them in to help and DD says "Who's coming round today, mummy?" :redface::
I am so ashamed. Definitely suffer from CHAOS.
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Mine do that. Kid you not. We start cleaning, I rope them in to help and DD says "Who's coming round today, mummy?" :redface::
I am so ashamed. Definitely suffer from CHAOS.
Ahhh dd replied for me lol. I'd better read the thread but yes I think this is me and normally when its at is worst is when the outlaws come over:
We have a cleaner but she's not very good. Still its 1day a week where I can take dd out for afew hours and have the house tidied and cleaned without her destroying it behind me.
Where we live is SO dusty, you can't have carpet and after 3 days the dust is thick black fluff. If you leave it a week you feel like you haven't cleaned for a year!
Yesterday I through out 3 big bags if crap. We are trying to declutter.
Hubby hates mess and dirt but doesn't help!
I hear you on the, if your sick, have off days or lazy days, it all goes to hell.
My mum is ocd so its a nightmare when she comes to stay.
Sigh. I would love a spotless house. Wonder how they do it- minus the cleaner.
More often than not. If I have plans to have people over, I can do ok. But right now I have about 3 loads of folding, 4 loads of washing, half the washing up all waiting for me. I need to mop the floor that was mopped 3 days ago, tidy the kids rooms, scrub the food stuck to the table, clean the oven & under the lounges. And thats just inside!!
I love when my house is spotless, but I'm not very good at sticking to it. I much prefer to go visit than have people here. But here I feel safe that I know my kids can't hurt/distroy anything :lol:
I am always embarrassed about the state of my house. It's never as clean and tidy as I'd like it to be.
think about buying a couple of Enjo mitts for yourself, they really make cleaning a lot easier and totally chemical free. All I have is the bathroom mitt ($50) and a few microfibre scraps from the reject shop, plus I use a spray bottle of mixed detergent, vinegar and water for soap and grease scum. It has made life a bit easier.:
I have a cleaner once a fortnight now, she uses Enjo. She isn't perfect, I'm not sure any cleaner would live up to my standards but at least my house isn't falling to pieces and I can do the details on her week off. She's $30/hr which is a lot but it's 2 hours a fortnight for my sanity.
My girls have only just stopped saying that :lol: But they do still want to know why we have to clean it all the time! (I was much worse back when I was with ex. When life in general is hell, the last thing you care about is playing house..):
I'm not ashamed of the way the house looks. I just don't have the time to keep it showroom perfect all the time - and I think my kids will thank me when they are older that they were allowed to *live* in their home instead of being an accessory in it kwim? I know of people who freak out at their kids for messing the house up and drive themselves mental trying to keep it up to a certain standard but lifes too goddamned short IMO. Plus we have an old, old house (like nearly 80 years old) so anything modern like electricity and plumbing, hell even the kitchen, is all added on so the house is a random jumble of rooms. And because of that it always looks cluttered even if I've had a huge clean up. So I'd say it's messy, but not dirty.
Nope!
I'm quite proud of my inner domestic goddess today. My parents are arriving this afternoon so...
Last night she (my inner goddess) managed to prepare all ingredients for tonights dinner and bake cupcakes for my mum (it's her birthday)
This morning she tidied the house, plumped the pillows on the spare bed, iced the cupcakes, wrote on the birthday card, cooked up the chinese style pork (for tonight's fried rice), fed the toddler and managed to haul butt out of the house by 6.25am to go to work!
Well done domestic goddess - you have earned yourself a rather tall glass of wine when we get home from work!
Our house to a tee ;) We even have outdoor cladding in the hall way due to the way it has been added on to. Outdoor cladding indoors is just a dust catcher.:
Ashamed seems too strong a word. I am a teeny bit relieved that i'mnot the only one with a yelly voice in my head making mefeel like a failure.
I actually tidy up 'behind the photo' sometimes! i.e. i take a photo, or go to take a photo and quickly tidy the area up so that the photo looks like the show home that i always imagined i'd live in - but don't. Now i'm ashamed to admit that.
Oh yeah, anyone else notice that i'm actually a moderator for "The Domestic Goddess"? Perhaps if i surround myself in gold standards, some of it's bound to rub off!
I totally do the photo thing! So funny!:
A mum from our MG had us all over, a while back, and her front room was tidy but caked in dust. I felt SO much better about my entire life after that. And she is a friend forever.
So do it. Let's start a movement, a share-our-messy-homes advocacy group. Lives could be changed. For the better. You get to cull the judgmental types, and enshrine in gold the true friends who don't give a clock.
Sounds like a great idea Audax. Not ashamed of my messy home but I would sometimes like it to be better on my report card I would probably get an E for presentation and a D for effort am not fussed on the E but I think I could be putting in more effort occasionally.
Talking to older ladies closer in age to my mum and my mums generation there seems to have been less fuss in the past which had social and community benefits e.g. - impromptu visits and get togethers just popping in for a coffee/tea etc rather than having to arrange etc.
I know often people who have mums groups at houses talk about being up all night cleaning or them just getting cancelled because people haven't had time to clean up - is a shame.
I'll join the movement.
I remember when I was a child we would do impromptu drop ins and people would drop by impromptu and sometimes the house was a mess but it wasn't a big deal. Now we all want our homes to look like a TV ad.
Nope I grew up in a house that was cleaner than a tv ad :/
Yep same. Mum house is immaculate. But she never had 3 kids at once ;)
unmotivated day :(
I grew up in a pigsty. Hence I think the reason for me being a little house proud now, that and having a controlling ex that wanted things to be perfect.
I can handle untidy - just not messy or dirty. I'm known to have some kick arse BbQs on, with loads of kids trashing my house, the next day I have to clean it all back up to make it liveable. By the end of the week it's usually getting to the poit I'm pulling out by hair.
yep.. i try and try and try. I clean they trash it.. Its depressing..
the bedrooms are the worst. by the time I do the rest of the house I can't be bothered doing the bedrooms.. sigh and it all just starts again the next day anyways
I'm sure some of Mum's friends must have had spotless houses because the law of averages says so but I struggle remember who they were.
Mum had a cleaner and our house was still a mess. I think the cleaner spent as much time sitting on her but drinking coffee and nattering with Mum as she did cleaning lol.
I don't want my home to look like a tv ad. I want it to be not feral. :( But I can't be bothered cleaning when I know it will all be undone within minutes.
Well I'm grateful for this thread. My kitchen is now pristine lol.
I don't remember messy or clean houses. I just remember envying the kids who never had chores.
Can you make some zones B?
Have a couple of spaces that are clean?
I promise it gets easier when they get older.
maybe work out what really bothers you and just have them. eg.. if my kitchen is tidy (and not ness clean, but if the dirty dishes are near the dishwasher ready to be packed, or leftovers are all on one plate (for the dog) rather than on 3 plates etc..) then I'm happy. means I can easily not care about the rest. so if you work out like..if your toilet is sparkling then the rest doesnt matter, might make it easer for you.
I know it sounds crazy but clean toilets/bathrooms/kitchen are the easiest because when you feel overwhelmed go to a clean space and breathe. As onyx says it does get easier the older they get. And I find if I give myself timed jobs I get it done without feeling overwhelmed. For example 5 minutes in the toilet, 10 minutes on the dining room or whatever and just do a little each day. Tubs for stuff are great. I used to use tubs a lot when my kids were little coz then I could just grab everything of the kids and clear it into a tub.
I always do our bedroom first. It is the quickest and easiest to do. Also as it is what I wake up to, I find the state of it can drag me down, having it tidy motivates me. Oh on top of that, a nicely made king size bed is a good place to fold and sort washing ;)
I am finding as they get older, the cleaning is a bit better (I can get them to help), but that is offset by greater washing and cooking (and therefore washing up).
ETA: Messy https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...achmentid=3217
I have a few Enjo mitts. Been looking for someone who cleans with it. $30 I can justify. This was more than double that. Crazy! Will keep looking I reckon.:
When I take photos of the kids or whatever I try to stand so the camera is pointing in the less messiest place as possible.
My house is like a TV ad. You know, the one where the woman (so gender-oppressive) sits and cries before some housework fairy turns up and shows the woman some new product.
Yeah, the house is a mess. But we play, we don't die... so who cares? Plus Liebs helps pick up his toys at the end of the holidays (and every weekend is a holiday to Liebling) so it's not so bad.
And Rouge - I envied the children who had chores. The ones whose parents trusted them to clean properly rather than scream at them that they couldn't ever do it right. Now I know my house will never be "right" and cleaned to perfection, it's amazingly liberating. I do have to do the computer area next week though, it's starting to get to me.
I got screamed at too. And had "military style" room inspections. I've had dishes thrown at me that weren't dry enough and I've had every single piece of my clothing thrown on the lawn because I "stuffed" my folded clothes away in a draw instead of put away nicely. I've also been screamed at not to bleed on my mothers carpet (I got a blood nose after being shoved in my room for not cleaning it properly and hit my nose on some furniture). And yet after all that housework related psycho I still envy a stepford palace. I actually envy those with OCD. I am truly broken in the head when it comes to a clean house.
Fair enough, I wouldn't have envied you. I did envy friends who just did their chores without the mother hovering over them telling them how crap they were all the time, then never being allowed to do it again. Or watching it being re-done so I could see how to do it "properly" - which was incredibly OCD. Who needs all the carpet pile going in the same way in a room that's used by young people?
Thankfully my room was just used to tell the world and his wife how lazy I was that I wouldn't keep my room tidy enough. To combat that, I allow Liebling to have his things all over the house - having one small room to have all your things in is always going to look cluttered and messy.
I do let the boys scatter their stuff about a bit but I'm pretty strict with my no 'playing in my room' rule. They can come in for peaceful naps but toys are not allowed and rumpus' are very seldom allowed. It's my quiet space and I think it's fair to ask that they respect that since they have so much space in the rest of our home that they can mess up.
My chores were mainly outdoorsy - feed the hens and dogs, get in the milking cow, fetch the wood and kindling, pick the veges and so on. My only domestic chore was helping load the dishwasher and cleaning my room (under duress lol).
The funny thing? My kids love chores and DD's room is pretty neat all the time. DS is still learning but I think that's in his genes :p
Are you sure we didn't have the same mother?:
I used to be really embarrassed that every time my mum came over she would do a load of washing or clean the bathroom or vacuum as though she was saying "hey, this should really have been done by now" but then one day I broke down, it was after DD2 was born and said I feel like I can never stay on top of everything and mentioned how it made me feel when she always brought over cleaning supplies and 'helped out'. She was shocked! She said that I'm a brilliant mum who is focusing on the important parts, she just wants to make things easier.
Now I'm not too fussed and my house is always pretty clean, my mum visits a lot lol.
You have my sympathies Tinks. :hug::
and you have mine.
My house is a huge mess. When people pop round unannounced I stand in the doorway and talk to them. I live in fear of what a DOCs worker would have to say! But you know what? We have a tiny house and six people living here - four of them under the age of 7! And I LOATH housework at the best of times, let alone when I know it's just going to get messed again immediately. We simply dont have the space or the storage or the desire to stay on top of it. I figure I'll have plenty of time for a clean house when the kids have left home.
When I am having a bad day...
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I have a really small house now, and mess and dirt makes my head spin. It isn't always pristine, but I can't function if my floors are crunchy and there is dirty washing or dishes everywhere.
Most of my tidying gets done at night though, after the kids are in bed, so all visitors welcome after 7pm! :rofl:
I win.
Even if my 'house' IS tidy, people coming around have to contend with a composting loo...it's the 'weekender' type, so you can see the last deposits if the last depositor didn't sprinkle sugar cane mulch on it! It's a bit confronting for country and city people alike, because most people are used to flushing loos.
Add to this that we are still currently unplumbed and we have one tap with water coming through it - outside, along the wall, and it was only recently rejigged by DP to have a sink under it. I love my new 'mod con'!
We have great sinks in the kitchen and a gorgeous, very expensive tap (a freebie from a friend who scored it and never needed it in her home)...with buckets under the outlets that we empty after every dish wash.
Friends come over and flip the mixer and look very confused, till they remember the buckets!
Living in a partitioned and not-quite-finished cow shed is a great adventure for our kids and us, but I'm conscious that it's not exactly 'the dream' of a farm house people think of. However, visiting people are told it's a cowshed in progress and for that reason I never apologise for it. If we can LIVE in it full time, our few visitors, who have the heads up already, can just deal :p
Of course a child always vanishes into a closed room or my children throw themselves in front of a door and scream "you can't go in there. Mummy hasn't tidied since the dinosaurs were alive"
ONYX, you are so funny, thanks for the giggle!
i cannot have anyone over, know i need help but don't know how to get that help. The place is tiny and i don't know how to organise the rooms with furniture, so overwhelmed about what to keep, what to get rid of. Know i need to get "small house furniture" to suit this place, but unsure what to get. So many doorways - 3 in tiny loungeroom, unusable walls due to quirky place. E.g unsafe nonworking gas fire takes up one third of one wall. Have made small attempts, e.g got rid of long three seater sofa, replaced with smaller sofa. but that was a huge drama (the transport of it).
Due to my own allergies, i would like to be able to clean better too, so hard to clean when so much is on the floor. Electrical cord dangers and constantly tripping up, i know it's bad. I'm trying to make the small rooms do too much, like making my bedroom into sewing room, study, sleep area and clothing area. The room can't cope but i don't know what else to do.
i laugh about "keeping public areas", ALL my home is public area, it's so small. If you walk to the kitchen, you have already seen or are looking at entire place. So to invite a visitor in, i feel naked, they are seeing all of this, so shameful. I can't hide anything. Bilby wants to have playdates, apart from the fact of where we live making it not possible, i couldn't let school mums see where we live, and the kids and me and the mum would be in the same metreage the whole time anyway. Tried it once (kindy age), made me so anxious, the noise, the claustrophic feeling of four people in little space, two kids bouncing off the walls. i trip over things when it's just me at home, let alone more people in the mix.