Anyone else ashamed?

[Beautiful Disaster]

I know beautiful.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

My house will not poison anyone. If the washing up is up-to-date, the toys are tidy (and away, mostly) and paperwork isn't taking over the coffee table, bonus. I even dusted earlier in the week - but that was more to see the TV.

Beyond that - if you want to criticise, you're not my friend. Even my mother doesn't criticise any more, and has stopped doing "jobs" for me - if my house isn't good enough, she should leave rather than passive-agressively criticising my housework skills (which it is, btw, some people are like this, others are not).

Clean tablecloth means you were not only expected, you are also highly valued. And are not bringing children to make it even more of a mess than it was to start with.

I did do a big tidy yesterday ready for Liebling's friend to come for a playdate. But that's because children go all over the house and see everything. They currently have out all the hotwheels track, all the Brio, some Lego has already been put away but the Clicks blocks haven't... and they're taking turns on the DS to drive Lightning McQueen (telling me it's my turn to "play on the computer" - bless!). At least the treasure hunt stuff is tidied up. We will bake this afternoon before we go to the park - and tidy that away too, so I look like I'm on top of housework. And the vacuum can come out again tonight.

[~Raven~]

My house is a disaster. I have embraced the feral life but I still find myself apologising for some reason I cannot understand lol.

Even if I could vacuum without blowing a fuse, it wouldn't make much difference. I've got a family of 6 packed into a tiny house with barely any storage so it's only natural that there is stuff all over the floor.

Just the other day I had a brain snap and cleaned up in my bedroom and discovered all the stuff on the floor was acting as a draft excluder because there is a gap where floor meets wall that I was unaware of. Stuff was returned to the floor where it shall remain

[veus]

Thank god I'm not the only one. I tell everyone that my house looks like a bomb has hit it but they don't believe me until they see it and u can see that 'Aah u weren't kidding' look.

I got a cleaner quote thing done recently , their per hr rate is more than what I get paid. Given i want someone that uses natural/non-toxic stuff. But I can't justify it, so now I'm 'depressed' and the house is still a mess. Can't win!

[OceanPrincess]

i think my kids will say the same. i am working on decluttering but it is a work in progress.

Mine do that. Kid you not. We start cleaning, I rope them in to help and DD says "Who's coming round today, mummy?"

I am so ashamed. Definitely suffer from CHAOS.

[Butterfly Dawn]

Not ashamed as such, but this house does get more of a clean the night before someone comes over than it does any other time! I would just about die if someone popped in unannounced on most days.

Ahhh dd replied for me lol. I'd better read the thread but yes I think this is me and normally when its at is worst is when the outlaws come over

[Butterfly Dawn]

We have a cleaner but she's not very good. Still its 1day a week where I can take dd out for afew hours and have the house tidied and cleaned without her destroying it behind me.
Where we live is SO dusty, you can't have carpet and after 3 days the dust is thick black fluff. If you leave it a week you feel like you haven't cleaned for a year!
Yesterday I through out 3 big bags if crap. We are trying to declutter.
Hubby hates mess and dirt but doesn't help!

I hear you on the, if your sick, have off days or lazy days, it all goes to hell.
My mum is ocd so its a nightmare when she comes to stay.

Sigh. I would love a spotless house. Wonder how they do it- minus the cleaner.

[~clover~]

More often than not. If I have plans to have people over, I can do ok. But right now I have about 3 loads of folding, 4 loads of washing, half the washing up all waiting for me. I need to mop the floor that was mopped 3 days ago, tidy the kids rooms, scrub the food stuck to the table, clean the oven & under the lounges. And thats just inside!!

I love when my house is spotless, but I'm not very good at sticking to it. I much prefer to go visit than have people here. But here I feel safe that I know my kids can't hurt/distroy anything

[Tinks]

I am always embarrassed about the state of my house. It's never as clean and tidy as I'd like it to be.

[SunnyRain]

Thank god I'm not the only one. I tell everyone that my house looks like a bomb has hit it but they don't believe me until they see it and u can see that 'Aah u weren't kidding' look.

I got a cleaner quote thing done recently , their per hr rate is more than what I get paid. Given i want someone that uses natural/non-toxic stuff. But I can't justify it, so now I'm 'depressed' and the house is still a mess. Can't win!

think about buying a couple of Enjo mitts for yourself, they really make cleaning a lot easier and totally chemical free. All I have is the bathroom mitt ($50) and a few microfibre scraps from the reject shop, plus I use a spray bottle of mixed detergent, vinegar and water for soap and grease scum. It has made life a bit easier.

I have a cleaner once a fortnight now, she uses Enjo. She isn't perfect, I'm not sure any cleaner would live up to my standards but at least my house isn't falling to pieces and I can do the details on her week off. She's $30/hr which is a lot but it's 2 hours a fortnight for my sanity.

[~clover~]

ETA - when we were little, if we saw mum cleaning we'd ask: Who's coming round tonight?

My girls have only just stopped saying that But they do still want to know why we have to clean it all the time! (I was much worse back when I was with ex. When life in general is hell, the last thing you care about is playing house..)

[Trillian]

I'm not ashamed of the way the house looks. I just don't have the time to keep it showroom perfect all the time - and I think my kids will thank me when they are older that they were allowed to *live* in their home instead of being an accessory in it kwim? I know of people who freak out at their kids for messing the house up and drive themselves mental trying to keep it up to a certain standard but lifes too goddamned short IMO. Plus we have an old, old house (like nearly 80 years old) so anything modern like electricity and plumbing, hell even the kitchen, is all added on so the house is a random jumble of rooms. And because of that it always looks cluttered even if I've had a huge clean up. So I'd say it's messy, but not dirty.

[Cass72]

Nope!

I'm quite proud of my inner domestic goddess today. My parents are arriving this afternoon so...

Last night she (my inner goddess) managed to prepare all ingredients for tonights dinner and bake cupcakes for my mum (it's her birthday)

This morning she tidied the house, plumped the pillows on the spare bed, iced the cupcakes, wrote on the birthday card, cooked up the chinese style pork (for tonight's fried rice), fed the toddler and managed to haul butt out of the house by 6.25am to go to work!

Well done domestic goddess - you have earned yourself a rather tall glass of wine when we get home from work!

[Astrid]

Plus we have an old, old house (like nearly 80 years old) so anything modern like electricity and plumbing, hell even the kitchen, is all added on so the house is a random jumble of rooms. And because of that it always looks cluttered even if I've had a huge clean up. So I'd say it's messy, but not dirty.

Our house to a tee We even have outdoor cladding in the hall way due to the way it has been added on to. Outdoor cladding indoors is just a dust catcher.

[Lenny]

Ashamed seems too strong a word. I am a teeny bit relieved that i'mnot the only one with a yelly voice in my head making mefeel like a failure.

I actually tidy up 'behind the photo' sometimes! i.e. i take a photo, or go to take a photo and quickly tidy the area up so that the photo looks like the show home that i always imagined i'd live in - but don't. Now i'm ashamed to admit that.

Oh yeah, anyone else notice that i'm actually a moderator for "The Domestic Goddess"? Perhaps if i surround myself in gold standards, some of it's bound to rub off!

[luna moth]

Ashamed seems too strong a word. I am a teeny bit relieved that i'mnot the only one with a yelly voice in my head making mefeel like a failure.

I actually tidy up 'behind the photo' sometimes! i.e. i take a photo, or go to take a photo and quickly tidy the area up so that the photo looks like the show home that i always imagined i'd live in - but don't. Now i'm ashamed to admit that.

Oh yeah, anyone else notice that i'm actually a moderator for "The Domestic Goddess"? Perhaps if i surround myself in gold standards, some of it's bound to rub off!

I totally do the photo thing! So funny!

A mum from our MG had us all over, a while back, and her front room was tidy but caked in dust. I felt SO much better about my entire life after that. And she is a friend forever.

So do it. Let's start a movement, a share-our-messy-homes advocacy group. Lives could be changed. For the better. You get to cull the judgmental types, and enshrine in gold the true friends who don't give a clock.

[wysiwyg]

Sounds like a great idea Audax. Not ashamed of my messy home but I would sometimes like it to be better on my report card I would probably get an E for presentation and a D for effort am not fussed on the E but I think I could be putting in more effort occasionally.

Talking to older ladies closer in age to my mum and my mums generation there seems to have been less fuss in the past which had social and community benefits e.g. - impromptu visits and get togethers just popping in for a coffee/tea etc rather than having to arrange etc.

I know often people who have mums groups at houses talk about being up all night cleaning or them just getting cancelled because people haven't had time to clean up - is a shame.

[Phteven]

I'll join the movement.

I remember when I was a child we would do impromptu drop ins and people would drop by impromptu and sometimes the house was a mess but it wasn't a big deal. Now we all want our homes to look like a TV ad.