My DD was never easily settled by DP (he blames it on me being the one with the bbs! ) and even now at three she's never looking for Daddy when she's upset. Not even when she's in trouble with me! I used to give DP (and still do) other jobs that make him feel useful without needing bubs' cooperation. Bath was DP's job, now he's responsible for most of the meals and I send them out every weekend for a couple of hours alone. He could do more, but he's both a bit less sure than I and a bit more lazy.

And nappies can be either parent's job too!