I dont really know what I want from this thread, apart form just getting it out I guess...

Ok where to start... I have always been a thin person underweight most my life... Before Ds I was 48 kg and 165cm tall, a bit too thin I know ...

but now that I have had 3 children and I am now the dreaded 30 I am feeling really fat.. Its hard to know why, I know that I am in the healthy weight range, and everyone always says things like they would love to have my body, but I hate it... all I can see is my huge fat legs without any shape to them at all, and my tummy skin from having the kids, not that I can even really blame them as I when back to been thin ( 53 kgs ) after having each of them...

I am now 56.5kg, and I hate it... I hate everything about my body, I dont want anyone to see it, I make sure the lights are off when DTD as if they are on all I look at is how gross my body looks...

I wish I could be happy within myself, wish I could see what others could see...

I dont wish this for my girls I always tell them they are healthy, but other are always calling DD1 a skinny binny and string bean, which is what I have had all my life but also know that half my problem now, cant cope been a normal size, as too me I look fat...

like I said dont know what I really hope from starting this thread, I guess it would be nice to know that I am not alone out there, that other people too feel this way, and that there is a way to feel good about your self as you start to age and your body shape starts to change...

I have never seen myself as someone who is good looking, I dont even think I am pretty, I am just me, big nose, bad skin, shocking hair, me.... but feel now that I am ageing my life or my youth is long gone...