Homebirth General Discussion #15

Oh god cricket, don't say full term in two weeks - you are freaking me OUT!!! hahahaha!!!

I wrote a blog post last night on home birth, just needed to get it out and clear up some stuff that I know my friends and family are concerned about. I don't think I was too ranty - I was worried when I started writing it because I was getting a little worked up, but I don't think its too bad. Well, everyone who has read it says it is fine hahaha!!! (unless everyone is lying to me *shifty eyes*)

I read the kids Hello Baby when I was pregnant with Sahti, but I don't have a copy of it any more. Sad panda.

Arimeh - I'm two whole days ahead of you. You've got LOTS of time. ;)

Hahahaha well realistically I do since I go so far over lol

And I'm 2 days after you arimeh, even though midwife keeps saying I'm due on the 13th.

Wish I was further ahead haha!

Well must have misread the GTT reading as my results came back all good. Fasting it was 4.something and the hour after it was 7.something and last was 5something

Wish I was further ahead haha!

Well must have misread the GTT reading as my results came back all good. Fasting it was 4.something and the hour after it was 7.something and last was 5something

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Well must have misread the GTT reading as my results came back all good. Fasting it was 4.something and the hour after it was 7.something and last was 5something

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Those exact numbers? :p

I wrote a list yesterday with every single cleaning/furniture-moving job that needs doing before the baby arrives. We've got a loooong way to go :lol: Especially since I want pretty much the entire lounge room rearranged/cleared out :o

It seems like we've been running full force ever since school ended here (6 weeks ago). Non-stop busyness! I keep thinking that maybe tomorrow will be quieter, or next week will be less hectic, but they all seem to fill right in, and DH and I flop into bed exhausted at 11:30 or later, to get up at 6:20 and start all over again.... DD5 has been miserable and sick off and on (teeth coming in?), DS has taken to stripping himself naked and wetting his bed, we had four weeks of morning swimming lessons, we took two extra kids with us to the cottage for a week, the parent-run school that our kids attend needed to be deep-cleaned this week so we helped out there, (and DH's truck broke down on the way home at 10:30pm), we have two birthdays this week - one daughter turned 4 on the 7th, and one turns 10 today, and that added a lot of extra stuff as well. You get the idea - it's been crazy here!
However, my mom and dad are taking the four oldest girls to their house this coming week, just for fun, and DH's parents are taking them camping for a week after that, so I think we finally WILL actually get some quieter days with only two at home! I am really looking forward to that! Of course, DH is planning to use that time to paint the house and refinish the floors...
I washed all my baby boy clothes yesterday and got the little "dresser" I use for baby stuff ready to go. I think I have most of my birth supplies as well - just need to gather them up and organize them. :) Got to get the cradle bedding together and make the new mattress pad (the old one was well-used and had come to the end!) but we're starting to get things together here. Baby is often lying in a ROA position, and I'm trying to encourage him around to LOA, without getting too stressed about it. Also doing my best to be positive about the upcoming labour and birth. Mostly feeling pretty good about it, but there is the occasional moment of panic that hits. Looking forward to not being pregnant any more!

....hic....

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Looking forward to not being pregnant any more!

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For a little while ;)

I'm glad you have some quieter times coming up. So great to rest those last couple of weeks. Baby will be here so soon!! :D

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For a little while ;)

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Yeah, no kidding. ;) I think one more might be it for us. It will be a tough call either way.

One more Cricket?!!?!?!? Gee I really have to come to you for parenting advice, I can barely make it through each day with all the whinging and fighting from my 4! I'm getting more scared about the fact I have to parent this one than I am about getting it out!! I already have a lot of crap days and feel like I want to walk away sometimes so I'm petrified that this might be what breaks me. Which is why we were stopping at 4 kids anyway, I know my patience limits.....

Well you are all better than me because I'm most certainly stopping at 3!!! Haha I'm freaked out about the transition to 3... I only have two hands!!

I'm with you The Mrs, this is my last one.

had some bleeding yesterday, but it has stopped again. it took me by surprise because I haven't had any at all this pregnancy. I bled regularly with DD and DS pregnancies.

Dd told me she is taking DS and going to a friend's house to make a cake when this baby is being born. she is already bailing on us!

I am constantly astounded at how well so many of you parent. I desperately want another baby but we couldn't do it now and my babies were born in 2008 & 2010! When/if we have our 3rd that will be our last for sure. I think we will be able to manage another (once we've given our current two a little more time to grow) but anymore than that would max us out.

Heading off to cook a cake is a gorgeous idea. So funny she's not planning on sticking around though :lol:

Wow cricket, that sounds busy busy busy!!! A baby will hopefully give you a chance to shrink your world back down to a new little face while other people help out with the older kids. I'm glad your parents can help out so much. It must make a big difference.

HotI is all well now? A have only bled a tiny bit in dd's pg at about 33 weeks and it really scared me.

Meow, I think some people prefer parenting in stages, so all babies then all toddlers/preschoolers etc. I think parenting different age groups is just as challenging but for different reasons. I think I've left the gap between ds and this one too big but my body wasn't ready before now.

I'm trucking along ok. Still feeling weird about the lack of movement and I don't even feel pregnant right now, just tired. I'm having some generalized anxiety which sucks and I'm going to look into yoga and to really watch the grains/starches and caffeine in my diet (I had a tiny coffee yesterday and my heart was pounding for hours). Dd has been really sick with a high fever which is what set off my anxiety...I don't normally worry about that stuff, but she was boiling hot with a rash all over her and a puffy face. It was hard to watch. Anyway she seems brighter today. Dr dad saw her yesterday and is not sure what it is yet, but said to monitor her. Needless to say my sleep was pretty disturbed because I woke to her every move. Poor dd.

Our age gap hasn't really been by choice. In another life we would be having #3 any day now. Oh well!

I'm sorry things are tough at the moment and I hope it passes soon :hug:

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I already have a lot of crap days and feel like I want to walk away sometimes so I'm petrified that this might be what breaks me.

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Don't forget that you're in the last weeks of pregnancy, feeling tired and impatient at the best of times. It will get better after baby arrives and you get back on your feet again! :hug: Just give it a little time. There will be a few chaotic weeks of adjustment, and then it will be OK.

The Mrs - get a sling! I find my sling really helpful when I have to be out with the little guys. Then I have a baby on me, and two hands free for the next two, and the older ones can stick close on their own. :) They're easy to make too - I can PM you a link with instructions.

Also, I'm finding that there are some things that are easier about a bigger family. When I had only little ones, I was the only source of "entertainment". If we went to the park, I pushed the swings; if they wanted to make a fort or play pretend, I had to play along; if they went outside, I had to be there, etc. Now, my bigger girls are able and willing to give a hand with that. It is really a big help! I expect my kids to all pitch in with family life. I'm not their maid and I don't exist to entertain them. We've explained that families work together to get things done, and that help is expected from everyone. Teaching them to do their jobs well is challenging, but it is starting to pay off. I've also been blessed with a very supportive DH, and my MIL is close by and willing to help whenever I need it. My own mom and dad live a couple hours away, but as I said, they've got the older girls this week, and it's so quiet here today!
I think women sell themselves short a little when they say they CAN'T handle more children. Women have cared for way bigger families with way smaller resources (no washing machine, no running water, no grocery store, sewing their own clothes, milking their own cow, and baking their own bread) for centuries. You can do more than you think. You might choose not to have a bigger family, but don't think that you really can't handle a bigger family. Also, we are Christians, and I definitely believe that God gives you the strength you need to handle what he puts in your life. That has been my experience.
I had lousy days when I was the mother of one child, and didn't know how I'd cope with two. Then we had two, and there were some crappy days, but we adjusted, and carried on, and the same thing happened with #3. By the time we got to 4, the adjustment wasn't so big any more. The bigger ones could help more, and I had learned to work more efficiently. Now the thought of adding another child to the mix doesn't scare me too much. I know it will be busy, and there will be some frustrating days, but we will carry on, and it will be OK. Just keep that in mind when you're having a crappy day. It's just one day, and tomorrow will be different. :)

HotI - glad to hear that the bleeding has settled down again. That's always so scary!

Arcadia - hope you start feeling those little kicks soon! How many weeks are you now?

hi all :) Just subbing really. We are TTC number three, so another hb for us if that happens. :) wish me luck, I justb O'd today :) Swaying for a blue bundle

Welcome Bella! Hope the TWW passes quickly, and you can "officially" join us soon!

Thanks cricket :)

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Then I have a baby on me, and two hands free for the next two, and the older ones can stick close on their own.

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This is my problem. My DS1 is more than a one hand job. We're leaving a gap so that hopefully DS2 will be more independent at least so we can actually leave the house safely.

I hope it's a very quick TTC journey Bella. And I have fingers crossed for your swaying!!

Thanks meow :)

Thanks Cricket. My biggest issue is behaviour wise, my kids are pretty challenging and I have a short temper as does DH, so there is a lot of yelling in this house most days, which I absolutely HATE. My kids just seem to hate each other most days, and I'm probably really sensitive about all the fighting. I know kids fight but I hate hearing it, and the whinging afterwards, and they just seem to do it deliberately to make the other ones suffer. I grew up with an older sister who made my life hell most of the time and I didn't want that for my own children, but it seems they do it and it makes my heart ache that I can't stop it.

We are introducing the 10 second rule for myself and DH because we both have such bad tempers, we count to 10 now before we speak to the kids if they are doing something mean or something they aren't supposed to. At least that helps me get a pleasant tone in my voice instead of screaming like a banshee. But when they wake you up at 5am with their fighting over a stupid toy, and you've had a late night because of gall bladder issues or a toddler who wants to get up and play - its the absolute worst way to wake up in the morning and I just want them to leave me alone lol

Hugs arimeh... No advice, but I can understand why you would hate that.

Thanks Bella. I just realised my post had nothing to do with homebirthing so I can delete it if the mods feel its inappropriate.

I'll say something homebirthy now - um, I saw my cousin yesterday from tassie and she asked if I was having a homebirth and I was like yup! She seemed a little surprised but nothing negative was said, so at least one person is supportive!

Chiro on Wednesday to try and get baby in a better position for birthing since he can't come out my hip, and midwife appointment on Friday.

That's my sum up.

Oh pooh to not mentioning Hb in every post :). Lol! Surely we are allowed to all just talk as Hb mammas about life as well. Xx. Good luck with your chiro. Who are you using?

Embrace Life at North Lakes? Leasha recommended them to me, and I went to one in Caboolture before I was pregnant to work on some back issues and they were hopeless. At least Embrace Life do websters technique and they also have midwives in their centre. I actually contacted them about a homebirth when I was first researching it, but they were 5 grand for their homebirth, and Mary was a LOT cheaper so I went with her LOL

Good to see you back Bella29. You make beautiful kids, best wishes for a short ttc journey.

I really struggled the first 4 - 6 months with having 2 kids. I guess i am preparing for it to be rough, and then bonus if it is easier this time. DD will be at kinder, and DS is cruisier when she is not here, so it might be ok.

dh and i both come from families of 5 kids, but we are happy to stop at 3. Plenty of great things growing up in a big family.

Thanks hot1, that is very sweet of you to say. :). I think they are pretty sweet to. Tbh I am slightly more worried about the two-three transition. I didn't have a hard time with no two, mostly cos she practically slept for 18 hrs a day the first 12. Months. If not 18 then it was 20! Crazy kid used to have to be woken at 10 am just so I could do stuff. But dd1 was different so I am pretty sure I won't get that lucky again. And that will be tough.

Arimeh, what does Mary charge if you don't mind my asking? Always interested to know what the going rates are locally.

if i get a child that sleeps, i will have no idea what to do. Luckily my other 2 will keep me up to continue my 3 year no sleep campaign ;)

So far I have paid (and still have to pay):
$1275 for insurance and some other stuff - you get some back from medicare though (can't remember how much I got back, it wasn't much because I hadn't hit the threshold thingy)
$75 per appointment - I get about $68 back from medicare each appointment. I had an appointment at 11 weeks that they didn't charge me for, and then one at 15 weeks, 20 weeks, etc. I'm onto weekly appointments after my next one though, but I think they start coming to me. I will also get charged travel expenses because technically I'm not on the Sunshine Coast.
$2000 for the birth. Which obviously you pay after the birth. And you don't get any back from medicare.

Thanks arimeh. That's good to know.

For those on family sizings - I think once you have children who are a bit older they become a lot less labour intensive. While DD1 gives me attitude and some days I could do without her defiance, on the whole she's responsible and mature for her age. She also takes DD2 outside and the two of them play for ages without any input from me. She's very good with DD2 and while DD2 probably doesn't get her way quite as much with DD1, that's probably good for her! Plus, she adores her older sister and can't wait to go and play with her. With DD1, I was the playmate and constantly in demand. So while I don't have five for comparison, I can definitely vouch for the fact that it changes as they get older. Less tiring. And they can do chores and things, helping out is expected in our family too.

I was thrown by the close gap for these two and would never have chosen it. I still am mildly freaked about it, although mostly just avoiding thinking about it at all now. But DP and I are open to the possibility of a fourth, maybe, one day, depending on how things go this time around and with family life in general. Let's just say, we won't be taking permanent steps to prevent it happening (although I can promise you now that contraception will be an absolute priority until 2016!!). I really, really hope that despite the close gap, number three is a relatively easy transition. Like Arimeh, I'm less worried about getting them here and more worried about parenting afterwards!

Welcome Bella and GL with swaying! I suck at swaying and conceiving boys, so I'm only useful if you'd like to know what not to do. ;) Mind you, we only tried it when TTC DD2, so I'm no expert.

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Thanks Bella. I just realised my post had nothing to do with homebirthing so I can delete it if the mods feel its inappropriate.

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Tsk tsk tsk, what were you thinking not living and breathing HB every second ;) I can let it slide just this once :lol:

LOL thanks Lily Dust, I'll try to restrain myself next time ;)

I'll have 3 under 3...quietly freaking out! I want more too (crazy) but DH does not (he said he'd consider it if I didn't go crazy-PND). I don't have any family around and DH works long hours and 6days a week so I pretty much do most on my own and it's tough. Mind you I could give birth every other day if I was allowed.

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My kids just seem to hate each other most days, and I'm probably really sensitive about all the fighting. I know kids fight but I hate hearing it, and the whinging afterwards, and they just seem to do it deliberately to make the other ones suffer. I grew up with an older sister who made my life hell most of the time and I didn't want that for my own children, but it seems they do it and it makes my heart ache that I can't stop it.
But when they wake you up at 5am with their fighting over a stupid toy, and you've had a late night because of gall bladder issues or a toddler who wants to get up and play - its the absolute worst way to wake up in the morning and I just want them to leave me alone lol

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Awww, I'm so sorry to hear that your kids are giving you such a hard time right now. I really hope this is just a phase that they're going through and that soon things will be a little more peaceful. I really hate fighting and whining too. Makes the day miserable for everyone. I don't have any magic words, but you definitely have my sympathy - we've had days like that, and they stink. :hug:

Cricket I am actually a hand weaver :) I make handwoven baby wraps! I do love my baby wearing and it saves me!