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Hugs Freya. That can't be nice having all of that speculation. I don't know why people say unkind things, even tho I do understand the disappointment you might feel, I can't understand why other people are disappointed for themselves, they should only take their ques from how you feel about it, and if you are happy, they should be happy.
I really get what you mean Freya, I would struggle with what others said if we went for a fifth child, it's not just friends but strangers in the street, one guy laughed at me, my older girls were so confused about people and their attitudes, my eldest asked what is wrong with having so many children of the same gender, she felt like they were saying there was something wrong with girls!! A friend recently had her fifth boy, she didn't find out his gender before birth but she did have a big process around it. She went to some 'healer' type people and got to really delve into her feelings about it and at the end of the weekend (she was at a birth workshop) she really surrendered to him being a boy, it was quite beautiful to she her grieve about it and of course she absolutely loves him to bits now... and he is wearing a bit of pink that she had been saving each time she had a baby!!!! I hope you feel supported to talk about your feelings, feel free to PM or voice it here! xx:
Homebirth was less stress for my partner. Didn't have to worry about when to leave home, what if something happened on the way etc. No one telling him what he could or couldn't or should or shouldn't do. No need to be protector, bc the birth support people were ones we chose, people we were comfortable with. His jobs were more simple, and hands on - fill the birth pool etc and then chill with me until baby arrived.
After we avoided transfer with our unexpected freebirth my husband was the one who couldn't stop gushing about how good it was that we got to stay home. It obviously was a huge relief to him too to be snuggled up at home in bed with all of us together and well :)
Hello!! I'm new here :)
Long time reader of belly belly, but just decided to sign up as I have a few questions I'd love to chat about with like minded ladies :)
Hubby & I live in WA, and I am 36 weeks pregnant with our first baby. (Due date 8th December)
We are planning a homebirth on the CMP, and so far have been very happy with the program. For us the policies have been more of a safety net to know that we are low risk and safe, especially for hubby as homebirth was quite a big shift from previous thinking. He's completely on board now though, and gets quite fired up if someone suggests that it is "scary!"
Now in the final stages of making decisions & preparations. I noticed that sometime ago there was a discussion on the Vit K injection. Was in meow or bella researching that? Where did you get to? I've read all I can on it, and am only more confused than ever. What did you ladies decide to do with that one?
Hi ladies. You have been chatting. Putting my hand in the air and joining the support group for people's stupid comments! I kept my pregnancy quiet until 20weeks for this reason. Love my big family!
Welcome turtledove! I think I was involved in the vit k chat too. We don't do it. I'll see if I can find my research links for you.
So I just made a profit on my home birth. Loving the US insurance system! :lol:
turtledove- I did a lot of research on supplementing vitamin K. My general thinking is to supplement if baby has had any birth trauma (bruising, instrumental birth etc) and not to supplement otherwise.
But now I think our current diets and gut health may comprise our ability to have sufficient levels to pass on to baby. I aimed to boost my levels through diet. But then I had an unknown condition causing low platelets in pregnancy (something like 4% of women get this) so I decided to supplement baby with vit K. We decided on oral dosing (at birth, 3 days, 7 days and then weekly to 12 weeks) but if I had my time over I'd choose the preservative free vit K injection. The oral doses really upset my baby's gut- she was unsettled for about 12 hours after them and her poops turned green.
I found a good mix of info from the mommypotamus blog (bias towards diet to boost vit K) and evidenced based birth (bias towards injection).
Well done! You must live in a state that it is considered legal?:
Thanks for the info on the Vit K. It's a confusing one, because unlike immunisations, it sounds "natural." But after reading articles by mommypotomus, Chris Kresser, One Fit Mom, babyreference.com... it seems like it isn't that "natural" at all. It is a synthetic form of Vit K, the dosage is extremely high even for an adult, and there are other additives & preservatives.
Currently reading a book called "Well Adjusted Babies." I highly recommend it, it's a one-stop book for everything from pre-conception to toddlers, with a bias towards natural & alternative preventions etc. The author makes the comment "Saying that HDN is caused by Vit K deficiency is equivelent to saying that infection is caused by an antibiotic deficiency."
Dr Mercola gives a different perspective again, advocating the oral dosage.
I asked my midwife about alternatives. We can give it orally, but it is the same as the injection. She doesn't know of a natural or preservative free injection.
We decided to decline it, knowing that we can ask for it if the birth ends up being traumatic (which I aren't expecting!)
I guess I just wanted reasurance that other parents have declined it, and their babies have turned out fine! :)
Sorry to hijack the thread, by the way. Even though this is my first baby, I can still relate to the big family comments. I'm from a big family myself, and I can remember Mum not telling her mum she was expecting "again" until she was about 30 weeks, she was so dreading the comments. Now it's her turn to give them to me, "It's so hard to raise a big family these days, you should only have 2 or 3..."
I think HB is legal in most US states. The problem with it being covered by insurance though is similar to publicly funded homebirths in Australia... Suddenly everyone gets to have a small window opinion of what 'low risk' is. In this state MWs also face criminal charges if they continue care in a 'high risk' pregnancy or birth.
I don't think I'll really make a profit, I think the surplus over what I paid already will go to my MW.
I think that's a good plan for vit k. Pretty much the plan we always had. We enter up giving baby#1 the injection as he had a large bruised lump on his head at birth, baby #2 had nothing and baby #3 had oral drops given my low platelets.
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I guess the upside to this approach is that it does keep birth "safe" as we know that homebirth is a perfectly safe option for low risk women, and those that are high risk are safer with medical backup if necessary.
The problem seems to be where they set the parameters, and recognising that most women are indeed low risk.
Something else that would go a long way is educating women to be low risk. Proper nutrition, exercise, birth preparation. I noticed a vast difference between Australia and nz in this regard. Birth is an everyday natural process over there.
Many women are considered "high risk" by some, but are still safer birthing at home. The system needs to improve dramatically and begin to use evidence based medicine, with respect for autonomy (these are not mutually exclusive) before it is going to increase its safety.
I got the vitamin K for my DS because his birth was not great and he head prong things stuck on during labour, plus all the blood sugar monitoring after the birth etc so we just did it. I cannot even remember if I did the oral or injection. I wasn't going to but that was how the birth went and what I thought was best given how it all turned out.
My girls were home birthed and there was zero trauma and so I didn't do it.
Turtledove - I am in NZ and am very thankful to whoever it was that devised our midwife led pregnancy and birth system :)
Freya, the insensitive comments sure do keep on coming, most from strangers which is worse because who are they to comment on my life :rolleyes:. I am sorry people think it okay to say things like that to you.
I met with a midwife today. I need to chat with DH when he gets home but I know she is the one if we go ahead (99% sure it will). I had an appointment with another MW next week but just from phone conversations and email, she did not feel right so I just cancelled and she seemed a bit annoyed, I thought it best not to waste our time but her reaction made the choice valid.
I miss chatting about birthy stuff in here....
I had my first "what hospital are you birthing at?" question from a person at playgroup today (my first time attending). I had a moment of 'ugh here we go' then I said 'I have a private midwife and will be birthing at home'. She was pretty interested in asking questions like if the boys will be there and then we got to talking about water births. I felt a bit bad after ward that I automatically went into get-ready-to-defend mode but lets face it - negativity surrounding home birth is more common than open minds ;)
Ive looked into getting the placenta encapsulated and will be booking that in soon. Ive been very up and down emotionally lately, its been a rough year, so Im hoping it will help keep things calm and steady after bub arrives.
Ive got a few more baby things organised (like laybying the carseat) but otherwise there really isnt a lot to do until Im hitting my due date. I am going to start a 'Positivity Wall' in my birth space, not entirely birth related but just positivity in general to try and keep my mood up and thoughts happy for the next 14 or so weeks.
Speaking of organising birth spaces; when do you start getting organised for the birth - from 37wks? earlier? leave it til the last minute? What exactly do I need to do that my midwife wont?
Yes, birth space prep! I've been wanting to ask that question! What does "birth space" mean to you, how do you prepare, practical and aesthetical things, and what is your timeline?
I thought of starting a new thread for that question, as I am sure other ladies planning homebirths in the future will be interested too, rather than have the topic lost in a big thread like this :)
Freya, oh, I dread that question too. Especially after the initial reaction from my in-laws. It was only this past weekend that we told the uncle, and he lives over our back fence, so will possibly hear me if I get vocal in labour! He took it well enough, tho I think he would have liked to have been told earlier.
Artechim, there's a lot to love about NZ! I lived in there for 12 months, and would happily do so again!
Thanks ladies for your input on vit k. Very helpful :)
Not much happening here!
I started another thread on the topic of birth space prep to answer my questions... And hopefully Freya's as well :)
https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...ration-198764/
Sorry turtledove! For me cos it was in my bedroom, it was a late prep thing. I will see if I can find you a few pics.
Ok, so somewhat rude photo, but it is a shot of the lights and pool behind me. I think they told me a rude joke.
Here is another. Put them all together and I guess you can see the space a bit more.
Just rambling here. I made up my birth space to look pretty to the eye, with fairy lights, and then added in things like birth flags as special momentos. I also used the babies dresser drawers to hold pictures and canvases that women sent me that were lovely Nd special to me, and a small prayer space for my hopes and dreams to be written etc.
It's not letting me view the pics :( maybe I don't have enough posts?
Would love to see the fairy lights, flags, etc!
Oh, I have no idea why it is being so crap! Hmmm.... Hang on, if you would like to see my birth video, you will see it. Go google d ocumenting d elight, ed dies birth video YouTube. You will see me and my two little ginger sweeties ;). And our birth space of course. There are pictures if you go to dd's blog and read my story that I put there. No idea why the pictures didn't work. I'll try again tho.
I can see your pictures here, Bella. I think you need to have 100 posts before you can see posted pics?
That's a bit dumb. I'm definitely not going to make it to 100 posts before this bub arrives! I can understand why they do it tho.
We set up the pool last night. I didn't really want to, I'm still in denial! But hubby was keen, he said it will help me feel more in the mindset.
It's in our lounge/family room, which isn't the calmest room of the house, but it is the most practical. Near the kitchen taps, door for draining, and it's not on carpet. It would have been nice if we could have used our bedroom tho, it's much more intimate. Any tips to help make it more personal?
Hubby must have been right about getting in the mind space. Been having regular tightenings since 3:30am. Still in denial tho, and just a little bit nervous! Can I get a hug? :)
My birth pool was in the kitchen! I had window behind me with curtain closed. I had fairy lights along top of curtain. I strung another elastic cord across the room and hung a funky celtic design sheet off it. I also had some beautiful bunting that some friends made, with gorgeous sayings or encouragement written on them. I typed out some phrases i liked and printed them on card and had them hanging off the curtain. These weren't obvious when the curtain was open.
on the night, we moved the kitchen table out and set the pool up. closed the curtain, and spread out the celtic sheet and it created a cozy space.
wishing you a gorgeous birth.
Turtledove :hug:
After blackouts with the stoms last week, going away for a week and coming home to more blackouts Mon & Tues. I finally emailed the midwife I met with to say I want to go ahead with her :)
wahoo Kazzo! i love knowing that moment you lock in your team :D
Turtledove: hi! and sending you many birth blessings xx
Those cramps did progress... very quickly! Our bubby is here! Born 10:20pm on Tuesday 2nd December, in the water, in the caul, at home. A little man. He's perfect, and I've fallen in love all over again :)
Thanks for all the encouragement ladies. I'll be back soon to chat more birth stuff, but for now enjoying these lovely newborn snuggly cheeks!
Congratulations turtledove! Lovely news! Xoxo
:baby: Babies Arrived :nappy:
-2012-
Jennifer13- Baby GIRL born at home 4th January 2012
Bella29- Baby GIRL born at home 10th January 2012
HotI - Baby BOY born at home 21st January 2012
*Ash*- Baby BOY born at home 14th February 2012
loulabelle - Baby BOY born at home 24th February 2012
Cricket - Baby GIRL born at home 15th May 2012
chocorama - May 2012
...Em - Baby BOY born at home 7th June 2012
BellyBelly - Baby GIRL born 11th August 2012
Tanya - Baby BOY born at home 16th August 2012
phynna - Baby GIRL born at home 8th September 2012
lady_neon - Baby BOY born 27th September 2012
Ambersky - Baby BOY born at home 3rd October 2012
Cassius - Baby GIRL born at home 4th November 2012
Ice cream - September 2012
mirriumu - November 2012
Pumpkinzulu - Baby GIRL born at home 12th December 2012
- 2013 -
Sara - Baby BOY born 18th January 2013
turtlejane - Baby GIRL born at home 31st January 2013
Bellany - Baby BOYS born 14th March 2013
Ree*Ree - Baby BOY born 18th March 2013
Aimz - Baby BOY born at home 21st March 2013
Beatrix - Baby GIRL born at home 7th April 2013
Rubyshoes - Baby BOY born at home April 2013
Dollyroux - Baby BOY and GIRL born 29th April 2013
HomeStyleMumma - Baby GIRL born 8th May 2013
ladybirdflies - Baby GIRL born at home 23rd May 2013
Cricket - Baby BOY born at home 26th August 2013
Sepata - Baby BOY born at home 31st August 2013
WilliamsMummy -Baby BOY born at home 17th September 2013
Loulabelle - Baby BOY born at home 17th September 2013
Sunnylove - Baby GIRL born at home 2nd November 2013
DotFace - Baby BOY born at home 9th November 2013
Eenee - Baby BOY born at home 22nd November 2013
TeniBear - Baby GIRL born at home 21st December 2013
*The_Mrs.* - Baby GIRL born at home 31st December 2013
-2014-
Jennifer13 - Baby GIRL born at home 1st January 2014
Arcadia - Baby BOY born at home 30th January 2014
Special - Baby BOY born at home 6th February 2014
HotI - Baby GIRL born at home 23rd February 2014
Smoke Jaguar - Baby GIRL born at home 18th March 2014
Bella29 - Baby BOY born at home 13th May 2014
Ozstar - Baby GIRL born at home 20th May 2014
Sterla - Baby GIRL born at home 30th July 2014
Meow - Baby GIRL born at home 26th August 2014
Ladybug - Baby GIRL born at home 2nd September 2014
phyrephly - Baby BOY born at home 10th September 2014
e_p - Baby GIRL born at home 11th September 2014
kellbell - Baby GIRL born at home 19th September 2014
Tegam- Baby BOY born at home 24th September 2014
Turtledove - Baby BOY born at home 2nd December 2014
:pregnant: Babies On Their Way :bellyrubs:
Ilithyia - January 2015
Freya - March
Dani - April
Kazzo - May
Boomba - June
:happydance: Congratulations Turtledove. A lucky little man. Enjoy your squishy hugs.
Congrats Turtledove, and welcome to your little lad! Cant wait to hear all about it when you are up to it!!!
So that's it for babies for 2014 by the look of it. You are up next Ilithyia then its me!
Huge congrats Turtledove!! Enjoy your newborn squish!
Congratulations Turtledove! Wonderful news <3
Enjoy those squishy newborn snuggles!
Congrats turtledove! Well done mamma. Lots of babies born in the caul in homebirths I notice. My second was. :). Enjoy your baby moon.
Oh massive congratulations Turtledove! and in the caul!! how special!
Hi all, I had my first appointment with my MW last week. I love her and the kids do, they keep asking when she will be back. DS did the cutest thing. MW gave us a book to borrow to read to the kids, so DS went and got our coffee table book, which is a book of photographs of babies and children from around the world and gave it to our MW :heartbeat:
That is so cute kazzo! Ahh enjoy this time. It is such a lovely time in a woman's life.