Homebirth General Discussion #22

Thank you so much for reading Tegam. I have really appreciated your support and caring through my whole journey xx It really was a spectacular birth and the crazy thing is you can't plan the unplanned so I could never have planned for it to surprise me in it's awesomeness like that... but I wish I had known and not have had to go through the damn rollercoaster ride my pregnancy turned out to be!

Congratulations Boomba!!

Freya, I didn't have the energy to reply to the posts in the FB group but I think there was a little too much focus on the CMP and publicly funded homebirths letting women down. I guess, honestly, they do risk women out more often than an IM would but I think the homebirth scene has become very risk adverse with the witch hunt that goes on. So I think you're seeing more and more IMs risk women out of their care for more minor reasons too. I don't think it hurts to talk to your CMP MW and get her honest opinion on the program. And it doesn't hurt to talk to some IMs and get a conversation going there too. I changed MWs at 30 weeks so it's not too late if that's what you decide to do.

Oh Meow! what a beautiful birth story!! Thanks so much for sharing it! How wonderful!!

Tegam: how much are IMs out your way?? many over here at not so expensive...and if you can time it until a bit later then the costs can go down too...

Im making an appointment to sit down and discuss options with the My Midwives branch here in Perth. They are medicare eligible and Ive discovered our health fund also allows some rebate for ante/post natal and birth costs for private midwifery. If I can utilise those things to get the costs down to manageable I think DH may be persuaded to let me go the IM route. I still dont feel entirely comfortable with the whole hospital program thing so yeah, cant hurt to look in to other things.

Either way I had my 20wk scan today, baby is looking great! Placenta is well out of way of my cervix, bub is measuring above 65th percentile which means no small-for-dates/IUGR concerns. Everything was where it should be and doing what it should be. So now we grow and wait!

Bella my Mw cam to my appointment at home and was all relaxed saying yay yeah all normal, nothing will be a problem, you have until 42weeks before the hospital will require monitoring! Then a few hours later I get a text saying "oh actually now I can't be certain your baby isn't breech, you have you'll have a scan" the text came out of no where but after everything I went through with dd3, my two big triggers were scans and internals. My DH called her as I was a mess and said "what's going on". He got off the phone and not an hour later she and her back up midwife are at my front door! Un invited! The back up Mw wanted to feel babies position. She had a feel and said she was 90% sure the baby was head down but she wanted a scan or to do an internal. I said no and asked that they not ask me again. I was feeling bub kick high, I was getting hickups down low and she, my Mw and my mum (a midwife) all thought the head was down! I said that I needed to know that this was agreed and they were not going to move the goal posts on me again. They promised that it was no issue and left. Next morning I get a phone call from the back up Mw, my Mw is sick so she is now my primary and she and her backup had talked and they were not happy to continue care if I didn't have the scan. I said "you are telling me that if I don't do this you are withdrawing care" she said yes, I am withdrawing care as of now until you have a scan or internal. Now of you knew dd3's story you would understand why I was so upset. And these MWs knew my history. But yelp I was left with a decision. She said it was about building a trusting relationship and I had to placate her concerns, nothing was said about me, my feelings, my trust :(

The language they used was just like being at an OBs appointment. So sad that our private MWs are so worried about legality that they didn't once look at the women. All for a 10% chance that the baby might be breech.

Long story short I have the stupid scan, I allowed the lovely man at a private place to stick the probe on my belly for 2secomds, we saw head and bam the probe was off, I refused to go to a hospital to have the scan.

Then I was left with the decision to call these women when I went into labour. Anyone surprise we free birthed??? All this when I was overdue!

Thank goodness my DH is so amazing and that ds2 allowed me to have a beautiful, natural, loving birth with just my husband there to catch! The kids then ran in and it was about our family not the MWs.



Freya: I think that sometimes forums and Facebook groups attract people that want/need to be heard. And yes it can become a bit of a "my story is worse" I understand that's ironic seeing I've just written a poor me post, go figure the logic of that one. But what I'm saying is take it all with a pinch of salt. Talk to your mw and yes do some research to see your options, sadly the MWs I was talking about above were from a "my midwives" practise.

Yay on the scan, glad your little one is swimming about in perfection :) half ish way! Time will fly!

Cass: the whole thing cost between $3000-$4000 I haven't added it up and we got some money back on Medicare. I still got charged the full amount even though she didn't get called until after bubs came! Wish I'd at least birthed in the middle of the night so I'd called her out of bed, but no it was middle of the day, such a polite time to come on over!


Meow: I love your "you can't plan the unplanned"

Sorry for my epic post

Still so mad and shocked at your MWs Tegam. It just defies logic!

Great news on your scan Freya! I hope the appointment goes well.

Thanks for reading Cassius :)

Tegam that sounds horrible :( so sorry you had to experience that. I actually usually feel fairly iffy about freebirth but I can see why you went that route in the end and don't blame you one bit. Might have done the same in your position except called an ambulance instead of those midwives. *hugs*

Meow thanks for sharing your edited version here, so nice that you got your homebirth in the end! But sucks that you had such a stressful pregnancy. Glad you didn't bleed too much at birth :).

Welcome to the group boomba :)

Freya I went through the public home birth program here in Melbourne which I think is similar to the cmp. I loved my midwives and enjoyed the care during pregnancy and post partum, but during the actual birth I ended up having to transfer as baby was posterior and just kept getting stuck behind a bit of lip which I think was starting to swell too. So I did enjoy my experience but I think if we can afford it next time we'll go the IM route or at least have an awesome doula if I choose to go public homebirth route again so that someone can stand up for me during labour as dh and I are both ninnies in that regard.

ETA: just to clarify, I enjoyed my pregnancy and post partum care, the birth itself I've only recently come to terms with. :)

Oh Tegam I had no idea that's horrible . You are amazingly strong
I don't know if I could have called them after being treated like that :-/
It makes me so angry for you . How can women be treated like that I just don't get it

We had an independent midwife payed 5000 but got some of that back through Medicare. I told her shes worth a million dollars . It was an up and down journey but in the end she really came through for us .

Is it true there is no public funded home birth program in Qld ?

Oh Tegam! You didn't say! I had no idea. I'm so sorry honey. I'm glad it was ok in the end and that his birth was just about you. But I am sorry they treated you like that. That just isn't ok. My mw was happy and confident enough to have a feel and we trusted each other that my baby was head down. If they arnt confident of their palpating skills, what the hell are they doing practicing independently. All women don't need a scan at 40 weeks to check babies position. What a load of rot! So sorry love.

Kellbell, we have no publically funded programs here. And I for one am not devastated by it. Only because I don't want publically funded ones to push independant midwives out of practice. When we have public ones, they can call them the 'safe ones'. The ones that have all the restrictions that don't allow mothers autonomous choice will be considered the only safe ones and then it will be thought that only eligible Mw's who work in a system that doesn't support choice are able to safely practice independently. Then the insurance issues will be brought to the fore. They will cover the publically funded homebirths and so they will tell us we have options, even tho most of the women on this thread would be risked out of a public hb program, or like me, never let in in the first place, but they will point and say, "look, there are choices here". Even tho they will never allow me access to those choices and they will stop my preferred carers from caring for me on pain of fines..... I can see where it is headed, and Mark my words, until we enshrine a woman's right to chose in our culture and our midwives duty of care to their women, regardless of those choices, then we are going to loose our best and brightest and we will make collateral damage of any woman who is too fat or too old, who has had too many babies or by the 'wrong route', or who had an elevated bsl once...... Sighhhhhh...... Sorry for the rant. I'm not against the hospital funded programs as such, just of where they are leading us...

Tegam: :hug: glad the birth made up for it.

Meow: thanks for sharing your story just lovely


The whole midwives thing is rather frustrating and I see as only to get worse with the looming cut off. But annoying how MW aren't happy doing what they may have previously been happy to do at home all because of legalities.

Just a quick post I can never reply properly or write properly when I'm tired and I'm always tired!

I'm the same eenee, don't worry. We are all mothers we all understand.

Hi all.

I thought I would come here and say hi. After three good hospital births I really really want to have a homebirth this time. My biggest problem will be convincing DH about the price. I know he will say going to the hospital is free but to me it is so much more then that but he will struggle understanding that I think. I must admit I have been a bit suprised by the price myself. I had an idea but so far it has all been a bit above that.

I am still waiting on a few replies from MW that are closer to me though.

Luckily DH is overseas until Nov so I have time to look into it and get info and prepare everything for when he gets back.

Hi All,

Just popping in for a quick hi! Congrats and welcome Boomba!

Tegam - WOW! That is shocking behaviour from your MW's! What a drama for you!

I'm pottering along. 26 weeks today. Struggling with fatigue :( Otherwise well!

Everything is on par for our birth at home and I'm so excited!

Sorry for the brief post! I will try and get in more often!

Hope you're all well xx

P.S I've attached my 25 weeks belly shot :) 4006

Sara, is that the photo you meant to put up?

I don't even know where that pic came from :-/ lol

Just fixed it!

I just wanted to say a huge HeLLO and warm welcome to KAZZO!!! I will reply your post later, just doing a flyby at the moment xx

Kazzo some midwives offer a payment plan and are quite flexible in how long it takes to pay them back, so maybe you can raise that with midwives you interview to find one that suits?

Yes welcome Kazzo! Sorry I didn't welcome you before. I am half brain dead most days. 'This too will pass, this too will pass, this too will pass'. Lol, ahh. But the gorgeous baby giggles in the morning make it all worth it.

Yay kazzo and welcome. Hope you have a wonderful pregnancy and I can't wait to hear all about your Homebirth plans.

Lovely photo sara

Been quiet in here. Are we not waiting on any more babies?

Ive decided to make the move to a private midwife and home birth. I just havent felt comfortable with the CMP rules and attitudes; and figured ignoring it would only hurt me in the long run. I feel better already!

Glad you are feeling happier with that Freya. Tbh, there is nothing quite like having an IM, who only makes recommendations based on you and your babies health, rather than policies and protocols.

We are good here. Eddie doesn't have a cold anymore, and is happy. Yippee! His pain is way better with the losec and he is ready to get moving! He has started to rock up onto his knees. He won't be still for much longer I don't think. He loves the jolly jumper, and can spend an easy hour in there just bouncing like crazy. He just loves to be upright.

Tegam, how's your gorgeous little man going? Ladybug? How you doing? Meow? How are you settling in? I wanna hear about the babies.

Freya that's great news! I'm super happy for you. This is going to be a wonderful birth :D

Such great news from you too Bella. I'm so glad you seem be turning a corner there. Phew!

Busy and tired here ;)

Thank you all for the welcome.

Thanks for the tip Dotface, it will be a question to add to my list. Have not made anymore plans, waiting until DH gets home next week.

Do you still have to check in to a hospital if your having a home birth? If you do I wont be contacting them until I am past 15wks then. After my last pregnancy and their protocol changes I would rather skip the early runaround they like to do now.

Freya: that's wonderful news! I saw something like this on the Facebook thread and hoped it was you!

Meow: why you so tired lol!!

Bella: yay on movement, he will be so much happier once he can get around! Glad the illness has left your house too!

Afm: oh little man is 5weeks old tomorrow, crazy I know. Oh I love him so much, such a precious time and so nice that being the 5th i truly know to enjoy every last minute. He love to be cuddled so the HAB and mei tai get a work out. We are going to Sydney next weekend so I even brought myself a manduca :) both my older girls miss 10 and 8 got QLD champion in Physie so off to Sydney for the national competition! With a 6week old.... Crazy and expensive but we'll survive. the other kids adore the little guy. Only down side is he has a lip tie we will have to see too. My nipples are so sore and feeding isn't always that fun, again lucky he isn't my first. Anyone had a lip tie baby? We have done tongue ties here but never a lip. I'm terrified as they say it can be hell.... Feeling guilty but everything points to doing it early. Seems odd that I choose Homebirth, no needles ect to the laser a lip tie.... But breast feeding is important too..... Ahhhhh the roller coaster that is parenting.

Hi All :)

Freya - Oh that's very exciting for you!! I've always been supportive but suspicious of CMP. I think they're great for low-risk women who stay low risk but when I just don't like that they still bring in all the policy, procedure and political drama to it. I'm a part of a Homebirth Due in Group on Facebook and a few of the women are in CMP's and I feel sad watching some of them fight to stay in the programs. Its so touch and go.

Bella - Glad to hear that Eddie is on the mend :) How's he sleeping now? I've finally managed to wean Daley off the breast now. I haven't had any milk or colostrum for about 5 weeks so he's been dry sucking since then. He's been completely off the breast for about 1 and half now and although he still grabs for my boobs etc, he's going great guns. Our next step is trying to get him to self settle to sleep. At this point we're cuddling him to sleep and TBH i'm ok with that too.

Tegam - 5 weeks already!!!! My god that went quick!!! Sorry to hear your nipples are sore :( I don't miss that pain. I've not had a baby with a lip tie but I know people that have and both have had them snipped. I'm not sure of the research on it sorry. I wish I could offer some better advice.

Hi to everyone else :)

I'm just chugging along here. 28 weeks on Friday. Had my GTT yesterday (which I was initially going to refuse but had it anyway) and gosh it was horrible. I was very tired and lethargic until bed time. Not much else to report really. Slowly gaining momentum in preparing my birth space. I pick up the pool next month. We also do a Birth Prep course then as well which I'm looking forward too.

I guess there isn't much else to do except enjoy the last trimester now :)

Hi Kazzo...

not long till hubby is home so you can start talking over your wishes for this birth. As far as booking in, that is all part of the care with your private midwife, they often bring the forms to you and take them to the hospital for you. My last two midwives also sent any blood results etc to the hospital to have on my file. If you are unsure about whether the homebirth will happen you can book in anytime to the hospital you don't really need any care in these first 28 weeks. Your GP can give you an ultrasound referral if you would like a scan? PM on FB if you have any questions, I am sorry I have been a bit slack xxx

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Thank you all for the welcome.

Thanks for the tip Dotface, it will be a question to add to my list. Have not made anymore plans, waiting until DH gets home next week.

Do you still have to check in to a hospital if your having a home birth? If you do I wont be contacting them until I am past 15wks then. After my last pregnancy and their protocol changes I would rather skip the early runaround they like to do now.

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Sorry haven't read through the response since I joined......am meeting with my hopeful midwife in about half an hour...am a little nervous actually. Hope we get along. Did it take you long to find the right midwife?

How did your meeting go Boomba?

Really good she is fabulous! Cant wait to do this <3

Hi all,

I have attempted to reply about 20 times and keep getting interrupted. Hi to the newcomers, hooray for more home birthed babies!!

Freya-So glad everything is falling into place for you.

Kazzo-I did a back up booking both times, but I left it until 36 weeks the first time and 30 weeks the second time.

Bella-Thanks for asking about us, we are doing well, DD is such a good baby. Feeding really well and sleeping well too (not at all used to that part!!) I've recently cut dairy to see if that helps with her chucking which it seems to have helped a bit so will stick with it. The only crappy bit is, I've already got my period back, not sure what's going on there, it was 10 months with both the boys so feeling very ripped off!
So glad things are settling for you with Eddie, that's great x

Meow-Hope all is well with you x

Hi to everyone else!

Hi ladies,
I am new to this thread... Am expecting my first baby in April next year.. :D
I have booked into a low risk birth centre that offers home birth, and have been told I will be getting a spot on their home birth program.. I know most of the midwives there, so I was able to choose the one that I felt best suited the care I wanted...
Looking forward to sharing and journeying with you all.. x

Hello lovelies!!

Kazzo: I will so be watching your journey as you bring your 4th baby earthside :D DH is super clucky...but i need convincing hahaha.

Danie: welcome welcome welcome!! so exciting! I wish that i had of had a homebirth with my first...missed out on all the awesome the first time around!

Tegam: say what??? 5 weeks already??! wowsers! we have no lip tie experience either. DD had a TT but that was fixed through osteo. And sydney! so cool! i love travelling with little babies...they just kinda lie there and take it all in hahaha.

Ilithya: i love all that birth space prep...i love how it is just your space and you can get it how you want and need...ahh so special!

AFM: well today is memory lane day as DD3 let me know that she was on her way today with my waters breaking in the early hours of the morning...but no labour until just after midnight and she was born 1.5 hours later! my baby will be TWO!!! wowsers!

Kazzo, I didn't book in at any hospital for either of my homebirths. I had a file that I kept with any necessary info.

:baby: Babies Arrived :nappy:

-2012-
Jennifer13- Baby GIRL born at home 4th January 2012
Bella29- Baby GIRL born at home 10th January 2012
HotI - Baby BOY born at home 21st January 2012
*Ash*- Baby BOY born at home 14th February 2012
loulabelle - Baby BOY born at home 24th February 2012
Cricket - Baby GIRL born at home 15th May 2012
chocorama - May 2012
...Em - Baby BOY born at home 7th June 2012
BellyBelly - Baby GIRL born 11th August 2012
Tanya - Baby BOY born at home 16th August 2012
phynna - Baby GIRL born at home 8th September 2012
lady_neon - Baby BOY born 27th September 2012
Ambersky - Baby BOY born at home 3rd October 2012
Cassius - Baby GIRL born at home 4th November 2012
Ice cream - September 2012
mirriumu - November 2012
Pumpkinzulu - Baby GIRL born at home 12th December 2012

- 2013 -
Sara - Baby BOY born 18th January 2013
turtlejane - Baby GIRL born at home 31st January 2013
Bellany - Baby BOYS born 14th March 2013
Ree*Ree - Baby BOY born 18th March 2013
Aimz - Baby BOY born at home 21st March 2013
Beatrix - Baby GIRL born at home 7th April 2013
Rubyshoes - Baby BOY born at home April 2013
Dollyroux - Baby BOY and GIRL born 29th April 2013
HomeStyleMumma - Baby GIRL born 8th May 2013
ladybirdflies - Baby GIRL born at home 23rd May 2013
Cricket - Baby BOY born at home 26th August 2013
Sepata - Baby BOY born at home 31st August 2013
WilliamsMummy -Baby BOY born at home 17th September 2013
Loulabelle - Baby BOY born at home 17th September 2013
Sunnylove - Baby GIRL born at home 2nd November 2013
DotFace - Baby BOY born at home 9th November 2013
Eenee - Baby BOY born at home 22nd November 2013
TeniBear - Baby GIRL born at home 21st December 2013
*The_Mrs.* - Baby GIRL born at home 31st December 2013

-2014-
Jennifer13 - Baby GIRL born at home 1st January 2014
Arcadia - Baby BOY born at home 30th January 2014
Special - Baby BOY born at home 6th February 2014
HotI - Baby GIRL born at home 23rd February 2014
Smoke Jaguar - Baby GIRL born at home 18th March 2014
Bella29 - Baby BOY born at home 13th May 2014
Ozstar - Baby GIRL born at home 20th May 2014
Sterla - Baby GIRL born at home 30th July 2014
Meow - Baby GIRL born at home 26th August 2014
Ladybug - Baby GIRL born at home 2nd September 2014
phyrephly - Baby BOY born at home 10th September 2014
e_p - Baby GIRL born at home 11th September 2014
kellbell - Baby GIRL born at home 19th September 2014
Tegam- Baby BOY born at home 24th September 2014

:pregnant: Babies On Their Way :bellyrubs:


Ilithyia - January 2015
Freya - March
Dani - April
Kazzo - May
Boomba - June

Please let me know if I have missed anybody or anything needs fixing.

ta

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Please let me know if I have missed anybody or anything needs fixing.

ta

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I am due end of May :)

Thanks for the answer Lady bug :)

Ladybirdflies. I know how busy you are hun :) Thankyou.

DH is home now. I brought up having a homebirth. He straight away said no and money was not the reason. He said what if something goes wrong, an ambulance would take over 20min and that he would not know what to do. He thought a home birth was all by yourself :) When I explained that it was with 2 midwives he relaxed straight away.

I told him why I wanted to have a HB and I think he has come around. I am going to organise meeting 2 MW that I like just from communications so far.

So far so good. We started telling people yesterday. I hate that the first thing they say is 'Again' :rolleyes:Makes me want to keep it to myself longer :(

Argh I had a big post typed out and lost it.

Kazzo; welcome to the start of insensitive big family comments :shakehead:

Well Dh met my midwife last week when I went for an appt and he got along really well with her and feels better about the whole shift in care provider now! She answered a few of his concerns ie what happens in an emergency and he realises now that she is well equipped to handle decision making if complications arise. Which Im sure they wont. He did tell her he was not at all going to deliver this baby so if I call and labour is going fast she better speed all the way to our house :lol:

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I am due end of May :)

Thanks for the answer Lady bug :)

Ladybirdflies. I know how busy you are hun :) Thankyou.

DH is home now. I brought up having a homebirth. He straight away said no and money was not the reason. He said what if something goes wrong, an ambulance would take over 20min and that he would not know what to do. He thought a home birth was all by yourself :) When I explained that it was with 2 midwives he relaxed straight away.

I told him why I wanted to have a HB and I think he has come around. I am going to organise meeting 2 MW that I like just from communications so far.

So far so good. We started telling people yesterday. I hate that the first thing they say is 'Again' :rolleyes:Makes me want to keep it to myself longer :(

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I am thrilled that DH totally heard where you are in this decision, how wonderful, what a great start to a HB together!!!
I am sorry to hear that people have such insensitive responses, unfortunately it happens more and more with each baby... People couldn't believe we actually tried to have a fourth not just a whoopsie!! I know what you mean about keeping that secret a bit longer, it's like something sacred is lost when people dribble unconscious words on this gift.. luckily BB mama's are supportive and excited with you!!



Freya... I am so excited that your hubby is supportive about your provider change!! THese midwives have an incredible amount of experience and can be so clued into the subtle changes they can predict needing extra help, it's fascinating!!! I have four girls, and the gender talk did my head in by her due date, even now people can't believe I have four girls... How is everyone going re trying to guess if you are having a girl or a boy? I found the comments about her gender one of the hardest parts!!

We know its another boy so yeah, its been utterly ridiculous the comments we get. Im really struggling to connect with bub and just enjoy this pregnancy as it is so having people be rude about it sucks. We've had a rough year so that doesnt help either. If we could of had a girl we would have, all of us were hoping for one but we dont control what we get. I think Im struggling the most with the sense of letting people down, the kids were pretty upset that it wasn't a sister :rolleyes: