Thanks girls... another night survived although it was a bit rougher than the first. Yesterday was fine, she asked a couple of times but was easily persuaded to do other things instead. She had her bedtime feed and was in bed as per usual at 6pm. She then woke up 3 times overnight (8pm, 10pm and then some other point during the night); the first she settled within a few minutes with a backrub, no protests. The second we were up for about 40minutes and there were tears, it was really hard but she finally got back to sleep after some water and leg rubs... I hopped back into bed and cried and cried and cried. The third was a bit of both, she did half-protest (you know when they are kind of half asleep and give a little bit of a whinge) but was back asleep pretty quick. She asked again this morning but daylight hours are easy to negotiate.

Feeling a bit sad about it. Hate knowing I could easily calm her with milk and I'm not but hopefully it passes quick, she seems her happy usual self when she wakes up so can't be too traumatized... I had always thought she would just wean herself when the time was right and I was in no rush but I know it is better to do it now than be forced into it with a new sister around, I definitely don't want to increase any jealousy/resentment by associating weaning with the new baby. I worry that because we have been breastfeeding so long, I haven't really had to comfort her in other ways and maybe I can't or don't know how but I'm sure that isn't right, just surprised how much security I found in breastfeeding. She did a poo this morning and that reassured me a little that everything will still work haha silly, I know. Still going to be doing the bedtime feed and reassess in a week or two once we are on the other side of this hurdle.

It's weird, I didn't cry when she started solids or turned one (or two) or any of that... but last night, for the first time, there were a lot of tears about my little girl getting bigger.