$2 roundabout rides and 'freeloaders'

[wysiwyg]

Oh if I am putting kids on ride I tend to look round and try find kids to share it with - better full than empty.

[Frantelle]

My ds loves these rides and on a weekend I always let him have a go as a treat.

But what I hate is when DS gets on and I put the money in the ride starts and you can literally see children run to get on the ride, last weekend they freaked DS put so much that he started crying.

So now I but him in the car that only takes two kids and pit my bag next to him so no one else can sit there.

I honestly have no problem if the child is already on the ride then hey more fun for everyone but what annoys me is when they or their children rush to get on because the ride has started or about too. But then what do you say - get off?

[meow]

We avoid all this now because the malls seem to have candy machines rather than rides (!!) but when my eldest was little he got a bunch of free rides. I pretty much never put money in one because he was happy for it not to move. If someone came along while he was playing on it and went to put money in I would warn him it was going to move in case he wanted to hop off (he usually did) or else he got a free ride.

I would say thanks though, but I'm like you and I don't like when people can't say a simple thank you.

I would never put more money in... they just got a ride! Why pay for more rides on the same thing?

[HotI]

i don't often put money in the machines, but my kids like to have a play on them. I don't want my kids to think they get a ride every time we go to the shops, and i don't always have the money for it.

In the original scenario, if my kids were already on it, and the next child didn't want to wait for their go to turn the machine on, then i wouldn't take my kids off but we would thank the parent and child. Otherwise, i see it as we are not as entitled to play as the next person with cash. I do get embarrassed though, and would prefer that they just not offer when my kids are already having fun without the movement.

If i am paying, i have no hesitation if another kid is jumping on and would not want $1 from the other parent or a second ride. if i do it, its because i want to.

Another thought, for some people chit-chat or saying thank you is not always easy. There might be embarrassment because they couldn't afford the ride that day, talking to strangers is difficult, or maybe their head is just not in a good place. Take the child's enjoyment as thank you, you might have given the parent 2 minutes of peace that made her day.

[meow]

Another thought, for some people chit-chat or saying thank you is not always easy. There might be embarrassment because they couldn't afford the ride that day, talking to strangers is difficult, or maybe their head is just not in a good place. Take the child's enjoyment as thank you, you might have given the parent 2 minutes of peace that made her day.

Great comment

[Beach Mama]

We used to always say thanks or let others ride (they're not that interested in them anymore). I would always reiterate how lucky they were because some days mum can't(or won't!) pay the $2 so it's a pretty special day if I pay it or if someone else happens to pay.

[Astrid]

Oddly enough have not seen the original posted scenario happen at out local shopping center. What I have had happen is another parent/grandparent has called us across to put the girls on as there were spare seats.

I am pretty impatient these days so it is pretty rare for the girls to just be sitting on a non moving ride

[Arcadia]

My kids actually like playing on the ride without the movement. It sometimes annoys me that other parents assume my kids want the ride, and I often have to act quickly to get them off before the motion (and crying) starts.

I don't say thank you, I usually say sorry, just let us get off first!!

We each have our interpretation of what constitutes a good time, and for my kids going round and round isn't fun!

Like most things communication is key here, and if my kids want a turn they have to wait, and I expect other kids to wait their turn too. I also think parents should ask others if their kids want a ride and likewise if yes the paying patent should be thanked or compensated. Common courtesy really.

[Rouge]

Like someone else said rather than freeloaders more likely you end up with everyone desperate to put $2 in because concerned about being labelled a freeloader so kids get masses of rides and all takes forever. I personally think the "if in doubt get your wallet out" and people not being able to just accept someone else being happy to share - is worse for society than any sense of entitlement that can be attached to supermarket rides.

Sorry if you thought the two topics were connected. I was talking about two different scenarios. Sorry I didn't make that clearer. Of course generosity and sharing is a valuable lesson. Just as is politeness. The two don't need to be mutually exclusive. My rant was totally separate from the idea of accepting a ride from another. Again I'm probably a weirdo freak

[Jellyfish]

Sometimes entitlement goes both ways, if Im offering a child to join mine Im not doing it with any expectations, it is because I feel it is the right thing to do. If there are extra seats then what harm is there in them being used?

Some people arent raised with proper social etiquette. Some might be embarrassed or flustered and forget, waiting for the right point in the conversation that never seems to arrive, think they already did but then realise later they didnk tnd kick themself. Nobody knows what is happening in the other persons mind or life at that point so if somebody doesnt verbalise a thankyou I still assume that they are. My kindness isnt dependant on anything but my own choice, if somebody messes up in their kindness I try to cut them some slack and even if they arent a "kind person" I dont need to let it detract from mine, they are those most in need of social moddeling in order to learn.

The world needs more unconditional kindness.

But yes, I would always offer and thank but we all knew that would be the consensus...

[nickle730]

$2!! They used to be 20c!

Like most people here, I am happy for other kids to ride if I'm paying and there is room. Like someone else said, I do dislike it when a horde of children come running and climb on without invitation. It's bad manners and it overwhelms my DD. I would never let my kids climb on when someone is paying unless they were invited. I don't feel obliged to repay the favour by putting more money in or offering half, but I wouldn't expect someone else to pay for another ride either, and I would never accept an offer to pay half. If I have chosen to pay for the ride, I know it will cost me $2 - if more kids fit, I'm happy to get better value for money and to see the kids having fun.

Saying thank you is a given, shouldn't even need to be discussed!!

I do think that a paying customer has right of way when it comes to these rides. If I'm not prepared to put money in today and a child comes to use the ride with money, I remove my child. (Often it's the only way I'll get her off!)

[Rouge]

Again see above point. I wasn't talking about self entitlement in that way....

[Jellyfish]

I just dont really see the point to this hypothetical when it is obvious thanking is proper manners. Judging people on one action is kind of misguided, if people picked one instance of my parenting/life there are certainly some bad ones to stumble on. Who knows if those parents do approve of their children swarming? That they arent caught off guard and embarrassed?

Yes offering and thanking is the "correct" etiquette, yes some people fall short but who hasnt in some way at some time? Just because somebody doesnt verbalise thankyou doesnt mean they arent and just because they do doesnt mean they are. Doesnt hurt to give benefit of the doubt and a bit of slack.

[Rouge]

Sorry. I wasn't saying that parents who let their kids go on the rides had bad manners. Or taught bad manners. My gripe was separate.

[nickle730]

I'n not sure that I understand what you're saying, JF? This is a thread in the 'etiquette' section of the forum. It is correct etiquette to say 'thank you' when someone pays for your child to have a ride. Whilst I don't judge someone's entire personality on whether they say thank you in this situation, I do think it is poor manners not to. Someone who is capable of taking their child to the shops and responding in the affirmative when asked if their child would like to ride is surely also capable of the word 'thanks'. I just don't accept that there is any reason to not say 'thank you' in this circumstance.

[Jellyfish]

I don't mean anyone specifically either, sorry! Just a general why is this even a hypothetical in the first place when the large majority of people know that thanking is the correct response to being offered something from somebody else. This isn't really an etiquette debate or discussion but a vent about these nameless 'bad mannered' individuals who could very well likely just have messed up this one time. Or they might not of. But having a huge thread of everyone agreeing that thanking is the right course of action isnt exactly going to change anything.

Show dont tell. Model kindness and manners and all those things you want to see reflected. Yes, entitlement is an issue these days (maybe all days) but having it back isnt the answer. You dont smack to stop hitting, you dont expect to stop expecting. Do we really want to transform thankyou into a meaningless payment for receiving? To have the words said just to have the words said because it is 'proper' and 'right' and makes the world seem 'better'. Or do we actually want to breed thankfulness in others, in ourselves, in the world? Because as I said before those who dont verbalise could still be thankful and those that do might not be. Is it the words or the feeling that is of most importance? Thats all Im trying to say lol.

[Rouge]

Ahhhhh see I think all of that can be done at once. I think perhaps my late night rant took away from the fact that I do think its nice to offer, I have offered. I have also received on behalf of my child. And thanked them kindly and as my children to do the same. But... And this is a big but... Just because its there, just because its offered doesn't mean we always do and can accept.

As for your question, I'm kind of baffled that saying thank you has become a psychological minefield. It's not that hard to say thank you. It's the easiest way to show gratitude in a way that can't be misinterpreted. It's been working for centuries

[Jellyfish]

My mind often confuses itself as it forms ideas and it all falls out too fast but what Im basically trying to get at is it the words or the feeling that people actually care about? Because words can be meaningless, feelings can be felt without verbalisation. Do we actually need people to express their appreciation in the words 'thankyou' for it to be valid? At what point can we just be content in the knowledge that they most likely are? Am I making sense yet? Ill just keep typing till I do lol.

ETA: and yes, I agree people should offer thankyous and I do, often and always and more than necessary lol but I think the bigger picture is that the world needs to actually feel the sentiment behind them before entitlement is destroyed.