at kindy age, i stayed at the playdate venue with my child. Maybe this is not possible for you (other siblings)? but that's the way i handled it, i didn't feel ready to leave her in a strange house by herself. But only having one child, i suppose i had that luxury to be able to make that choice.

Now my child is school age, i am coming against the expectation for me to just drop off my child, with people i barely know, so i'm finding that very challenging.

i agree that gut instincts are a good one to listen to. The one time i ignored those, my child had a very negative experience at one child's home.