Do you find this insulting?

Honestly - who bl00dy cares how people have babies...at the end of the day the teacher in a class isnt going to say now who was born IVF and who was born the old romp and stomp way.

Yes I know that having a baby through IVF means that the parents have gone through hell and back (mentally and Physically) at some stage but then can we say that this means they are better parents for doing so???? Does that make naturally concieved babies the lesser in the human species?

No matter what road we have travelled down to bring a new person/s into this world, the end product is all that counts...........isn't it

KEL firstly thank you for putting this thread up im finding the reading very interesting and different opinions are great to hear.
i have voted as its a very personal thing for us ivf..we are about to do ivf # 3 and we would love twins .

I don't find it insulting as such, but I find it a little crazy to be honest. Why on earth would someone who can naturally conceive a child go through all that IVF involves just to have twins? The injections, the invasive procedures to check the meds are working, for egg collection & for embryo transfer. It's not easy by any stretch of the imagination & I can't begin to fathom why someone would go through all of that without it being an absolute necessity.

I find it a bit insulting that any couple would assume it's as easy as going "ok we'll do IVF to get twins" and then they have their twins. It's not that simple. A lot of the time IVF procedures don't work. Two embryos can be transferred & result in no pregnancy, a singleton, twins or higher order multiples. It's a science yes, but it's not exact & there are no guarantees that it will work exactly as you want it to.

Has anyone considered asking or actually asked their fertility specialist for twins?

IVF is an amazing process that gives us another option with conception. I dont believe in designer making a family but dont find it insulting. I suppose its another progression in our climate of needing to control everything. My concern would be if it were to mean that infertile couples could not access the resources on offer due to fertile couples wanting twins.

I have recently learnt what IVF involves and I too find it odd that someone would opt to go through this being as there are no guarantees for twins but I suppose it does up the chances dramatically.

Kel, DH and I discussed with out FS the difference with one or two embryo transfer - he was initially reluctant, until he'd talked to us at length about the implications of a twins pregnancy/birth/lifestyle - and now the tag line "bring it on" comes out everytime we discuss transfers. i guess in a way, we've now "asked" for twins - or more for the chance at twins kwim?

I don't think this is insulting. I am able to concieve naturally but consiered having IVF due to the possibility of having twins. I have really bad pregnancies and wanted to have two more children without having to go through the whole ordeal twice. It is something i will definately cosider if i was to fall again.

I respect that some women have no coice but i dont see how that should limit the ones that do have a choice.

Happy Babies
B.

i just read the OP to DH and asked his opinion, and his opinion (and i used Kel's direct question)

his answer

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of course it's insulting - it minimises the hell we go through, takes resources away from people that genuinely need help - and who are they kidding? there's no guarantee of twins!!

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I find the suggestion (i.e. in those media rumours) that anyone would choose to go through IVF when they didn't need to insulting - it makes AC seem like a lifestyle choice or something. It's a bit absurd anyway; you can't even 'request' one baby, let alone twins.

Brad and Angelina aside - I think any fertile person who thinks IVF is a great way to have twins, then goes through the whole rigmarole (and it's a HUGE emotional and physical toll, as any IVFer will tell you) knowing that there will be only a one in five chance of falling pg, and then again, once pg, only have a 33% chance of carrying twins, and then an even smaller chance than that to carry them BOTH to term, well, to me, if they want to take that chance, I won't find it insulting because plain and simple, they're COMPLETELY clueless.

Lol! This story makes me laugh every time I read it. If you geniunely think IVF is the easy way to having a child, let alone twins, you're seriously misinformed. More likely you'd end up a a few more singletons than have twins straight off.

Hey Maz.....Kiya here....I so totally agree with what you are saying.....We are going down the IVF path and are wanting 2 put back in to better our chances, and if we have twins, great...We would love them equally and would feel very blessed, because regardless of our they came about they are still very much wanted.....I sadly can't have a TR because the Dr that did it int he first place screwed up my tubes and they are so damaged it would be pointless, plus i also have endometriosis hence also our reason for having IVF....I so can't wait for it all to start, and hopefully at the end of the day be able to hold a beautiful baby/babies and love them and enjoy watching them grow up to wonderful little aussies....cheers kiya

Ok i will declare my interest here
I am an IVF vetran who had twins using IVF.

Do i find it insulting? Not in the slightest- they are not stopping other couple from doing IVF, nor are they hurting anybody- i say goodluck to them

If they want to put their bodies through the hell and complications that IVF bring, and then a twin pg that brings more risks and complications- i say go for it!!!!

I find it more insulting when people ask me how my twins were conceived. Its no ones damm business and it really doesnt matter how the sperm and the egg got together- they did and THAT IS THAT!!!
It really shouldnt matter to us either how their twins were conceived either- what difference does it really make- none at all

hmm my 50 cents worth

odette

I had actually read elsewhere that because her husband was getting on in age, they decided it was better. Brad Pitt isn't 35 anymore, and maybe for them as a couple they thought it best to be able to try their luck at IVF to have twins before waiting for one baby, wait for her to recuperate and then try again.

I don't find it insulting at all.

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Has anyone considered asking or actually asked their fertility specialist for twins?

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Yep we did & we were denied. We were told that the recommendation in NSW (not sure if it's National) is that they will transfer two embryos if the maternal ge is greater than 35 or there have been repeated IVF attempts with no pregnancy. Seeing as I was 28 at the time & it was our first go we were only allowed to transfer one.

I DONT need assisted conception and DO NOT find it insulting

If I had the money and resources to have multiples via IVF I would consider doing it myself. I want a large family and because I am starting a bit late multiples would be a great way to realise my dream.

I'm not offended by using IVF to conceive twins, I'd personall love to have twins so if you could afford it then go ahead.........No govmt assisance tho and as a PP said, def. not priority.

My cuz has to use IVF to conceive and they have been advised only implant 1 embie as it has more of a chance of success, although they'd love twins but I think just having a baby is more important to them.

Cheers,

Beck

In Australia, I do believe that if you walked into any Fertility Specialist's office, said you were otherwise fertile but wanted IVF just to have twins, you'd be laughed out of the rooms so fast your head would spin. And if you did find one that would do it for you, I honestly think you better check to see if his degree didn't come from the internet.

Can't speak for the US of course!

ETA: LMS, IVF isn't much more likely to give you multiples than trying naturally. You'd be throwing your money away and would likely just have loads of single pregnancies anyway. Also remember that the complications of twin pg can often mean you can't keep falling pregnant one after the other like singleton pgs. You can have a child a year if you wanted, and have a big family that way. Having twins ON PURPOSE puts you and your children at risk for the sake of convenience. I don't think it's necessarily the right way to have a large family.

ETA2: also wonder if anyone who thinks IVF is a good way to have multiples knows exactly the kind of hell IVF really can be? Because I kinda get the impression that it's seen as some sort of minor inconvenience!

Hi,

Without relating this to Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt at all. Saying this as just my general opinion, because you dont know if whats been reported about Brad and Angelina is true. I think it is insulting.

I havent needed fertility assistance thankfully but my best friend has and ive watched what she has been through with IVF etc.

I think IVF should be kept for those that genuinely need it.