Long Term TTC & Assisted Conception - Sept 2006

Hello all,

Bit sad today because my TTC journey is taking a year's break. My second FSH cycle has been cancelled because of too many follicles again. The only option from here is straight IVF and after a very tearful session with the IVF nurse going through upfront costs and then a more tearful session over coffee with DH we have decided we are just not in the position to do IVF without Private Health cover. So that means the twelve month waiting period. It is probably a blessing in disguise because at the moment I am only working casual contracts and that would mean no maternity leave let alone maternity pay if I got pregnant now. DH is only just beginning study for a promotion so would be pretty much settled in that respect by the end of twelve months. All in all we would be in a much better position to be pregnant in twelve months rather than now..... well that is what I keep on telling myself to convince myself!!

However our FS has said he is willing to give another FSH cycle a whirl because this time he might be able to get only a few eggs rather than hundreds. So I go back in a couple of weeks and have one more go and then it is a break for twelve months. :crying: :(

Good luck to all you girls. And I will lurk a bit to see how you are going but I will have to wean myself off this site because I need to stop thinking about getting pregnant as much as it is going to hurt!

Good luck!

Fishukie - im very sorry to hear your news. I understand your reasons and that is why we too have been unable to continue with treatment over the last 10 months or so. Im hoping that you concieve your natural mirical while you are waiting your 12 mths. Have you tryed Monash I was a public paitent there although i did have to travel east to west for treatment, but hay it was saving me a few $$$$$.

Jade - im sending you all my sticky vibes and hoping this is the one for you honey.

Megan - It looks like your stuck with me. Nursie said that i should be ok to go b4 gyn goes away with the dates i already have. She kinda gave me some possible date as long as my body does what its ment to, they are, scan 16/10, 17/10 start injections, 23/10 another scan, 25/10 epu, 28th (ish) et. So hope your going well.

Melbel - Your story does sound familiar. we were married in December last year and i had a et in the september befor as i thought it would be sods law that i would be pg for our wedding and honeymoon, i was but mc very early. I didnt care that i would be pg and didnt care that everyone was saying to me dont do it just wait. i would do it all over again if i was in the same situation. follow your heart.

Jane- It's so tricky with work I know, not to mention all the other emotions and drugs we have to deal with im feeling very fortuniate at the moment as i have transerved jobs and my new boss is amazing, she has been very understanding so far but i get the guilts about taking all this time. I really not someone who puts myself first and end up dooing all the things i shouldnt for others.

We'll Dh is thinking that this cycle wont work already as he feel it is too close to my operation at the begining of sept, he keeps telling me he thinks it will be another 2 or 3 cycles. im now too already to start to think will it, wont it and im feeling a little stressed with the desperation that it must work this time.

hi to all and catch up with you all again later tonight
xx

Mel - I agree with Fishukie, no no no! Don't listen to all those negative people, lord knows we can create enough of our own negativity! You have to do what is right for yourself and DH. Big hugs to you :hug:

Fishukie - Sorry to hear your news about the 12 month wait, I hope this last crack at FSH does the trick. :goodluck: Good Luck

Jade - Good luck with your transfer :stickyvibesboy:

Jane - I hope things get less stressful for you soon mate, take care of yourself and don't work too hard!

Loula - Stay positive....I have everything crossed for you.

I start the dreaded injections tomorrow - Gonal F - I have never injected myself before so I am a little freaked out! :eek:

Take care everyone xox

Hi Girls

Well all went well yesterday transferred two blasties and we still have two frozen. They said that the ones that they transferred have a 90% chance of surviving. Fingers crossed I finally get my BFP.

Jade

Sounds very promising Jade - crossing my fingers for you!

Hi Girls,

Well went to see dr gronow on tuesday. seemed nice enough considering we spent all of five minutes in there! Going for an ultrasound to check for any cysts tomorrow if it is all clear iui will start with my next cycle. I never knew you had to do injections with iui! I am so dumb!

That Sounds wonderful Jade - fingers crossed.:pray:

Hiya Zap - good luck with your IUI... I have done IUI but didnt have any injections, what are they for ?

Mel - OMG what a bunch of selfish gits. But I can so understand how you are feeling. I told a mother on the train on Tuesday (with feral six, yes six children all hers, as they were factory heads!), after she rammed her pram into my leg with not even a sorry, I looked at her and said ' Sorry is the word you are looking for" she then went on this tirade how she has had to cart the kids to the show (melbourne show) all day and how they were being naughty little so and so's (the c word was used) and how she had had enough of doing this by herself ... my response was .. well you should of thought about how hard it was going to be before you decided to have a litter of children. :angry:

Ok I admit it was not the nicest of things to say but I have had enough of these people that pop out children with no thought to the childs future and then expect everyone else to bear the brunt, when people who truely want a child and would be good role models have to go through all this palava.

Yes I am over the whole IVF thing and have no patience left in me (poor DH) and Mel you are right it does suck... but at least you can poor your heart out to us and we will listen.

Thanks everyone for all the kind words....you are right of course, I should just get on with it all. It is one reason why we haven't told DH's mum....she would probably be of the opinion we are mucking with nature and she doesn't know we have been trying to conceive this past two and a half years because she once made the comment that she hoped we aweren't going to have kids before we got married. Ummm...Hello....we aint spring chicken dears....ah well, you gotta love the old dears.

They must just about ready to start defrosting your bubba Sari....best of luck for the transfer.

Good luck with your twinnies there Jade and hope all goes well with IUI this month for you Zap

Hi all you wonderful women..I haven't posted in a long time. Would like to come back on in if that's OK, even though for the time being we are on a break from TTC.
My story so far is....TTC 2.5 yrs now..I'm 35, DH 33. Started AI last September. DH and I have unexplained infertility. Tried tracking, Puregon and then moved onto IVF in May 06. BFN. Had 2 blastocyst frosties left and did down reg frozen cycle in July 06 - BFN again.
Currently having a break. Thinking IVF January 07 at this stage....We are blessed to have a DS - 6 already.
The clock ticks by, but we both felt a break was the best thing for our family. Would love to rejoin this post though and chat with you all.
Take care

Janee

Mel,

just wanted to pop in to say that my parents requested that DH and I wait until we got married to start IVF, and stupid, stupid me, I made us wait. We got married Jan 04, started our tests in March 04 (when we got back from our honeymoon) and started IVF in July 04. At that point we'd been trying naturally for 4 years. We finally had success on our 8th cycle, in August 2005!

With IVF the kind of game where every month that you're older counts against the quality of your eggs, goddamnnit, if I'd started investigations earlier, I would have been working with 31yo eggs not 35yo eggs!

A baby out of wedlock would be loved as much, so if I were you, I wouldn't give a rat's what anyone else said and do what you know in your heart you're ready for.

JMO.

Mel, Take absolutely no notice of those inconsiderate people saying mean things to you. If you want a child now then don't wait just because of other people's opinions and expectations. When I found out I was pregnant with my DD we had nothing! We had only just gotten engaged, DH had no intention of marrying me ever, I was 20 he was 22, both living at home with our parents and when I told him I was pregnant he wasn't the most supportive person!.
I suppose my whole point is, that at that time in our lives we looked like we shouldn't have been parents, but you know what? our daughter was loved as much as any other dearly wanted child, and she was happy and healthy. Just because we did things in the wrong order (My MIL said that LOL) it didn't make us bad parents/people.
LOL...here we are now, married, have our own house, responsible etc.. and are having trouble TTC #2!

A big hello to everyone else. We have been away for a few days and had to come home early for DH to go to his great aunty's funeral. Will be able to keep up with you all now that I am home (hopefully) Have a great weekend everyone :)

Nic

I have an announcement to make......I hate Synarel with a passion

I am paranoid I am doing it wrong, the instructions are what you would expect for putting a cabinet together DIY not sniffing nasel spray. I assume I am doing it right because I feel like cr@p. It's hard to tell if it's that or life in general, you know how when you get depressed it's really tiring. I am thinking of taking a couple of weeks off work around pick up and transfer and just kicking back, does that sound like a "do-able" idea? It would be leave without pay but I am at the point I can't keep going I am too tired.

How is everyone else going, I must apologise that I whinge so much but I guess it is better out than in hey?

Lou and Megan - how are you both going? You will have to tell me how Synarel goes for you both or if I am just imaging things.

I am off to get some lunch, hope everyone else is going well, I'll do some proper personals tonight.

Hi Jano... i didn't use synarel, i had lucrin injections. It didn't cause any problems with me at all.... But don't be suprised if you are feeling like cr@p on it, as my girlfriend went wild on it... I am sorry to hear hun you are feeling yuk, but try to remember that the IVF is a positive thing... take care of yourself and your heart.... Leis xxx

Oh sorry Mel, i missed your post.. don't take any notice of these morons... they haven't experienced the hardship you have and therefore have NFI of your emotions and mental state, let along your longing for you and DF to be parents. Who cares if you are not married? I am sure your child will be very much surrended by love and affection by you and your partner when it comes into this world, and this can be given whether you are married or not, so i don't see why your friend has such an issue about it.. they need to get a life.!!! Love and Hugs Leis xxx

thanks Leis, I keep saying to DH, it's going to be worth it and I honestly believe it's worth all this drama. If all the other great strong women around here can cope with it all that's enough for me, it really keeps me going and hanging in there.

Hi Girls

Kim had her U/S and she has 7 follicles already!!! So its full steam ahead, i have had no drugs yet, Kim is sniffing the Synarel and is on 150iu of Gonal F and she is really feeling it!! We go back tomorrow for another U/S and we both have to have blood tests, but Doc is really please with everything and if all goes to plan we will be having EPU on Wednesday and ET on Saturday!! Can't wait!! Because we suppressed kim a little longer on the synarel before starting her FSH the follicles still have a ways to grow, but as it turns out this is excellent news because delaying EPU will give me a chance to catch up and if we have the ET on the Saturday i will be day 15 and will have ovulated so it will be absolutely perfect timing!!! The only drugs i have to have is a HCG injection when kim has her trigger shot (to ensure that i actually do ovulate on time) and then the Crinone every night!!!! So fingers crossed ladies that this is the one!! Thinking of you all xxx

Great news megan... I hope you get some great fert rates and top embies.. love leis xx

Jane, sorry to hear you are feeling awful on the synarel. When did you start?
I've only got a few free days left as I start it on Tuesday and I'm really not looking forward to it. IKWYM about the instruction sheet. There are certainly alot of steps for what I am sure is supposed to be a straight forward procedure!
Hope you're feeling better soon. I decided to take a day off work today. I very rarely take time off and was feeling a bit ordinary this morning. I've decided I'm not going to push myself to go to work during this cycle if I don't feel up to it. Just after going on the pill I got thrush and now I think I have a UTI, and I've never had either. Off to the Dr. for me I think!

Megan, all the best for next week! That's such great news that Kim is responding well and has a good number of follies growing!

Sorry for the lack of personals girls. Can't seem to spend long periods on the computer at the moment due to this niggling headache.
Hope everyone is well and has a great weekend! :D

Twomums, Megan - fantastic news im so happy for kim and you and your post is sending me positive vibes( i can feel it).

Jane - im sorry your feeling so bad on the spray i start with Megan on Tuesday and am not looking forward to it, im sure that you are soing it right and i wasnt too fusy the first time i used it (didnt do it every 12 hrs only when i remembered and forgot to clean each day then ran it under the tap too long, used an old empty bottle once!ect).but managed to still get it to do its stuff

Leis - hows the planning for the trip coming along im so enveious (sp?) and cant wait to hear all your travel stories. I still think you'll come back pg. I did but ectopic!all that sun and relaxation and walking so good for you. good luck hun

Megan - Im hearing you, I was so unwell at work today, had the worst headach and felt so crappy. dreading the spray on Tuesday but would like to know more about lucrin injections! maybe for next time although i should get this one over with first. I hope the uti comes back ok and are you eating lots of youhort with all that good stuff in it. Maybe you need to slow down on the weat intake and vegimite!

nic - i remember when we had the ectopic we were just back from overseas and staying with my nan in London and her responce was it was just as well as we were not marrid and now we are she thinks it will just happen!Old school but i love her so much and find it funny really, the views that she has, she ment no harm by it but i guess she had to go through that with my mum at 17 and didnt want to relive it with her only grand daughter.

Well where am i up to......... me ............
feeling very crappy today as i have already said and may be feeling like i am getting into too much... Applyed for a permotion at work and have a interview on 11/10 but it is for a 3 day a week job (am currently working full time but contract says two days) hope i get it but dont want to be feeing stressed over treatment. Theres that harmony thing hitting me again!!!

Would love to have the TWW off work but have no sick and just enough holidays to take at christmas so thats not an option. I may be able to take one or two days but at a very push and may be more strssed about doing that so really have no idea.PLEASE HELP going loopy over this. boss is being very understanding but dont want to push it i am new in the centre although have been with company for 3 years.

Hi to all and will catch up again tomorrow, Have been asleep since 4.30 and going back to bed

xx

Lou... don't stress to much about your work, if they are understanding, i think you will be fine. When i was doing IVF, I actually enjoyed going to work. Everyone was so understanding, and i had told most about what was going on... When i had my embies put in, they were all patting my stomach and talking to them, saying.. 'now we want to see you in 9 months, so make youself cosy in there'... it was really cute of them...

Well hope everyone is doing fine, I am just about to duck off to the local pub and put my CV in, wanting a change from nursing and with the holiday season looming, they are looking for new 'bar maids'... LOL.... love and hugs leis xx

Mel - Leis put it perfectly when she said:

:

---

don't take any notice of these morons... they haven't experienced the hardship you have and therefore have NFI of your emotions and mental state, let along your longing for you and DF to be parents. Who cares if you are not married? I am sure your child will be very much surrended by love and affection by you and your partner when it comes into this world, and this can be given whether you are married or not, so i don't see why your friend has such an issue about it.. they need to get a life.!!!

---

:clap: ....exactly.

Jano - I havent used Syranel either just the lucrin, but I have heard it is hard to be sure you are taking the right amount (even though you almost always are - Im sure its natural to be worried), and that it tastes bloody awful too. I assume its similar to Lucrin in it making you a bit of a hormonal mess.... try and hang in there and know we are here for venting anytime... but also keep in mind, you are taking steps to getting that baby you so deserve, sweetie :hug: I think taking some time off certainly cant hurt, thats for sure.

Megan & Kim - all I can says ladies is GOOD LUCK! It is sound very promising and, well pretty much perfect. I will be sending you tonnes of follie growing vibes, followed by many more tonnes of sticky vibes!

Megan - Firstly I am going to have to call you something different from two mums, I always worry its confusing for you guys! Secondly that is great that you are about to start the Syranel - although it aint gonna be fun - it will be worth it if you get that wonderful result we all strive for and I really really hope you do, sweetheart. All the very best with it!

Leis - how are the holiday plans coming? Getting excited yet?? :D

Lou - I know easier said than done but really try not to stress yourself out. I hope it gets sorted so you are feeling a little more at ease and can focus on looking after yourself through this... hang in there... :hug:

Me, well its long and painful so I wont go into too much details, but things are looking bad for us in the TTC dept - recent test that has shown up more problems that we never realised before... but am keeping hopeful whilever there is any glimmer of hope left... DH is away tonight, so I am home alone and thinking I could do with some chocolate!

Keen darling. I read that you were seeing the lovely Dr Sacks. I really hope he can help you with the bad news you have had.
Sounds like you are having a bit of a feeling sorry for yourself day, like I am. They rang at 1pm to say only one of our 4 embies fertilised. I have no chocolate in the house but I have eaten every other bit of crap I can find. LOL. But I know how lucky I am as I am watching barbie dvds with a gorgeous 4 year old.
Keen, look after yourself tonight. Get your favourite takeaway, a girlie DVD and some chocolate to help take your mind off the bad stuff that has been happening lately.

Keen,

I'm sorry your tests have come back showing more problems. Though will Dr Sacks be able to help?

Anney, I'll be praying for your one little emby, matey. It's disappointing, I know.:hug:

Keen - im so sorry hun,is there treatment that you can start with the doc's advice to get through and improve your results. im saying this in a very positive way as i know it is hart breaking but at least you know where to go now you have the results. i wish there was with you tonight, you dont have to say anything just to be there.xx

Anney - im so happy for you that you have one embie as that is sometimes all it takes. when is you tf? im thinking of you.

Leis - i know stressing is the last thing i need to do.

Ive just been to see a lady that im having counciling with (not with clinic ) and im feeling much more positive. she too said she can see that its comming. but if i think of the negative then i will not allow the positive to happen. also easier said than done.

Just like when someone tells you not to think of a Elephant eating a lemon...................what are you thinking of?

About work im going to take it easy and voice myself to the other ladies that i work with to step up when i need them (they have told me to just let them know, but i hate asking for help). I will promis myself i will carry on as normal (we'll see. lol) and go with it.

Thanks girls for being there and putting up with me.

Keen - I am so sorry to hear you have had more bad news, I wish I could do or say something that would make things better for you. Sending you a huge hug.

Lou - glad to hear you are feeling better and that the counselling is helping

Leis - good luck with your CV and job hunt

Megan - ouch UTI and thrush - I would need a day off with that as well

Megan - thinking of you and Kim, got everything crossed for you this cycle

Big hi to everyone, I know I keep missing a few in my personals.

I am relaxing on the couch today, I am tired as I didn't sleep last night (shouldn't have eaten mexican LOL). I still feel a bit blah, I called the nurses today as I have been breakthrough bleeding and cramping but they think it is OK, just need to call if it gets any heavier. I used to always get breakthrough bleeding on the pill so they think it is the same thing again. Good thing I come of the pill on Wed and then it's only one week until my scan.

:hello: girls....

Jano - Take care of yourself. You are seeming really flat lately. Big fat hugs to you hun

Keen - I am so sorry to hear of your bad news.. I too, like Jane wish i could do or say something, but words will not heal your anguish... Super sized jumbo hugs :hug: for you

Megan - heres to a great result from this cycle

Lou - glad things are slightly improoving!

Sush - gday to you and bubba Charlie, who no doubt is growing fast everyday!

Megan - good luck to you as well sweetie

Me - DH has got his long service approoved at this stage, so we should be flying out for 8 weeks on the 19th of Feb. Man I am going to miss you guys so much...I will be checking in on you from the internet cafes around Europe ...

Took my CV down today, to the local, the manager is best friends with one of my mates from Sydney, so she actually organised it for me (my mate in sydney is currently on her second IVF cycle, first one she got a bub, yes it does work!!!) Just need to get my RCG but I already have RSA, from when i was a hostie with Ansett, as the aircraft were licensesd as such. Other than that, my mother is driving me slightly mad today, as i told her i didn't want to nurse anymore, she is very dissappointed that i now want to be a 'bar maid'..its not like I am going to be a 'topless bar maid'.. God get over it....

big hi and hugs to everyone.. leis xxx

Anney - honey, Im so sorry about your fert results. I know they say you only need one and thats true, but its hard to take when you go through all that you do on a stim cycle to end up with only one chance. :hugs: to you my sweet - I am sending you a virtual box of choccies SO big, they need to be shipped to you! And so many growing vibes for your super strong little emby!
I am having a feeling sorry for myself time at the moment. I rarely do, but I think it may be best if I post it all in a vent post - rather than bring down anyone in here who is trying to stay on the up....

Leis - your mum will just have to "get over it" - you need to do whatever makes you happy, sweetheart!

Im heading to the vent forum for a post.... just to get it all out IYKWIM?

Hi Girls

Change of plan, Kim and i had a U/S yesterday and i had bloods done and due to my cycle needing to catch up to kims, we will be having trigger shot Tuesday (3rd Oct) night and EPU Thursday (5th Oct) , which means that the ET will be on Monday (9th Oct) when the embryo's will be at day 4, so should see which ones will be on there way to blastocyst by then... Doc says that if in doubt, delaying EPU is always the best plan of action. So imagine the agony of waiting to see how the embryo's go after 4 days!!!!!!!!!! i guess it will still only be a TWW from the 5th Oct tho!! My estogen levels were perfect for CD9 yesterday and so the delay is just to ensure that i ovulate and that my cycle will be just perfect for the transfer!! Also we will be able to pick the best looking embryo to transfer by day 4, then they will go on for another day to be frozen at day 5!! Kim still had 7 maybe 8 follicles there but they are all the same size which is good news doc said!! I have one follicle there a bit smaller than kims hence doc delaying EPU...but at least we know with the trigger shot i will ovulate and my lining should be great!! Only 6 more days until we know how the fert rates go...Kim is starting to freak out wondering if her eggs will even fertilise, after my poor effort...but we cant both have the same problem surely!! Fingers crossed ladies!! Thinking of you all xxx

that is great meg and kim... i am sure you will get some great fert rates... all the best.. leis xxx ps yep that is good that they are all growing at the same rate.. mine didn't and i only got two eggs... all the rest were way to small...

great news Meg&Kim! I have always had blast transfers and I tell you those 5 days waiting are pretty hard... but it is easier than the 2ww.... I think... actually I suppose it is much the same. But at least you will know that you are putting back ones that would have made it at least that far IYKWIM?

Fingers crossed for your catching up to Kim, Meg!

Keen - Lotsa hugs :hug:

Megan and Kim - Fingers crossed for you both this month.

A quick hello to everyone else :hello: will come back later to catch up with you all

Nic

I just woke up and i have (sorry if TMI) i'm bleeding!! Its not red but its not just pink and its not old blood its like creamy dark pink blood, mid-cycle blood...i rang Doc and he said to press on and tomorrow he is going to do an ultrasound to check my lining and if worse comes to worse then he will do the EPU and freeze the embryo's until we can get me under control....I have NEVER had mid-cycle bleeding...and Doc cant explain it, he said i'm nowhere near ovulation at CD11...he just doesn't know...I hope it goes away...everything was going perfectly until now :crying: :crying: :crying:

Meg stay calm hun, and just wait until tomorrow and see what it brings.. leis xx

meg, honey, am hoping it is just your body being evil and playing games with your head - I know mine has done that a few times when coming up to a cycle... hope like crazy it stops and you can still have your transfer... :crossfingers:

Well im having a really bad night and just hope that Megan is around?

I know i am starting the synrel 2morrow but cant remember if im to stop taking the pill so i dont know what to do as i cant get onto the nurse until after 10 2morrow and i usually take the pill at 8am. Maybe i should just take the spray am then take the pill to work with me and take it a little late if i have to.


What do you think?

Be back later for personals

thats what I would do Lou, those two extra hours or so shouldnt make too much of a difference with the BC pill. Ive never used the pill or syranel, so cant be of much help, sorry.

Hi Lou,
My instructions from the nurse are start the synarel tomorrow and continue the pill until all 21 of them are gone. This means there is a 5 day overlap where I will be taking both and will finish the pill saturday (YAY!). I think this is pretty standard.
If you call your nurse at 10am I'm sure it shouldn't make any difference for you to take your pill a couple of hours later than normal.
I can't believe how quickly time is flying. We'll be having EPU before we know it!

Lou - I am still sniffing and taking the pill at the moment. Like Megan I have a 5 day overlap as well.

Well.....I went to see Lyndon Hale today.....all very interesting. He says several things could be causing the miscarriages and so has ordered extensive blood work ups for both me and Geoff. This includes testing for Factor V Leiden , antiphospholipid thingys, and a full karotyping for both of us. I guess if nothing else at least we will know what dodgy genes we have!!

Basically our options appears to be to either undergo stimulation using injectibles on a natural conception cycle increasing the risk of multiples but providing a nice lining for bubs or a full ivf cycle with PGD (pre genetic diagnosis) of the blasties. The bugger is that the tests can take up to five weeks to come through so we have an appointment in six weeks time to discuss the results. I'm not very good at waiting........

If we happen to fall pregnant in the meantime we have to ring him straight away and arrange careful hormonal monitoring not just hcg levels to see if I need to be supplemented in any way with pessaries etc.
Seems to have been quite a few BFPs the past few days....Congrats to all those and good luck to those who are still waiting.....nye nyes time now.

hi Girls

I have to have a not so natural cycle after all, still spotting...went to doc this morning and had an ultrasound anyway, he said the uterus still looks good but when he took the wand thingy out it had some blood on it, still not bright red, just pink... he has decided to put me on some estogen tablets and progestrone pessaries to ensure i get a lining thick enough by monday for the transfer, had a blood test too so should know the results later today...kim and i both have the trigger injection tonight and kim's egg pick up goes ahead on thursday...so hopefully the "leakage" of my lining will stop with the extra hormones that i will be having...i have to take 2 progynova in the morning and two progestrone pessaries at night until i have the pregnancy test...can't help but think when things go wrong the whole cycle is doomed...:crying: