I too am sorry that your beautiful boys are in heaven.
I am yet to have assisted conception but have been in the process.
My story. I started ttc in Au/Sep 08 (16months now) after two m/c in June I went to see a Gyno for recurrent m/c. He told me to come back in a year.
In July another BFP which ended in an ectopic pregnancy. I was then diagnosed with PID, endo, adhesions and now have one tube. DH also has a lowish sperm mobility and morphology but I have still been pregnant 4 times to my DH. Weather the sperm abnormalities contributed to my m/c's (not ectopic) I will never know.
I have had tests (lap and dye, BT etc) all show I should be able to concieve naturally. However my Gyno told me he will refer me to have IVF as soon as I want. He suggested ttc for another 6months but not leave it another year before heading down that track. I did tell him we were definately open to IVF/ICSI so he wasn't trying to push it on us as we did say when asked we would definately give it a go if needed and we didn't want to wait too long. IUI is not an option for us as my tube (only have one now) is abit damaged. So in 16months this is whats happened and what we know about our fertility. Another 6months we will be starting IVF if no BFP before hand. Clomid for me has never been discussed as I do ovulate every month.
I am 26 almost 27 and my DH is 28. We do have one DD together and I have another DD from a first relationship.
I definately think going on your history a FS would or should be more then willing to help you get a BFP quicker and see why its taking some time. Best of luck. Maybe you just need to make the appointment and you will get another BFP before the appointment like last time.