About 10 days ago I started bleeding, the 1st night we went to the hospital and had a scan and they gave me progesteron injection, took my HCGs, the next day my dr rang and said if your stil bleeding come in tomorrow. so , we went in, my HCGs were very low, had another scan and baby had died, so started the testing for a general anasthetic, after we sat outside waiting for the doctor. in the line was about 8 women wanting abortions (here with the 1 child policy most women have to have an abortion some time in their life) I saw them go in and half an hour they came out in a wheel chair holding their tummys in pain. when it was my turn, the anethitist came and got me, lead my to the table, there was blood on the steps up to the table and blood on the floor at the end of the table, the put the iv in and that was that, I dont remember anything untill I had to get on the bed in the recovery room.
It was a strange experince. and I have trouble separating myself from "abortion" I know my baby was dead and it had to be removed before it made me sick (I have rh neg blood my husband has positive) but ... and for it to just suddenly been gone, feels very strange.
We are now staying at his parents place as hes really busy at work and here there is a "lay in" (bed rest with strict rules- no tv, no reading, no music, no showers, no washing hair and more) for a month. everybody is gone in the day time, MIL brings me lunch every day and at night I cant play with my other 2 kids and DH is working at home. feeling very lonley and lost I have had a sneaky shower and am waching CSI on dvd sneakily but its just to get me through the day.
How long before I start to feel better? physically and emotionally? spritually I know it will be awhile.
I just feel like custard now
you poor thing, not only to have to go through loosing your baby but to be faced with a place like that, it sounds horrible...
physically you shouldnt take too long to feel better, but yes emotionally it takes a bit longer, and I think given how you had your procedure done, it might take a big longer. Give yourself time, time to heal emotionally.
Those strict rules your inlaws have sound nuts, but I believe their culture is very strict, and they really believe it, so I guess you cant argue with that.
So sorry to hear of your loss Doubletrouble - it sounds like your recovery (mentally and physically) is taking place in a difficult environment. Take care of yourself. xx
Not sure how long we will be here for. DH is chinese and he wanted to come, so we threw about "5 years" and see, now he has just started a business so we will have to renew that idea I think. I will be bringing the kids back for a month or so in July though so that will be something to look forward to.
-The month is a cultural thing and I think we'll go home next week
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