Ectopic Pregnancy

[LadyRose]

Hello, I'd posted part of my story here: https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...35#post3177535

Long story short is that I have low and slowly rising HCG levels, low progesterone and PCOS. A scan yesterday when I should be about 7 weeks saw nothing, no changes to uterus, no sac. I do have a retroverted uterus but they assured me they checked thoroughly. I've had no bleeding or pain but based on ruling everything else out they have said its Ectopic and i'm booked for Laproscopy tomorrow. The dr said that they will REMOVE THE TUBE if there is an ectopic. (I have so much emotion surrounding this but right now I'm in shock). I need to know if anyone else has had an Ectopic and did they remove your tube? Will I be able to get pregnant again? I am also struggling with denial, every step of the way i've felt the drs were wrong, I still believe I'm pregnant and that they just can't see it for some reason, even though I've been told by different drs that they should see *something*. I'm extremely anxious about going in, I feel like maybe it just needs more time. I don't know if this makes sense, I'm not dellusional, I'm just struggling to believe this is happening. It's not what I feel was meant to happen, I can't get my head around it. And I don't even had much time to, I have to pack tonight and be there in the morning. I'm not even mentally ready for surgery (that's a separate issue for me). Is not believing it at first normal? or should I discuss this with the dr? Sorry if this is a bit confusing but I'm exhausted, the past 2 weeks have been hell and this is just the last straw for me.

[glenny_c]

honey I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I haven't been through this myself but would imagine what you're feeling is very normal. I can try and reassure you a little though, I also have PCOS and only one tube. I was told it was unlikely I would fall naturally so we did IVF to get my DD. However, despite my PCOS, Endo and only one tube, I conceived DS after 4 months of trying so yes, you can definitely get pregnant again.

Don'y let the drs rush you into anything. I understand if it is an ectopic then you only have a certain window where it is safe but if you have questions, make sure you get to ask them. Good luck honey.

[foreva*your*mummy]

I have not has this happen but I too didn't realize they would take your tube!. I am so sorry that this is happening. But do ask all the questions you need too with the doctor.

[Mildez]

I too am so sorry this is happening. What a horrible shock.

In 2009 I had an ectopic pregnancy. It really was soul shattering at the time as we had been trying for 18months and had had a m/c a few months earlier. The ordeal stretched on for over a month and it was hell. Tp start with my Ob insisted I'd m/c and refused any investigations. My HCG initially went down so he assured me I'd m/c. HCG at 5weeks was 78 and then 2days later was 62. A month after that HCG was 5200 and only a few hours later was 6000. I'd ordered my own blood work and knew the results and I just knew the pregnancy was ectopic as I work as a midwife and all the maths added up the pregnancy was not progressing normally. The ultrasound took almost an hr to find the pregnancy which was tubal (in which time I had alot of pain) they were just about to give up and take me into surgery anyway as there was no sign of a uterine pregnancy. By 6weeks using good ultrasound equipment you should definately see signs of pregnancy (thickened uterine wall, beginings of a sac etc even if the HB can't be seen)

I did have surgery and had my entire tube and my pregnancy removed. I later found out the Dr who did it (it was an emergency on a late Saturday night/Sunday morning so in the rural area I was I didn't have an option on who did the surgery) anyway the Dr who did it just happened to be from a leading IVF clinic and removed the tube and sewed what was left so I didn't have a stump. Usually they leave a stump which means there is a higher chance of repeat ectopic down the tract. I went on to have further surgery at my request 3months later as my remaining tube was damaged. They flushed it under as general and removed some adhesions. They Dr didn't give me much hope of falling pregnant naturally and said after a further 6months trying to start IVF (we had indicated prior to this we were keen on assisted conception)

We had just done our paperwork and were about to start IVF when we got our next BFP 10months after the surgery to repair my remaining tube. DD is now almost 18months old. So I'm another who has conceived with only 1 damaged tube and endo.

Is methotrexate a possibility? If your HCG is under 4000 then maybe thats an option so you can save your tube.

[HomeStyleMumma]

I'm so sorry to hear of you situation you must be finding it extremely difficult. I have no personal experience except for my 1st pg the gp thought was ectopic because I was having localized pain on one side and an early ultrasound didn't find anything. But after that continued on to have completely normal healthy pg & delivery. I don't say this to give you any false hope I just wanted to encourage you to keep pushing the des to do more investigating before any drastic surgery or such...

I also wanna say a friend of mine had to have a tube removed and I she told me that in normal circumstances a woman is just as likely to get pg with one tube as two. Apparently because the hormones just all get directed to the remaining tube for ovulation just on that side. I don't know but she is very knowledgeable from being through quite a bit of fertility 'issues' and is a close relative of one of the best OBs in the state.

Great big though hun I hope you get some good results either way...

[LadyRose]

Thank you for your replies. I think I'm having a breakdown, I couldn't get up this morning and i'm not doing anything to get ready. I think I would be better if dh could come to the hospital, but i have to go alone and i'm scared, angry, anxious. This isn't related but this is the 4th time i've been hospitalised in 11 months (other health problems) and i feel physically sick just thinking of going to the hospital. I'm thinking if i just leave this then it will go away? That doesn't make sense when i write it but thats what i feel. I've been put to sleep before and had procedures, not this type of surgery but the way the anesthetic rushes through is like ice water and i'm so scared to go through it again. I know i'm going to cry, and i hate crying in front of male drs... I don't want them to take my tube, i really believe i need it. Again i know this sounds weird but i feel possessively desperate that they don't touch it as though they were suggesting taking an arm, does this make sense? I don't think i'll be able to function without it. I tried googling as much info last night as i could but i feel worse. There were women who've had many EP's and it says you're likely to have another one. So if they take this tube, then i get another one and lose the other tube, what happens then? I don't understand. I do remember he said something about a medication they give if its early enough but that i'd have to go to the womens hospital to have that done and that it didn't work and sometimes they'd have to do the surgery anyway. My HCG was about 4400 as of WEDNESDAY, i'm guessing its up about 6000 now going by history. Should i ask about this medication? Would YOU try it even if they said it was a low chance of working rather than going straight for the tube? Part of me thinks just go the tube to get this over and done with. I've been through hell thinking my baby was gone, then back again, then gone again, now ectopic over the past 2 weeks. I named it because this baby was a miracle for us at the time it was conceived and i believe a gift as it lifted us up from the slump we'd been in for so long. Thats why i'm trying to hold on to it, i don't believe its meant to go, I believe its meant to be here with us. I can't imagine life without it, I can't imagine life without a tube, I don't think this is meant to happen. Sorry for rambling, i'm really struggling with every aspect of this and I don't have anyone to talk to about it.

so honestly would you try the medical drug if thats an option but unlikely? How do i just get through this?

[Joeve]

Oh sweetheart I just don't know what to say. I am so sorry you have to face this today x

[surprised]

Massive hugs hun. You really need to tell someone at the hospital what's going on so they can get you some support. I hope your day isn't as difficult as you're thinking it will be xo

[HomeStyleMumma]

Firstly your anxiety about losing a fallopian tube is COMPLETELY justified DO NOT let anyone make you feel like you are overreacting or irrational for feeling the way you do- it IS an organ and a part of you just as an arm or leg or ear or whatever! Just because you don't see it or HAVE to have it doesn't make it unimportant. I honestly don't know what I would do in your situation but if you have someone/anyone to go with you please do. You need to have some support I feel. Also you can request another ultrasound and or opinion. You also have a right to refuse surgery if you choose to. *im NOT telling you to refuse merely hoping you will make a completely informed and wise choice so you will hopefully feel less guilt/mourning afterwards because it is a huge thing to lose a part of your body*
I hope I haven't overstepped any boundaries.

[LadyRose]

Mrsbaz, i needed to hear that its normal to feel like this.

My dh meant well but said at least i'll still have one. I asked how he'd feel with one testicle.

That said i wish he was here, he's working on a deadline today and basically said if he didnt turn up he might as well not go back. I thought of postponing this but he said he couldnt bare that if something happened. I dont have any friends or family in australia. Just dh parents, his mum is looking after my 4 year old. I rathered he not be here because i dont want him to see ne like this.

I said i couldnt go through with it unless they did another scan. So theyve sent me down to imaging and i'm waiting. I just have to see it again.

I hate this, i dont want to b here. I dont want anyone to cut me open and do anything. It makes me feel so out of control.

[Trillian]

I'm so sorry you are having to go through this Women can and do conceive after losing a fallipian tube - there was a woman in my baby buddies group a few years ago who had an ectopic pregnancy at 9 weeks and they removed her tube. It took her a little longer to get pregnant than it normally would, but within 12 months she was pregnant again and gave birth to a little girl.

[LadyRose]

That was awful. U/s tech asked me what the point was as i'd already had one on wednesday. I said i just needed a final look and she didnt talk to me for the whole thing. I asked if she could do an internal and shr said there was no need! I'm on the verge of going home i cant deal with this. Everyone is treating me like this is trivial and meaningless. I've tried thinking about being abke to conceive again but i dont want to, i just want this baby.

[Mummy&Daddy2Be]

That was awful. U/s tech asked me what the point was as i'd already had one on wednesday. I said i just needed a final look and she didnt talk to me for the whole thing. I asked if she could do an internal and shr said there was no need! I'm on the verge of going home i cant deal with this. Everyone is treating me like this is trivial and meaningless. I've tried thinking about being abke to conceive again but i dont want to, i just want this baby.

oh my goodness hunny. i'm sorry i've had no experience with this but... that is TERRIBLE the way they're treating you. i wish i could be there with you right now . there's nothing else you can do but put your foot down and demand what you want, or maybe try another hospital, or clinic etc? to get a second opinion, and maybe get treated nicely.. don't you dare think that your situation is trivial or meaningless. i can't imagine what you're going through right now. stay strong hunny... much love

[MLR1901]

Ask for the imaging manager, a female sono should have somewhat understood!
You are in every right to be defiant about your feelings.
I personally have had an ectopic, but I do know more than one ladies who have one tube and have gone on to fall and carry healthy babies.
But yes I don't like hospitals either, so your completely in your own right to be upset.
Good luck avid hope all works out for you xxxx

[frog]

I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through this this is a terrible experience, and I'm so sad to hear that the doctors and medical staff aren't treating your baby with the level of importance it deserves.

I had an ectopic 6 years ago, when I was 19. The doctors kept telling me everything was ok, but I knew something was wrong. It ruptured one day, and it was the most agony I have ever felt. Obviously by that stage it was too late to save my tube, and I had a lot of internal bleeding from it too, so I had to have emergency surgery. I had a very unsupportive partner at the time and he blamed me for it. I found it very traumatic, despite my situation I wanted that baby, right or wrong. I also didn't seek any help mentally, I just didn't want to believe it was real. I had never been in hospital, and I was treated like dirt because I was young and my partner at the time was a drug addict alcoholic!

Fast forward a few years, and I had put on 30kg and was diagnosed with PCOS, and rarely ovulated. I was extremely worried about only having one tube (plus it felt like I was missing something compared to other women), and scared of it happening again. My current partner was very understanding when I got neurotic about temping etc! I took soy iso and we used preseed and fell pregnant after 2 months of serious trying. For 6 months before we were not trying/not preventing. I am now 21 weeks, and was monitored very closely in the beginning to make sure it wasn't another ectopic.

My doctor told me if I had another ectopic, I would need IVF, but my ovaries etc would still be fine, they don't take those. So there are still very good options, but there is still a big chance too that it is a one off. Also with the PCOS, she said that I would fall into a "sub fertile" category and could be put on clomid to make sure I ovulate each month.

I know falling pregnant again is probably not the big thing on your mind at the moment, and I'm sorry for the long post, I just wanted to let you know you are not alone and that while every persons experience is different and taken in different ways, there is still hope. Give yourself time to heal and recover, not just physically but emotionally. I certainly felt that losing a tube was no different to losing a finger or something-not crucial to my life but difficult to live without. Your body is amazing and can still function for making babies with one tube, but it isn't the point.

BTW, the medication is called methotrexate, I won't describe the way it works here because I feel it may be insensitive to the OP, but it can only be used early on before the tube is damaged. I'm no doctor, but it might be worth asking about this as an option, I was told if the doctors had their act together sooner with me, this would have been an option. In hindsight, I think it might have made me more scared of another ectopic with that tube still there. In my laparoscopy they took a good look at the other tube to see whether it had any damage. They even printed and let me keep some pictures from inside my abdomen, maybe gross to some but it helped me come to terms with it.

Again sorry for the epic post, but I'm always available for a chat if you want a shoulder. Thinking of you and wishing you the strength to get through this.

[ladybirdflies]

Ladyrose, sounds like this is all happening really fast and with not much support emotionally or professionally. Have you got a Dr you can talk to? Or EPAS at the hospital? THis must be extremely traumatic for you, and as best we can we will all support you from here, but I really hope you find some support IRL.

Take care,

LBF x

[Crowe]

Hi Ladyrose,
Firstly I want to send you huge hugs and strength your way. I have had an ectopic twice and still managed to fall pregnant naturally. I have had methotrexate for one and it cleared the tube but I wasn't allowed to fall preg again for six months (this med I believe is a chemo drug). I thought it would be good to save the tube but have since been told by my FS that the tube is rendered no good after the ectopic anyway.... You have every right to be anxious about this, take your time and don't be rushed.

[LadyRose]

Thankyou those posts do help. I know i'd b ok if my dh were here and this is the worst time that he cant be. I will ring him as soon as they get me to my room. I've just seen the dr and filled the forms. He said the medication, mex-something is a long shot option, they dont give it after hcg reaches 10000 and mine was half that yesterday. Its likely by the time they transfer me and go through all the red-tape it will be too late. I think its not worth the risk that it wont work and i'd gave to have the lap anyway. The actual dr i saw here is nice he offered to do an internal himself to make me feel better. But i believe them now, my baby is obviously not where it should be. I'm trying to accept it. He said they remove the tube to prevent future ectopics in thereand that my other tube should b healthy. I cant think that far ahead but i pray it is. So my operation will b in the next few hours. I just want it over with now, the fear is replaced with heartache.

Thanks again for your replies. I'm not sure how i'd b coping otherwise.