Miscarriage/Loss General Discussion #2

Keike no way don't give her your baby things they are for your baby who is circling around trying to decide when it's time to land. xx

Oh Sara, I'm so sorry this has happened to you. My heart aches for your loss. :( You're very brave to share your story so soon. What a traumatic experience.

Keike- I wouldn't give away my baby stuff either. I understand. I had a 6 pack of NB socks in my drawers for 3 years, untouched. They were for Shelby. Nobody was taking my precious things. :hug:

Sara - so sorry for what you are going through. my heart breaks for you.

Keike - There is no reason for you to feel you should give away your baby stuff. People will give her lots of gifts and be buying her things regardless of whether you hand over your baby things. She wouldnt even notice. I am sure your mum meant well, but I dont understand why she would suggest it. Did she think it would be closure for you or helpful emotionally??
I really hope you dont feel pressured to do something you dont want to do.

HPL - always thinking of you and sending cyber hugs your way. See you back here hopefully on a happier thread when its right for you.

AFM - not much going on, just wanted to check in and see how everyone was doing.

Oh Sara .. I am so sorry Reid couldn't stay with you. I am heartbroken for you.. truly I am. :comfort:

Tilly girl - I've been thinking about you today also.. I'm sorry I don't have the right words. But I guess no words are right, are they. x

Hope - Oh hun, know we are here when you are ready to join us once more. Thinking of you xx

Keike - Geeze that just blows, doesn't it. It really isn't fair. I don't understand how the universe lets this happen. No, no do not give her your stuff. It is yours. It is for your baby. :hug:

Diamond :hug:

Listening to John butlers song, "spring". Please, please, please please, those having a hard time - you tube it. and google the lyrics. Listen to it. It will fill your heart.

My body is playing tricks on me. If I wasn't so stubborn. I'd probably admit I'm having another miscarriage. But I am stubborn. So I'm going to say I am imagining everything. And this is just a crazy AF.

Love to all.

x

Oh god Sara, I can't believe it. I am so sorry.

Little Reid you were so loved and wanted. I wish you could have stayed.

Sorry am away at the moment. Just popped in and saw Sara's post. I'll read back more tomorrow. All my strength xx

Thank you all so much for your kind words and suppot.

Today I am organing Reid's cremation. Never in my life did I ever think I would be organising a burial for my own child. Never. I almost feeling selfish saying.

I feel suprisingly strong. Right now anyways.

Once again, thanks all.

I hope I can offer you all the same support soon.

Remember you don't have to stay strong Sara. You can scream, cry.. Do what you need beautiful. I hope today isn't too horrible :hug:

Good morning ladies :grouphug:

How is everyone this morning? I'm doing ok.

Sara, I am so sorry for your loss. I completely understand about organising your child's burial. My uncle died from cancer years ago and my grandfather said at the time that there is something alien about a child being buried before it's parents... something wrong... :hug:

I pray you'll continue to have the strength you need to get through the next couple of days.

HPL: I get the break thing. Take your time. Enjoy your beautiful DD and lovely DH, spend time with your family, do whatever you need to do.

Keike: That must be heartbreaking for you, I am so sorry. And no, I don't think its wrong to want to keep your things for your baby.

Sara take your time. There are enough of us here able to support at the moment, able to hold your hand. I thought of you all night. I wish there was something I could do. Remember I'm only over bay side if you need an IRL help.

Oh Telly, NO! Not again. Why?! You don't deserve this.Nobody does. But especially not my beautiful friend. :( I realise now how ominous my msg to you was. My radar wasn't clouded. :( I wish I still lived around the corner to offer you squishy hugs and tequilla shots. Do you have IRL support? Do you even tell anyone?

A solitary tear rolls down my cheek for you. :(

Sending strength and love for you today Sarah :hug:

Diamond: How are you today sweet?

OP - I love your little sig additiong :)

Telly - The words I wanna say will only be consored. Can you take it really easy for the next couple of days and hope for the best?

Fricken hell. My cousin that's pregnant? I just got told her 17 year old daughter is too.

Oh Telly, I'm so sorry I missed your post. Dear telly, that is just not fair. :hug: Be kind to yourself.

Keike: thanks, and oh my gosh, are you serious? Sigh. That must just be a double blow. I don't even know what to say. Wish I could give you a big hug in person. Go bash a pillow or something. :comfort:

Hi all,

Sara - Big hugs for today and for having to organise Reid's cremation. It must be so awful for you, but Im so glad you feel strong. You very much deserve to feel strong and never feel guilty for that. Also, I know it is not the same but at only 12 weeks gestation my milk was there. I was thinking of my baby in the shower on Saturday morning and I saw a few drops of milk dripping. I broke down so bad that DH had to come and see what was wrong. I can only imagine how difficult it would be to deal with your milk coming in and having no baby to feed.:hug:

Hope - I totally understand you needing a break, we will be here for you when you are able to re-join us. :hug:

Telly - I cant believe how incredibly unfair this is for you. Im so sorry. Its ok to pretend if it helps. Hugs always to you my dear friend. :hug:

Keike - How awful for you. You need to keep your baby clothes because you will need them for your own baby. There is no way I will part with my baby stuff, no way, never, even if I never get to use it again. Im sorry you have to deal with this atm. :hug:

MM- :hug:

OP - Im sorry you had to open that bill, I hate getting those reminders that stab you in the heart. I hope today is a better day :hug:

AFM - Feeling a bit better today. I have cleaned my house top to bottom which Ive enjoyed since I was too sick to move for 6 weeks straight. It was DS2s 3rd birthday yesterday and it was very much a bittersweet day. I was so happy he has been in our lives for three glorious years, but at the same time it was hard because of everything that's happened.

Hey ladies. I'm okay. Really. I'm not 100% sure it's a miscarriage.
I was feeling very pregnant. You know that feeling. Even DH mentioned he thought I might be UTD. Got what appeared to be implantation bleeding. Was getting quietly excited. But refusing to do a stick test, as I wanted to hold out as long as possible. Then a couple of days ago my "period" began. Extremely heavy. Cramping. Crazy amounts of clots. Every time I took a step I could feel it coming out.... I'm sure you all know what I'm describing.

But. I never took the test. So I'll never know for certain. Wise words from a bb friend were if I really *wanted* to know. Or if I would rather palm it off as a crazy AF. I decided option two was better for my heart. Today my bleeding is still very heavy, but the clots are not as large. Who knows. If it was, it was early days, 4.5 weeks. My other miscarriages were 9 & 10 weeks

Shelby. No, I don't tell anyone but you girls. I find that awkwardness IRL just isn't worth it. *sigh* You are such an incredibly supportive friend. I'm so lucky to have you xx

Infact... All you girls. Its just so so nice.. so lovely to have an ear there listening. I really appreciate you all. Thank you xx

Keike - wow! so she'll be grandma and a new mum roughly the same time? .. I'm sorry... :hug:

Sara how did today go?

Love to all xx

Telly- Oh, oh. Again my eyes are stinging reading your post. You're right, option 2 is easier on your heart. I'm so sorry you don't have IRL support. I wish I had the money to come up for a visit. You know I'm just a phonecall away though, and thanks to Wonderboy, I'm awake at random times through the night. You call me anytime. We can just sob quietly together, if you like. :hug: On a slightly lighter note, we might wind up TTC together. ;) Bitter-sweet, eh?

Keike- :( Sometimes stuff like this feels like the universe is rubbing salt in our wounds. You must want to scream, and I don't blame you one bit.

Sara- Thinking of you, and sending extra strength :hug:

OP- You seem to have some of your sparkle back, hun. It's so heartening to see, there's so much to feel sad about lately, it seems.

Sorry if I've missed anyone, that was a marathon post on my phone.

Hi Ladies,

Today is the day they will cremate Reid's body. I haven't cried yet but I feel I'm just sittin on the edge.

I'm going through "its just not fair" day I think. I can't help but think how I should almost be 18 weeks and that he should be in m belly kicking around and happy. These thoughts pull at my heart big time. The make me want to go back and have another baby now.

What are all your thoughts on TTC again?

I'm all over the place. One minute I'm thinking about having another baby and the next I'm thinking, maybe I'll just wait and get the remainder of Uni out of the way next year.

We had planned for me to take the year off Uni next year and have baby so thats what part of me thinks we should just do. But then it does make sense to finish Uni now aswell.

I just wish none of this ever happened and I didnt even need to be having these thoughts :cry:

If only this was just a dream....

Thinking of you Telly :hug: