Hi guys, recently my DH and I have decided to TTC #5. All has been going along fine except last night I had a complete panic attack about it not going well at all. I have had 6 pregnancies. 3 progressed succesfully and ended with 4 children. I have had 3 MC but it is the last one before my twins that haunts me. I fell pregnant with twins only to lose them at 10weeks. I then fell pregnant with twins again and after my 2nd scan was called into my OB early and told that one of them had a large haemotoma around it and would most likely not survive. A scan was done and only 1 baby found. I went home absolutely devastated. Then 3 weeks later I had some spotting and was sent straight for a scan, where the sonographer went on to tell me they were BOTH fine. It turns out that I was still pregnant with twins. I don't what happened, but the emotions of it all we had decided even if the pregnancy ended we wouldn't go through the pain again. Well it's been 4 yrs since I had the twins and we are ready for another, well I thought so. Now I am in a complete panic about having a MC, I just don't know if I could manage, even though we really want another baby.
Is this normal to feel so excited about moving forward but also be so scared and panicky?