thread: Scared to poo

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jan 2004
    Central Coast
    434

    Scared to poo

    I have a two and a half year old boy who had toilet training down pat by the age of 2. We started him at 18 months. Just after he turned 2 he got sick and had to take some medication which made him really constipated and doing poo's really hurt him for about a week. Since then we have taken a major step back in that for about 3 months he was completely petrified to use the toilet at all. We introduces a potty which has helped with wee's which he is now doing on the toilet again but I am not having any luck with Poo's. He comes and asks me to put a nappy on him and if I suggest the toilet he gets upset. I don't force this issue as the last thing I want is to traumatise him even more.

    Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can get him to do poo's on the toilet or potty?

  2. #2
    Life Subscriber

    Jul 2006
    Brisbane
    6,683

    Lolly, this is actually really common and not an easy one to overcome. I would pull out every trick in the book myself. First of all, make sure he is getting plenty of water to drink and foods to make it much easier to poo (sultanas and pear juice are fabulous for this). Then have a sticker chart for doing poos on the toilet, and also if necessary, you could try a pressie - either a lolly or a toy, whatever works in your family. Also give him lots and lots of praise when he does do a poo in the toilet.

    He will get over this eventually. Once he has pooed in the toilet a couple of times without hurting he will be fine. I hope it happens soon for you hun. I know how frustrating it can be.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    3,305

    hrmmm thats a hard one is it possible to give jelly beans or some other treat for poo poo's on toilet, Maybe a bribe with a juice while on toilet or maybe read to him on the toilet. My son always took a car and a book to the toilet and we gave him a jelly bean for poo in toilet. Maybe start first with the potty infront of tv with something as a distraction first then progress to toilet. Hope all goes well for you good luck

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jan 2005
    Down by the ocean
    6,110

    I have BTDT with constipation caused by antibiotics (2 weeks at a time cos he kept holding on he was so scared) and the only thing I can recommend is to back right off and wait until he is comfortable pooing while wearing a nappy before even mentioning the toilet.

    I second what MantaRay said about sultanas and pears. You can also try prune juice and a gentle softener like parachoc from the chemist. Stay away from laxatives as they can cause stomach cramps which can make his anxiety worse.

    Poor little fella

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Jan 2004
    Central Coast
    434

    Thanks for the input ladies.

    His poos are nice and loose now. It was only a problem for that week but the pain has been seared into his little brain. I have tried the rewarding with stickers and lollies and also reading a book. These methods were used to get him back on for wees but if I even try to take him near the toilet for a poo he freaks out. I have a feeling that this one is just going to take time. I have had one poo in the potty but I think that was an accident as he went to wee and then came and got me really confused to look in the potty. We made a really big fuss of him when he didn?t but haven?t managed to get him to do it again yet. That was about 6 weeks ago now.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jul 2005
    Vic
    474

    i dont have any advice for you... we are in the same situation with DD. she will do wee's in the toilet but when it comes to poos she crys for a nappy or to go to bed as she sleeps in a nappy. She did one poo in the potty by accident and she freaked out big time, shaking screaming and crying. has also done poop in her nickers twice and had the same reaction. I dont know how to fix it and have just backed right off- nothing has worked for us. Will try again a a couple of months time. Good luck, i really hope you find a solution!

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    Perth - Eastern Suburbs
    391

    We were having trouble with poos in the potty too, got our first one last night , but yet to see if it will keep going.
    Over a period of 3 weeks everytime DS did a poo in his nappy or knickers we would say big boys don't do poos in their nappy/knickers they do poos in the toilet or where do poos go DS? - that's right in the toilet and get him to take the poos to the toilet and flush it.
    He then asked for a particular toy and instead of just getting it as his once a week buy we told him that he could only have it if he did a poo in the potty - placed the toy in a clear sealed container so he could see it and everytime he said I want "xxx toy" we just repeated when you do a poo in the potty.
    The no-cry solution suggests wrapping little prizes and giving them for successes.
    Take them to the potty first thing in the morning and after meals.
    If he asks for a nappy to poo in, make him do it where the potty/toilet is; progress to him sitting on the potty with the nappy on, once he is used to that suggest taking the nappy off and line the potty with the nappy or cut a hole in the nappy.
    Good Luck.