Parenting after Miscarriage or Loss ~ February/March 2010

Thanks Michelle :hug: i think i will need to do just that and have a chat with this little bubba.. i'll put miss a down for a nap and light some candles to help.

Lisa :hug: It is so hard to actually let go but it is so important. They sense the anxiety / tension. If you can, light the candles and sit in a darkened space for a little while. Visualise the tension of waiting for this baby to arrive and the tension of preparing for a VBAC flowing out the bottom of your feet and out your fingertips. Feel the energy flow and as you do, visualise the uterus relaxing and opening like a flower. Like the petals as they open outwards. Do some focused breathing while you are visualising and with each breath out feel the tension leave your body. With each breath in feel a blanket of peace wrapping around you (or you can visualise white light being drawn in and surrounding you). When you are ready - shake your hands and feet to remove the tension clinging to them. Take a few deep breaths yoga style and know that you are ready, relaxed and prepared to accept the path your baby has chosen.

You can do a bath too where you spend some time talking to your baby and enjoying the few last moments of that beautiful belly and the movements inside (assuming you can get out :lol:)

You are ready. You can do this. You are prepared. Now is the time to let go and accept there is nothing more for you to do but wait and trust :hug: Give me a call if you need to chat. I know how hard those days just waiting are :hug:

Lisa I hope your little one make an appearance very soon. Happy EDD too btw ;)

Michelle I'm happy little Omar is being a good boy and letting you know all is ok in there by the more frequent movements. How is everyone else doing at your place?

Sorry for lack of personals atm but I'm feeling awful. I have this stupid cold/flu thing going on atm and can't even bring myself to take a panadol :( On the other side of things it all seems to be going ok I think. M/S is still around with avengence and I'm so so tired and irritable. Poor DH coped an earful last night over the fact he wouldn't decide on something for dinner :redface: Oh well atleast he's getting a break this weekend as he's going away tonight until early hours Monday morning. I'm just hoping everything is ok here while he's away. DS isn't well either..same cold/flu thing as me so he's miserable too.
I'm sorry about the poor me post.

I hope everyone else is ok.

Actually Mako - things here aren't too bad. For the minute ;) I do feel like DH and I are disconnected from each other and him from the pregnancy but it is mainly time related and should be better over the weekend after my dummy spit last night :redface: DD is chit chatting away with more words each day and toddling around happily. DS amazed the nanny the other day when he said hello to a Chinese man in Chinese :rofl: Nick Jnr has a lot to answer for!! Just wait until he speaks to someone in Spanish thanks to Dora and Diego :D

I hope the cold / flu gets better soon but I am very happy you are sick and feeling like crud with the M/S (that is said with love BTW ;))

I am sorry I haven't been posting much. The last few weeks have been incredibly incredibly taxing... I will post all about it later... I just haven't got the head space for it.

Lisa: Your baby & you have a relationship that begun many months ago. Before your body can birth your head has to be in a birthing space. I believe that acupuncture & EPO & sex etc all help. What helps most in my observation and experience is when the Mama can let go. That is a much pedalled term I know.

What I suggest is really spending time with your baby & your body. A bath like Michelle suggested is always good. Being outside with your feet earthed on the ground. Telling your baby & meaning it that you let go & accept when the right time has come for him/her to be born.

"My baby will be born in the perfect time for him/her".

Go inside yourself and really acknowledge any fears, doubts or concerns. Look at them, acknowledge them, do what is necessary to express them and then let go...

Shout to the night sky with shoes off...

Your body will birth this sweet baby when you are ready. Not just your body but your head...

We will all be here to wait, watch, light our candles and hold you energetically. :hug:

LISA _ Oh my, you must be so, so, so, so, so close to bubby coming along now. I'm so excited for you. What's the plan with Miss A when labour starts? Where is she off to? Is she going to see bubs first to announce to everybody a brother or a sister? It's so exciting you are making me cluck!!!

BEK _ Claudy was BF & she too was sleeping through til 5 am, do you think that perhaps maybe Eva doesn't know how to settle herself back down to sleep & feeding is the only way she knows how? I'm not at all saying that's a bad thing, but it sounds like she can't pass from one sleep cycle to another without feeding back into la la land. Maybe you can try rocking her back to sleep for a few nights, then try patting her back to sleep for a few nights? I'm not saying any of this WILL work, but it may not hurt to give it a go?

MICHELLE _ Oooh I love a good pedicure!!! I haven't had one of those in agessssssssssss. I have been painting my own toenails just lately - cos I can reach them superly now :rofl:

KELLY _ So glad you're calming down darl - the joys of daycare hey? How are you travelling now?

JANIE _ Did I read on FB that Daniel is coming home NEXT week??? Serioulsy, you must have some awesome growth hormones happening!! Good on you!!

MAKO _ I hope this cold passes quickly & I can completely understand why you won't even take Panadol. If Sage isn't well too, perhaps some snuggly time watching the cartoons on TV for a few hours will do you both the world of good!

Big hello's to everybody - I have a big weekend approaching which is crazy for me - it's usually dullsville at our place.

Love Jayne xxx

Oooh Lisa - birth is not far away darl, relax & focus on what lies ahead - that beautiful little bundle in your arms!! What's the plan with Miss A on Labour Day?? Is she going to your parents place? Is she the first to see bubby? Will she announce brother or sister to everybody??? I love to know ALL the details. heheeh

MICHELLE _ I am loving the pedicure action! Good on you! I can't remember the last time I got a pedi. I have been doing my own just lately, because now I can reach my toenails with ease to paint them. :rofl:

MAKO _ You poor chook feeling ill, but I can completely understand why you don't want to take anything for it. Maybe some cuddle up time on the couch watching cartoons is what you & Sage both need?

KELLY _ How you going love? How you feeling? Glad you got to re-group on your emotions while Luke was in daycare, it's very easy to become stressed, but not as easy to shake it off. xx

JANIE _ Did I read on FB that Daniel is coming home NEXT week? That is sooooo cool! Your milk must have some mega growth hormones happening in them!

BEK _ Claudia too was sleeping through til 5am at this age, I know Eva's sleep is a continual battle for you, but perhaps she doesn't know how to put herself to sleep unless she feeds to sleep? I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but perhaps you might be able to try rocking her back to sleep during the night for a few nights & when that works, go to patting her to sleep? Just some ideas - cos I honestly don't know how you're still functioning!!!

WILLOW _ I forgot to congratulate you the other week on your shrinking bust! Good on you & now tell me everything you eat so I can copy & hopefully mine can shrink as well!!!

Well AFM I have a busy weekend planned, which is not usually like us, but I'm excited to have something to do. Weekends here are usually dullsville.

Love JS

Jayne - the exact reason for a pedicure (besides the obvious luxury of it ;)) it that it is getting harder and harder to reach my toes without discomfort. Omar doesn't like to get squashed :D

Deb - hang in there :hug: It will get better but there are a few more hurdles to leap (and they will seem like mountains!!) before you are free to move to the next stage :hug: You are doing a great job and holding it together so very well. Be proud xx

MICHELLE _ Are we allowed to know which names you are liking for Omar??? As with the reaching toenails fiasco, I have no Omar to blame - just some really, really warm insulation that was preventing toenail painting - I have finally shed some insulation & can now reach them with ease! heheeh

Well Jayne - there are a few criteria considering the names we have for DS and DD. Both seem to have come from the 1800's so a "modern" name may not fit. Good thing the classic names are fashionable :lol: The other criteria is from DH - it needs to sounds good after a few red wines and roll off the tongue :rofl: Say my little people's names after a few and you will get what he means ;)

So far Henry looked good (but now not permitted - BIL has dibs and they are due just before us :D) we had Charlie but not sure as DH now has it linked to the pre-amnio stress and George seems to be a popular choice. Having said that - we are in no way decided so it could still be anything!!

Ok, old school names - lemme think............. Christian? I actually really like that name myself. Hmmmm, Sebastian? Cos I love Sebby for short :lol: Jack?

Oh & another thing - Charlie now seems to be popular for girls????

Michelle - Have been wondering how you're going! Glad Omar is being good and giving you lots of kicks!! I still need some advice on how to live in the wonderful world of De-Nile.. I'm absolutely TERRIBLE at it!! Ooohhhhh... names, so exciting!!

Jayne - Oh yeah.. daycare was definitely my saving grace this week!! I'm feeling ok, although not really coping as well as I'd like with the pg, I can't stop thinking about it and worrying about what 'might' happen. I wish I could just forget about it and get on with the next few weeks but it's impossible when I'm over here without many distractions. This is when I need to be working.. or something! Oh well.

Deb - Massive hugs hun. I can't imagine what you're going through and admire you so much for your indredible strength.

Mako - Have been wondering how you're going too.. when is your next appointment?? Hope you're feeling a bit better soon (although the m/s is such a good sign... so maybe that can stick around a bit longer.. iykwim!!)

Lisa - Hugs hun.. hope you managed to have a nice, relaxing chat to that little bub of yours and praying it does the trick!! Can't wait to hear some news from you soon.

Willow - How are you and how are the night feeds going?

Spring - How are you?

Janie - I'm so excited that you'll have D home with you soon and am happy to come over and distract N whenever you need!!!

Jo - Are you still out there?? Have been thinking about you and wondering how you're going???

Hello to everyone else that I've missed.

AFM - I'm doing ok. Can't stop thinking about this pg and wondering what will be. It's driving me a little bit mad but I don't have anything else in my life right now to distract me.. and I'm so far from my family. It's hard. But I also know there's nothing I can do and just need to play the good old waiting game. So frustrating. Wish I could just forget it and get on with things. DS has been soooo up and down lately too, he'll go from being the perfect angel, to the most horrible monster.. in a matter of minutes. I know he's a toddler and at that age but it's driving me mad!! He just won't listen to me... I need some respect damn it... LOL. At least I'm not getting quite as frustrated with him atm.. we'll see how long that lasts!!! I'm trying hard.

Oh and I have to share this... I think I've been on here a bit too much lately because every time I get the laptop out, DS runs over and wants to see the little yellow man that waves at him!!!! Took me a while to work out its the little smilie in my signature. LOL. DS just sits there and waves back at him... priceless.

Kel xxxx

Oooohhhhh Jayne.. just noticed your ticker.. it's chugging along VERY nicely!! Impressive!!

:hug: Deb

Michelle I'm sorry but I had to laugh at the criteria for the names ie rolling off the tongue after a few reds :rofl:

Kelly sending you a :hug: too. These early weeks are so hard aren't they. I wish I could press a fast forward button and get us into the 2nd Tri ;)
I had to giggle at your DS wanting to see the little yellow man lol. How cute.
Do you have anything exciting planned for the weekend?

My next scan is on Tuesday afternoon and then if all is well I see my Ob on the 7th April which seems so far away. I haven't seen her for this preg yet though. As for Dr S I need to call him after my scan and let him know all the details and if everything is ok then I don't need to see him again but if its not then I need to have all the tests re done for him. I'm so all over the place atm but really trying to stay positive but am also trying to prepare for the worst too if that makes sense. I mean all the M/S and preg symptoms are so strong but I still have the view in my head from my last scan with Bubs heart rate stopping and starting. Far out this is so tough :(

Ok so I'm having a bit of a quiet weekend which will be nice. DS is out the back playing with his diggers in the dirt lol. He asks to play out there every day and he ends up so filthy dirty hahaha. He's such a boy :rofl: I need to get onto DH to build him a sandpit so he can play in that instead of the little bit of dirt thats out there.

I hope everyone has a great weekend.

Montgomery - I love Monty for a name... It sounds fine after a few... :lol:
Theodore - Theo - uber cool!
Arthur - Artie - one of my favourites too...
Hugh - but I think that's a bit of a popular one...
Francis - I love this name & this is what Immy would have been if she had the male appendage... I even thought of Frances for her...

I definately think Theodore, Hugh or Montgomery are the bomb Michelle! Im sure whatever you do end up picking will be lovely! Another one is Thaddeus nn Thad? I love that one.

Another absolute favourite of mine is Atticus...