KELLY _ BOL for a magnificient scan today. Can't wait to hear all is well. Can you pretty please with a cherry on top text me to let me know all is great? I just don't know when I will get back online?
Ta,
Jayne
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KELLY _ BOL for a magnificient scan today. Can't wait to hear all is well. Can you pretty please with a cherry on top text me to let me know all is great? I just don't know when I will get back online?
Ta,
Jayne
very best wishes today Kelly xx
Kelly How did your scan go?? I've been thinking of you all day :hug:
I hope your brother arrived safely and that he and Luke have a wonderful time together.
Oh and Sage has been calling me "babe" all day lol. Maybe that one might stick around for a bit as he's been calling DH and I by our 1st names a bit lately too :rofl:
Girls I hate to be a downer in here atm (which is why I'm not saying a great deal) but thanks to all who have been asking how I'm doing.
Short answer is I'm not coping well at all.
Longer answer.. I'm all over the place atm and its just easier not to even try and think or talk about it. I know that isn't the best way to deal with things but its the only way I can get through my days atm. Next week will be even worse as I'm back to work then too and my boss has been an absolute cow about things and I have DH in my ear telling me I need to find a new job (which I know I do but tbh I have no idea what I want to do) :wall: As for ttc again or not I'm not sure where we are headed. I think I might just wait to see my Ob next month and see what she has to say. As for Dr S..well I haven't heard anything from him so I guess I can write him off for now :dunno: I'm feeling so very alone with things and don't have anyone close by here IRL to talk too so its just easier not to say anything.
So there you have it :(
Thanks so much everyone for thinking of me.
I've just come back from my scan and I'm so happy to say that everything was perfect!!! I'm in shock I think.. it's amazing. I have been so nervous and stressed today that I gave myself a migraine and now have a killer of a headache.. on top of the cold.. so absolutely feel like crap but am so incredibly happy I cannot even begin to explain it. I'm on a major 'high'.. a feeling I haven't had since Luke was born. There are lots of 'happy tears' thats for sure!! Bub measured 8 wks and 3 dyas today.. so another day ahead what I thought. I just can't believe it. I think its time for a new ticker!!
Mako - I'm so sorry hun.. I thought you were going through a rough time as you weren't really saying anything about yourself (begining to realise that's what you do)!! I know what you mean about just not wanting to go there but please know that we're all here for you, so please, please, please, open up to us when you're ready.. you really do need to get it out. I hope my news isn't too upsetting for you.. I know you'll be happy for me but of course it's going to hit a 'spot' for you aswell and I completely understand that. You've been incredible.
Wow... I'm absolutely exhausted, I can't begin to tell you. Think it will be an early night tonight. My brother arrived safely too and Luke is sooo excited, it's very cute.
Thanks again everyone, I'm so glad (and amazed) I'm able to bring us some good news in here.
Kel xxx
Kelly I'm so happy for you. That is just the best news :dance:
Wooot woooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!! :leap: So happy that your little one is doing so well Kelly!!!! :hug:
Yeah great news Kelly!
Yay Kelly. So happy for you.
Mako - Big hugs babe.Some times doing nothing is the best thing to do until things become clear.
I have a sick bubba. Her temps keep going up and down. This happened on Sunday, then yesterday she was ok, and now this arvo she has another temp.:dunno:
Bek, we're having similar issues with Sam at the moment - one minute he's fine, next minute he's spiking a random temperature out of nowhere and is very unhappy. We have no other signs that there's anything wrong at all, though. It's stressing me out, and I'm starting to think I should get him to the GP, but I kind of know they are just going to say rest and panadol and keep an eye on him. :( Hope your little girl is well again soon.
Kelly - yay! :)
Mako - I'm so sorry to hear that you are down. Really disappointed in the way Dr S is being - that's so not like him at all.
Must dash - dinner is about to burn in the oven.
BW
Kelly: that is just so wonderful.
Sorry, just not up to persies. My heart is very heavy tonight thinking about Michelle. :(
Great news Kelly xx
Spring hugs babe.
kelly, so happy for you! When is your next scan?
Mako, so sorry that you are having a difficult time. I think waiting to talk to your doctor is a good idea. Please come in here and vent some feelings when you are ready.
Kelly - great news hun!! I am so glad to hear it, you must be so relieved!! Love your ticker :)
mako - you know, I was going to PM you tonight because you haven't mentioned much about yourself lately and I have been wondering how you are going. I have been thinking of you hun. I understand that you must be feeling lost and hurt at the moment. I wish there was something I could do. Sounds like a good plan to wait for your OB appointment but I know how hard it can be not knowing where to go from here? I really wish Dr S had been of more help to you. I thought he wanted all the tests re-done again so I had thought that would be the next step, to see if anything comes up. Sounds like you have a good OB so I hope they will have a plan for you. Big :hug: hun.
Deb - so sorry to hear about FOTY playing silly buggers again. I can't believe he is doing what he is doing - involving the kids really is dirty tactics. I hope you have him out of your life soon love. How is the settlement going?
Michelle - thinking of you hun and sending all my strength x
jayne - looking forward to meeting you when you get back! I will PM you to try and arrange a time and place.
willow - good luck with those renos!! I know what a PITA it is with kids, but it will all be worth it in the end!
Sending a big hello to everyone else. Sorry for another quick post, it is hard to find time to post while I am in Perth. We are having a wonderful time but there are so many people to catch up with that I am flat out!! Have a funeral to go next week as my Great Aunt just passed away which was very sad.
Mako - oh hun, everything is so crappy right now - go easy on yourself - men for the most part just don't get it - now is probably not the time to beat yourself up on new jobs etc, but then again, would a new job/change be a good thing? Start thinking about what you would 'like' to be doing, be selfish and think about yourself girl. It's been an extra horrible time for you, and I know you are feeling for Michelle on top of your own grief, depression can set in so easily (I know), it's tough to find a way out of it, I guess step by step hon xoxoxoxo
Kelly - lovely lovely lovely and we are all a bit relieved for you too, and feeling the warmth of some good news in here xoxo nice ticker too :D
Spring - are your little men better? I understand completely how you are feeling, and I wish there was some way to protect Michelle from all that pain, but I know it's a journey she cannot avoid .
Loosing a husband is such an incredibly life changing event, I can't begin to tell you how much in infiltrates everything. Here I am, 8 years on - DH and I attend a parents workshop for year 7 parents tonight - we are all asked as a group "what kind of stresses kids are under these days" (while everyone is answering things like bullying, good results, peer pressure) I'm thinking the death of her father was pretty bl--dy stressful, and the emotional fallout huge - in fact as the kids get older, and they mature, they start thinking about it more, and asking more questions - so it just never goes away. I have always drummed into them try and make their Dad proud of them, and to follow in his footsteps. We have many many CD's he wrote/sang/produced, so we are very lucky to have his ideas and passions come through in his music. He once held up one of his CDs and announced to me "my grandchildren will know me through my music" - and what a beautiful legacy he left.......
Sorry, got a bit carried away then - but the point is, Michelle is going to need support and understanding for the rest of her life - you'll be amazed at how much she will appreciate you remembering an anniversary, Greg's birthday, just anything that was special to her. I find my wedding anniversary (2nd April) comes around and I don't hear from one person (I used to hear from his parents, but they don't bother now as I should be over it remember) - I know a wedding anniversary is a personal thing, but I would love someone to acknowledge it in some way. Now I'm definately waffling and should get to bed.....
Love to all, Lee xoxo
Lee - ((hugs)) I truly believe the universe has brought you and Michelle together for a reason, and to help teach each of us some major life lessons. You are an amazing woman and I thank you for sharing your experience and Chris with us.
Kelly - WOOT Honey - thats fabulous news, so happy and proud of you xx
Spring - I know hun :hug:
Deb - how are things with DD?? Is she home, is she safe?? I cant even begin to imagine how hard this is for you.
Quick question - is it too early to change Natalya's *routine* - she is a day sleeper so we are up all night... and any advice on how best to do this?? I didnt have this issue with Miss A so im learning something new about motherhood... SLEEP DEPRAVATION... and Bek honey i just want to say you are amazing, you have been doing it for so long with Eva, you deserve a medal and a good nights sleep!
BBL,
Lis xx
Lisa - thanks - Flynn was very much a day sleeper, night waker the first month. My other babes were just the same. It generally will pass at about 1 month - new babies have no idea of day or night, plus it takes their little internal clocks that time to adjust - so although tough, it is normal. I think Flynn started sleeping longer at night 4-5 weeks, just when you are getting desparate, they change! Hang in there hon, she will sort it out soon.
Deb - I'm hoping you are okay hon, what's the latest, have things settled at all? As if you don't have enough on your plate...xoxoxo
Michelle - love and strength to you, tomorrow will be the full gammet of emotions, it's a day you should never had to plan. I'm sure you will have made Greg's farewell beautiful, and a fitting tribute to the man you love. Give Oscar and Lily a special cuddle from the bb girls, and whisper a special hello to baby George. It's heartbreaking that your babies have lost their Daddy, massive massive hugs xoxoxoxoxo
Well my MIL left this morning, and it was a case of ' what the bl..dy hell was that about' as I'm left with a mountain of washing and cleaning. Urgh, I know I complain about this, but I'm sick to death of family coming to 'help' and just making things worse for me. Seriously, she even sat at the table and expected to be waited on :o whilst I'm running around with 2 babies and a million other jobs. Next time we get asked to cater for others, I'm seriously going to think again - I knew I should have brought that sign for the door I saw, it said 'FRIENDS WELCOME, FAMILY BY APPOINTMENT" lol, at least I can still have a laugh - now back to "normal", solo and bluffing my way though.....
Lee xoxoxo
Lee -I hope you get a chance to catch up. My IL's have been the same in the past. They are good now and help out more because my DH has laid down the line that I am not a servant to them and if they come to our place they can make their own coffee or take the kids for a bit.
Lisa - How is Miss A? Has Miss N got her day and night mixed up? Here are some suggestions: Start waking her up a the same time each morning by letting light into her room, when she is awake but her in a bouncer near a window or take her outside for some light, for day sleeps don't make her room overly dark.
At night do a bath, feed and maybe a massage then bed. Only sing her a certain song for night time sleep. During night feeding don't fuss over her, get the feed done and keep lights low. Eventually she will get it. Most bubs get day/night thing by the 12 week mark.
Hugs hun..BTW Due to sleep deprivation, I have never looked so bad, and been so disorganized in my life. The night Eva sleep through will be a God sent and I will be booking myself into a dayspa to celebrate
BW - How is Sam? Eva ended up with 40c temps last night. She has an ear infection
Sorry I haven't been around the last few days, renos and crapola everywhere have made it hard to reach the PC!
New flooring is in now so hopefully I can start putting everything back in it's place tomorrow. I hate renos.
Kelly - WOOOOOOOOT!! I'm so relieved to hear everything went well yesterday :hug: You must be on cloud nine.
Mako :hug: I'm thinking of you often. Gotta say I agree with DH about the job, but that's no news to you ;) I think it/she brings you down more than anything and I think a fresh start would be wonderful for you. What about same job but different place?
Bek - Hope Eva is feeling better soon. Sleep can't be good with an ear infection! I'm hearing you about the sleeping through. After about 5 nights of sleeping well with only 1 wake up, last night was a shocker again. But my mum was here and DH had training and our evening routine was all out of whack. I'm praying that's all it was!
Lisa - Agree with the girls re night sleep. She just needs to work out night from day and circadian rhythms don't kick in till around 6 weeks. So not long to go!
Well I put my baby girl and my mum on the train today for her big adventure to Nanny and Poppy's house. I bawled like a baby when I dropped them off and so did poor L :( He wanted to go on the train with Nanny too! She was busting at the seams with excitement so I will not allow myself to be too sad about it. Stomach will probably remain in knots until I hear they have arrived safely this afternoon. We are driving up on Friday to pick her up so it's only 2 nights.
I saw my Nan again yesterday and her deterioration in a week and a half was a shock to me :( We are all now praying that the end is not far off for her. She is suffering and it is so awful for everyone :crying:
Wow, Bek! I hope Eva is ok - we haven't had anything near that bad, and so far today no fevers, but he did have one dose of panadol when he just wouldn't settle to sleep this morning and was grizzling like he was in pain. It's weird, though - so runny nose, no sneezes, no cough. No red ears and he's not pulling at them as though they are sore, he can still be very loud and vocal so I doubt it's a sore throat. His balance is fine so I doubt it's a middle ear infection, and he has no weird rash. There's just no sign of anything being wrong with Sam apart from these random fevers - but it's very much an intermittent problem. The only other sign of illness was a massive spew at lunch time yesterday, and a seriously dodgy nappy today - but it could all come down to teething... only that appears to have all stopped! A week ago he had mushy spots on the bottom and hard lumps on the top with all four molars - now we've had one corner of one top molar erupt, the other has retreated and the bottom mushy spots are gone. Most of the time he seems normal and happy, just slightly off his food so I feel a bit funny about taking him to a GP at the moment, but it is all a bit of a mystery.
Willow, I'm hoping that the sleep thing improves once more and that you cope ok without your little girl. I'm sure she feels all grown up now!
Lee - I hate having family stay for that very reason. My parents are ok - they cook, they clean, they keep their stuff very, very contained... My in-laws... totally different story! I hope you're able to catch up fairly quickly.
I really must get back into reports - urgh! At least it's a small job this time as it's just year 12 and there's only a dozen kids in my class... I just have no motivation! And Sam had his first hair cut today - he looks so incredibly grown up now!
BW
Can I please be completely selfish and ask a question? Anyone can can answer, if they know what I'm talking about! My Ob is sending me for BTs, JIC we have any future pregnancies. I didn't ask him at the time what he was testing for, just agreed it was a good idea. Now I'm looking at the slip, and wondering what these things are.
Lupus A/C - I've seen this Lupus anitcoagulant thingie mentioned on bb, but don't really understand it
ANA - have seen this mentioned too, but have no idea
The last one I can hardly read, it looks something like - Anticardialpin something-or-other. I know that's not it, it's just what it looks like LOL!
If anyone can explain these for me I would be immensely grateful :)
Michelle, thinking of you always my love, but particularly in the lead up to Greg's funeral tomorrow :hug:. I will be there with you all in spirit.
Willow, :hug: I hope your Nan doesn't suffer too much more :(
Lots of love to EVERYONE else, I feel bad that I'm not posting, but life is frantic, especially with all the feeding jazz we have going on. I am definitely reading though, and thinking of you all.
xoxo
Janie ANA is what I have and it is the reason I take low dose asprin but now looks like I need to take Clexane or heparin(sp) injections IF there are any future pregnancies for DH and I.
The Lupus A/C is anti coagulant I think and I've been tested for this also but not too sure about what it is. Sorry not too much help am I :( I might have these around the wrong way or mixed up so please don't quote me on it. Michelle gave me some info on these tests last time I had them done(I've been tested about 3 times now) and still don't have too much to go on :(
Michelle gave me some info via a text a while back so maybe when she is feeling up to it she might be able to give you some info too :hug:
BBL as I need to get ready to go out for dinner.
Jane, the lupus anticoagulant thing is something that I may or may not have... it's got nothing to do with lupus - it's actually a clotting disorder (meaning the blod clots too much) and it is treated with low-dose aspirin and prednisone (which is the reason we can't confirm one way or the other whether it's actually a problem - because of being on prednisone or some other immune-suppressing drug for the arthritis).
From memory, the ANA is anti-nuclear antibodies. It's an auto-immune thing, but I don't know all that much about it - just that it was something my rheumy would test for often in trying to get a definite diagnosis for my arthritis.
It seems that your OB is doing the general work up around clotting and auto-immune factors that cause issues in pregnancies. Most of the time they lead to miscarriages, but can lead to problems later in pregnancy as well. If they find anything it will likely mean that future pregnancies will mean you have to take something like aspirin, clexane or prednisone or a combination of those.
I am working from memory here - and it's possible that I've got things a little bit messed up, but I'm sure that Deb or Michelle can straighten out the specifics for you.
I just recently flooded the laundry and kitchen while Sam is currently refusing to have an afternoon nap - it's all happening here!
BW
Just popping in quickly before I go to bed because I keep forgetting to say:
Mako - Dr S is away on holidays atm and has been for a few weeks as far as I know. Not making excuses for him, but just wanted to let you know that he is away (overseas I think).
Just also wanted to drop a big :grouphug: in preparation for tomorrow.
Michelle - I am thinking of you and the children and sending you all my love and strength as you say goodbye :hug: I will have my candles lit tomorrow.
Thanks for the info Willow ;)
I hope you are feeling ok with your DD away with your parents. Did they have a good train trip?
Bek Poor DD having an ear infection :( OUCH!!! I hope the temps have dropped and you all get some much needed sleep tonight :hug:
Deb Any news on your DD? I hope she is home with you :hug:
Michelle I'm thinking of you and am sending you loads more :comfort: :hug: for tomorrow and the days ahead.
Duh! Talk about slow brain... For some reason I never connected the fact that Hollybolly's OB, Dr S was our Dr S... but yes, he is away - from memory he returns either Thursday or Friday, so hopefully you will hear from him soon, Mako. The only time he was ever slow in getting back to me was because he was away. And happy birthday, too.
It's a very, very, very slow brain today. :redface:
BW
No she isn't home Mako... She has moved in with her father, his girlfriend (my once very close friend) & her 4 children aged 7-3. She has said she doesn't care how hurt & upset I am "I"ve got what I wanted - daddy"...
So, I am not sure how to get up from this. I cannot breathe. The pains in my chest hurt so much & my eyes cannot cry anymore. He is trying to allege I am an unfit mother. This is like a nightmare that I can't wake up from. I guess for some reason this is my journey. But I am so tired of the pain that I really don't think I can take any more of it.
To all the wonderful members of our thread.
Tomorrow Michelle, Oscar, Lily & their family & friends will say goodbye to their Greg. Their husband & father. A goodbye that I still cannot fathom they are having to say.
When I really needed Belly Belly many of you lit a candle & sent away positive thoughts, prayers & affirmations. Tomorrow please do that for Michelle & her kids & Greg.
Just light a candle & send your prayer/thought for this beautiful family to the wind - I know she will hear it. xxx
Michelle, I have been thinking of you everyday.
Janie, the Anti-cardiolipin antibodies also cause clotting issues. It sounds like you are having all of the "usual" tests for blood clotting. I had all of these tests done and many many more. All came back normal. My doctor and I still feel like taking clexane was the right thing for me. I really hope you get some answers.
Deb, I cannot even imagine how difficult this time is for you. I hope things get easier for you soon.
Lee, I'm glad that you finally have your house back. I am sorry that your mil wasn't more help or any help at all.
Deb - As a mother, I cannot imagine what you are going through right now. But my sister left home in very bad circumstances when she was 15. She didn't ever return :( I was only 12 at the time and didn't understand all that was happening, only that it broke my father's heart and nearly tore our family apart. Her relationship with my parents was strained for a few years but things did improve and their loving relationship eventually returned. It is a very difficult time but don't lose hope. You are her mother and she loves you like no other. She knows that. She is hurting and confused and angry. She just needs time. For your sake, it hope not too much. I hope the other children are coping OK with their big sister gone, I remember it was a very scary time for me :comfort:
sending my love for Michelle, i will hold you in my heart tomorrow
My candles are lit for Michelle, Greg and the kids. Today is a very sad day :(
deb: :comfort:
Mine too Michelle - just love again Michelle, cuddles & so much support. :hug:
Michelle I'm sending you all the love and strength I can right now. My candle is also lit.
Massive :hug: to you and your children.
Deb I'm sorry your DD is staying with her father. I really do hope she comes to her senses sooner rather than later. I hope you are coping as well as you can under these circumstances :hug:
Lee I hope you're doing ok too. Sending you a :hug: too.
Willow I'm sorry I didn't post earlier about your Nan but I do hope she isn't suffering too much. I hope she has people to help her manage her pain relief and I'm sure she really does cherish your visits :hug:
I just want to say "thanks" to those of you who sent birthday wishes to me yesterday ;)
The best part of all was opening a card from my Nan who is 89 years old and blind to see that for the 1st time in about 10 or 11 years she actually wrote in the card herself :clap: which made me cry as soon as I saw her writing. She usually gets either my mum or aunty to write on the cards but this one is extra special to me.
Anyway that's enough from me on this extremely sad day.
Michelle - I'm thinking of you constantly as you and the kids prepare for an incredibly difficult day. My prays are with you and your family.
Janie - They are all the same tests I had done.. and I cam back positive for the ANA part of the test... as the girls said, they're all tests that are 'associated' with a blood clot disorder (that my Mum actually has), so if you do ever consider having any more kids, it's very good to know if you have any of them! Pretty standard tests I think and I'm extremely grateful that my OB over here did them (my OB in Perth wasn't interested in doing ANY testing).. I don't think I'd have this bub growing nicely if it wasn't for the asprin!
Sorry guys, I'm feeling extremely 'flat' today thinking about Michelle and the kids. It's just not fair. DS didn't sleep very well last night either, so pretty tired.
Sending lots of love and prayers Michelle's way for today and the next few weeks.. I imagine it will be difficult once everyone starts going back to their 'normal lives'.
Kel xxx
Janie my love thankyou for your message last night. I was in a puddle of tears & I felt like there was someone there for me when it arrived - thankyou.
The tests are all to do with clotting disorders as some of the others said. I will link you to some info. Basically when there is IUGR it is sometimes caused by a disorder such as these.
Very basically... At conception the placenta begins to form - many people erroneously believe it happens a few weeks down the track. But the miracle of pregnancy is that it's all laid out - so when there is a disorder that affects clotting sometimes the placenta doesn't form so great. It is thought the intricate "plumbing" or "wiring" of the placenta isn't as healthy - so therefore it doesn't last as long. Thus you get an IUGR & an early delivery or a still birth.
It is for this reason that low weight molecular heparin (such as Clexane or Fragmin etc) is injected sometimes commencing in the TWW. This assists with laying "the ground work" of the placenta & supporting as best as possible the pregnancy.
I hope tht helps. Fire away if you have any more questions & if I can answer them I will. xxx
Deb - I can't imagine the heartbreak you are feeling. I am so sorry that a wonderful woman and mum has to endure this pain.
Willow - I was just thinking about your Gran yesterday. I hope she isn't suffering hun
Michelle - My heart is so heavy for your today.
Mako - I got a handwritten Christmas card from my Grandma last year and I will treasure it for so long.
Hugs to all. I know we are all feeling a little bit of Michelle's pain today.
Michelle, I am holding your hand all day and thinking of you as you say farewell to your darling husband :hug:. Anytime you need a hug, please feel me supporting you, I am there with you in spirit :hug:
Thank you everyone :). I figured they were standard tests, my Ob said it was 'tying up loose ends'. So I was sure there would be people in here who knew about them! I did a limited amount of reading on Dr Google last night, and I plan on doing some more, as the ACA stuff rang some bells for me. I need to look up my BT results from when I had my allergies diagnosed, as it talked about similar stuff. I'm no medico though, so don't really know what I'm looking for. I still think it's unlikely that we will have more children, but I always say "never say never!". And sometimes these things are out of our hands anyway :o
And Deb, you are more than welcome. I'm not saying what I said because of my own experience........I firmly believe that Ruby will 'come back' to you, needing her mum. Obviously I have no idea when, she will need some time, and it will feel endless to you. I also feel that her father will discover soon enough how difficult it is to parent on your own, especially a teen, and there may be issues with MSS too ;). It will all seem rosy at the start, but that won't last...........and Ruby will want to know that you're there for her (which of course you will be :)).
I will light a candle shortly, and will be thinking of Michelle, Greg, their beautiful children and their families at 11.
Michelle Its just after 11am and I'm sitting here with my candle lit and tears streaming down my face as I think of you and your family at this moment :hug:
I am wandering around aimlessly, don't quite know what to do with myself. My candle is burning strongly, I've never seen the flame so active. Greg is with you Michelle, he will be always :hug: