I'm feeling so overwhelmed at the moment.
Neither girl sleeps through the night (unless they are in our bed) and when they are it's a sleepless night for me at least (DH seems to be able to sleep through it all). Despite all my best efforts, I still can't get them to sleep until late (lately it's 11pm before they crash). I have tried countless things to change this but I feel like none of it works. But thats another story (I have gone to tresillian and hated it so please don't suggest that....)

I'm currently working 4 days in what lately has been a quite stressful job (usually it isn't too bad). I am doing some study via distance but that has fallen by the way side a bit of late.
I'm struggling. I'm stuggling with the stress of my job that I normal love. I feel guilty because when I come home I'm tired and just don't have the energy to do much. The girls are tired because they have been in care all day and the current behaviour is sending me insane. The attitude, the lack of any form of respect.
DD1 said to me today "mum, all you do is tell at us. Why do you alway yell?? Me - i burst into tears because she is right. LAtely, all i have done is yell. I hate myself for that. I hate that it's taken for my 4year old to say that for me to recognise whats happening.

I feel anxious all the time. I feel like I have so much stuff that is unsettling happening around me that I just feel anxious, scared even.

Throw in there that my job for what we do is crap pay and right now all I need is to win some money. I have just had to fork out for a unexpected dentist bill of which the dentist has scarred me for life and added to my anxiety about what she has done. The girls are changing daycares so i have had to fork out for the bond, swimming fees are due, cc bill is due (a whole other vent). I just feel overwhelmed... with everything.

My house, well I have washing piled everywhere that needs to be put away, I need to dust and clean my bathroom and kitchen. I don't cope well with clutter and mess so yet another thing I feel anxious and guily about.

I have booked some supervision for work, but does anyone have any suggestions on how to manage it all? Surely I'm not the only one who has felt like this???? Although right now thats how i feel. I know some of this stuff I need to just let go, but I can't. I can't just let it go because it's going to take me forever to get back to where i should be with it all.

Anyone????