Thanks sweetheart, but mummy can wipe her own bum!
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Thanks sweetheart, but mummy can wipe her own bum!
I say this alot! Or 'no, thanks baby, DS doesn't need you wiping for him'.:
Put the toilet paper back in the toilet! DD3 has a pretty gross fascination with the toilet... She's finally growing out of it!
:
Leasha, if there was anything wrong with drinking bath water, my kids would have carked it long ago!
Adding to the licking theme...
This was said to DD yesterday after we had been out at the shops and she had been walking around.
"Do not lick stuck on food off the bottom of your shoes" eeewwwww gross...
Some of these are hilarious! The only one I can think of is 'Please don't stand on the bunny, she doesn't like it very much.'
So funny!
Mine are " Please dont eat the bunnies poo" " Don't drag the bunny by the ears he dosent like it" "Please dont lick the floor" and " No the bunny dosent want to eat right now" (as my DD forces bunnies head into the bowl)
Today 'please don't fold up the chair while your sister is sitting in it'
"please dont tell me you are eating chewing gum that you found under the table in the food court!!""
yup he was!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
please stop biting your own toenail and eating them
(same son who ate the chewing gum)!!
please dont tell me you just did a poo in that sand pit bucket toy outside!!
(yup same child as above)!!!
apparently his twin sister told him to do it!!
and please dont tell me where you wiped your bottom after you did the poo in the bucket!!
"Why is there a raw potato in your bedside table??"
(his twin!!)
If you are going to feed the dog your rusk please do so, don't share licks with the dog.
Hahaha this thread is hilarious! Will have to wait and see what happens with DD.
"No, I will not smack your bottom. No, I will not smack really hard. I don't want to hear that you love it, I am not going to do it."
He can't yet read Janet and John, but people say that 50 Shades is less taxing than those to read, so I do wonder...
Another from the other day:
"Sweetie, I know you're just trying to help but next time you do a poo in your knickers, come and get me. Please don't roll it out onto the floor then scoop it up in a tissue" (said to DD1 as she handed me a fresh 'steamer' in a tissue :sick: )
:rofl: OMG, sorry, I can imagine how horrid it was but that is absolutely hilarious!:
Tauren I am cracking up right now thats hilarious! Shouldnt be 'kids sya the darndest things' it should really be 'kids make YOU say the darndest things'
A few years ago
'The dog is eating your poo?' cough, gag, splutter ...'well DD1 if you poo in his food bowl he will think its for him to eat' ...gag some more :sick:
Yep, warm poo wrapped in a tissue delivered to me in the kitchen sure made my day :rolleyes: It's certainly a story I'll be telling at her 21st!
Oh, poo in the dogs bowl, now that's a ripper!
Rotfl! So much to look forward too :-)
"no, darling, we don't eat people's pets."
"Please quack quietly"
LMAO!!!:
PMSL i love this thread!!
Poo eating and playing along with licking is the major themes!
"...Please do not let your sister lick your bum...even if you are being cats...."
:shakehead:
Please don't wipe your brother's bare bum and then stick the wipe in your mouth!!
Please don't touch your brother's penis. That's his.
I know his balls are floating in the bath, but please don't touch them.
Please don't feed your brother muesli bar (at 4 days old).
Please don't stick your toe in your brother's eye. It makes him sad.
Please don't lick your toe.
overheard: "Just because it fits there, doesn't mean we have to put it there"
scenario involved young boys, a penis and a belly button.
:rofl:
HAHA ohh dear:
Ha ha!!
I was talking to my friend on the phone next thing she says to her 2 and half year old " no darling daddy's shoe is not a potty..."
"No little man, do not hit your sister with a whale shark!"
"No bub, you're right, sharks don't have legs! Yes that is silly!" after we saw a guy in a shark suit walking around waving to kids at the aquarium the other day.
"Yes, my love, one day when you're older, you will have boobies. But by then Baby Brother won't need boobie milk any more so you won't be able to feed him".
Oh wow this conversation was cute. She so dearly loves her brother and loves the idea of being able to breastfeed him. One of those things that's so adorable, I would usually write it down to share with them later... But I don't think the idea of one sibling breastfeeding the other is ever going to elicit an "awwww" from either of them. Just an "ewwwwwwww!!!".
Most amusing - but I do wish more boys were taught this lesson! Would solve most of the world's problems.:
'Hold still so I can get the smartie out your nose' said to dd2 tonight