Mutual trust and respect. Show, don't tell. Offer and give freely and often without expectation. Stop before saying no, figure out if there is a way to make yes work instead. Don't direct or alter what is already unfolding, get out of the way and watch, listen, marvel, appreciate. It takes 5minutes to clean up spilt milk or make a different sandwich or read another book but a lifetime to mend a broken soul so tread gently and let go of what can be let go (and it is a whole lot more than you think that can be). Be open to new ideas or solutions, especially if they're coming right out of your own child's mouth. Own your mistakes, apologize. Don't wait for a new day to reset the moods of the house, let the sun rise in your heart right now and begin better choices straight away. Don't let being right get in the way of being happy, you have the ability to end power struggles as much as your child does so don't expect them to back down if you can't.
The mutual trust and respect is the biggest part. Learning to trust my children is the hardest yet most rewarding process I've gone through.
It is quite similar to how I was raised though also quite different. Standing on the shoulders of giants though definitely, moving in the same directions.
I've definitely decided I wouldn't be as strict as my parents on back chatting/standing up for yourself.
I was never allowed to stand up for myself & still struggle with it. My kids will not be door mats.
They still need to show respect, but they're able to assert themselves.
There's a very fine line somedays, but I think we're doing ok.
And making sure they can talk to me. About anything at all. Something else I still can't do with my own mother.
Others might be of the oppinion that I'm a push over, or taking the 'friend' approach, but they can all bite me. IMO we're doing just fine. These people usually have less children & they're alot younger than mine too...
help my children learn and do for themselves
be gentle, positive, enthusiastic and engaged as a parent
raise adults who are 'good' people and always do the best they can
Be constantly evolving in my parenting style
I think fairly similar to how I was brought up really. I have asked my mum before how to do what they did so my kids could end up being like the three of us in many aspects - but she doesn't know what they did :-).
We show anger at times with yelling and tantrums (us and kids). This is always followed by apology.
We show a sense of fun and adventure by doing things spontaneously at times and letting the routine go. This is followed up by routine that we all need to stay focused and our home organised.
We discuss and spend time together and try to have as much "switched off" time as possible. This is tempered by times when we all need to tune out and chill out and need our screen time.
We show so much love and that envelops everything we do. Our kids know we love them because we tell them, we show them, we kiss them, we encourage them and we discipline them and our parenting style might be a bit of this and a bit of that but it seems to work because generally speaking our kids are polite, happy, and well behaved poppets who are developing their own wicked sense of humour and self and they can see we are human and have faults but we all support and love each other.
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What defines your style of parenting?
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