i feel so unattached to this baby growing inside me and it just makes me wanna cry i just want the baby to be here so ican feel something i dont know wat to do
Honey Im the same. Sadly Im very blurgh to this little baby that was sorta planned (we wanted to TTC in 2011 but were doing nothing to stop getting preg) where as I never had an issue bonding with my unborn surprise babies. Its hard to feel ok talking about and I have a hard time remembering that this is normal.
I've felt the same on & off through this pregnancy. It was planned, but happened quite quickly and then I questioned whether it was the best 'plan' to make. I've got an almost 2yo & am dreading some aspects of having 2 in 2 years. But I remember it was a process of bonding with the first. And for all the stress caused (she has always been a really, really, really bad sleeper), I now can say whole-heartedly that even if I could go back, I wouldn't change a thing with her. I assume the same will happen with this one...
TBH, there will probably be days through the pregnancy, & then even after the bub is born, that you'll feel detached from them. But there will be more days when you love them. A lot of it has to do with how much energy you have - so take care of yourself & I think you'll find that the better you feel yourself, the better you'll feel in relation to the bub
I'm so sorry you're feeling so down. I hope you start feeling better soon, or at least the baby is not far off, so you can look forward to holding your little one. Pregnancy is really such a hard thing to go through, you have no idea how it will make you feel, what emotions you will endure. Maybe take the last few weeks to focus on yourself, get some really good rest, get your haircut, etc, pamper yourself, and then hopefully it will cheer you up, and get you prepared for your little bubba. all the best
i just had a thought to, could it be as you are so close to the end the reality of it is all sinking in, or not hitting yet? i remember with dd i wasnt sure i would know how to love a girl (as if its realy diffrent to boys) hope its just a case of it all feeling to surreal like its not realy happening, after all it is a hard concept to get your head arround, one day you have a big belly, the next you have a bub.
your great for having made it this far not knowing!!! i wouldnt be able to cope i would have gone nuts, i was paranoid at the end with dd they got the pic wrong on the scan and she was a third boy, it got to the point i ended up with 2 hospy bags, one girls and one boy! once you know and can get the definate coulors im sure you will have a great bond. xxx
take heart, take five, spend time out for yourself, if it makes you happy, spend some time daydreaming about what it will be like when they're here ...
but don't beat yourself up about it, because it's easy to feel this way.
It seems just from the replies here that you're certainly not alone.. chin up chicky.. it's good to talk about the difficult things.. get it off your chest.
First baby you kinda feel really bonded and so in love with your baby and that is the only kind of love you have ever known as a mum with a child and then that baby is born and you find out what love really is and your heart has to stretch to fit in the love you feel so then when you are preg with number 2 you feel like you are less in love with that baby than you were the first but really its just the same as you had with your first before they were born, you just dont realise it....I really hope I've written that so it makes sense!
The love will come, maybe at birth or it might take a while, either way is ok and there is no need to feel any guilt, just keep sharing and talking and you will get there.
I think maybe spend some time in your babies room and I can understand that it would be hard not knowing your babies gender but just sit and relax, shut your eyes and imagine doing things with your baby, sitting and breast or bottlefeeding, which ever you will do, bathing your baby and maybe just sit and massage your belly with some cream and sing and talk to your belly. Maybe go and have a pregnancy massage and even have a little baby shower, I know its your 2nd so you mightnot want to go the whole way but maybe just a morning tea and girly movie as a last chicks thing before baby comes and just say no gifts, maybe make a belly cast or go for a 3d scan, all of these things might help you bond I hope something I've said has helped!
Hun, I felt like that. I still kinda do & she's on her way! Its only been the last week or so I've actually thought about the tiny baby cuteness. Before that it was 'what am I doing to myself??'
It is scary, but you will feel better xx
Reply With Quotei hope you feel better soon, once you have bub and can hold your bundle, it will make the world melt arround you. take care and rest up.
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Feeling Detatched =[
) hope its just a case of it all feeling to surreal like its not realy happening, after all it is a hard concept to get your head arround, one day you have a big belly, the next you have a bub.
No advice sorry
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JwithJ :hugs:
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