Thanks guys, for the concern and information.

I’m still not sure where I stand on this. But just knowing in my mind that I can choose to refuse them if it comes down to it, is getting me along for the moment. I haven’t decided to change midwives yet – and haven’t discussed with my doula. But I am coming to terms better with the measurement. My course of action at the moment is:

1) I am eating healthier and somewhat reducing quantities of what I eat (not to a huge extent, but not having a free-for-all like I was prior to this wake up call)
2) Discuss with doula whether to refuse the measurement and whether to change midwives, or whether I am basing this on a once-off meeting
3) Possibly get DH to do a rough measurement for me and if I’m still measuring over the scale for the next appointment, I will refuse to get it done (unless I have any of the other symptoms to be concerned about for excess fluid / GD)
4) Meet with midwife again at the next appointment so I can decide (along with doula’s advice) whether to continue care with her

I really don’t think changing midwives is going to change the course of action if I am measuring over 3 times in a row – it is just hospital policy and my previous midwife who I was happy with would have done the same thing (although perhaps was a little more flexible?). It may change some of my other perceptions about her attitude to birth, though, so I will keep an open mind about whether or not to ask to change.

The problem is, now that it has been implanted in my head that we’re already big, the damage is kind of done. So it would be really nice to be able to have a “normal” measurement and be reassured that everything is on track. But I can’t guarantee that this is going to happen, so I know I really need to understand that I can birth the baby that I am creating (refusing to use the words “big baby”) and make sure that those around me agree that I can do it too.

If excess fluid is diagnosed, what are the steps following this – does it change anything?

If the high measurements continue and I have a late ultrasound and the baby is big, I can see the doubt creeping into everyone’s mind that I can birth him / her – but what else is having that ultrasound going to tell me?

What is also confusing me is that exactly 2 weeks prior I had my 20 week ultrasound and all baby’s sizing was within normal limits. I can’t imagine how things changed that quickly. Either that or they are more generous with the baby’s sizing than the fundal height charts?