Sharing your due date, and news that you're in labour

[TreeTops]

I'd love to hear your experiences/opinions of sharing your due date with people, plus who you told (if anyone) that you'd gone into labour.

I have seen first hand and heard many stories of people going over 40w and getting hounded by calls, texts, emails, etc.

I'm tempted to give people either a vague date eg "end of March, early April", or a fake date, maybe a week later. Is that just silly and deceptive?

And what about labour? I don't think I want anyone waiting in the corridors. Is it OK to tell people once it's all over?

TIA

[Lulu]

I never tell people I'm in labour at all, only those that are there at the time know!

The last thing you need is impatient people texting you in labour....

[Heaven]

I have been trying not to tell ppl my due date but they're so nosey. When they ask I just say mid february but then they say 'What date?' Don't know what you're supposed to say to that.
I don't want visitors too early either so I think I'll just be telling everyone when it's over.

[*star*]

Hi Tree Tops,

I gave my real due date when telling people, but I don't think there's any harm in being vague - I ended up going 2 weeks early, but always had a date in my own mind two weeks after my actual due date so that I didn't go crazy if I did go over!

In terms of telling people after you've gone into labour, my opinion is DEFINITELY!!! On my tour of the labour ward I saw annoying family waiting outside and thought - I definitely don't want that- imagine the pressure (even if it's only in your head). In the end I did tell my parents and parents in law, as my labour was long and drawn out and because it was early I had to get them to help with installing the car seat! Because my labour was so drawn out, it was a long time between when I called them to let them know I was going into hospital and when they next heard from me. Obviously this was stressing my parents out, and dad rang the hospital- I happened to be just changing wards at the time, so that I could have an epidural - a very stressful time for me, as I had wanted a natural water birth. I distinctly recall using some very bad language about leaving me alone and that we'd let him know if I'd died or anything! Mum didn't even know he'd rung until 8 months later when I mentioned it! Also, turn your phone off in the labour ward!! God knows why I left it on, but we did have some calls, which was rather distracting!

Anyway in summary go for being vague and not telling anyone you're in labour until it's all over!

[BellyBelly]

I'd give them a vague time or even when you are 43 weeks LOL bound to have the baby by then

It's dangerous telling family, the pressure can be intense to know every little detail of every niggle and cramp, and then when you are in labour, if it's long, you get the impatience setting in and wondering when they are going to speed up your labour.... 'haven't they induced you yet?' 'you should have had your baby by now??' *rolls eyes*. Just builds anxiety in the couple...

[Mumma2three]

Last time I sent a big text to say DD had arrived, whilst they were stitching me up and DH was bonding with baby! Wow at technology! With DD1 it was slow word of mouth or whomever my mum called (10 years ago, no mobiles)!! But I wouldn't tell anyone Im in labour, and so far I havent' had people call and ask. I say the correct due date. I think these days with email and facebook etc, people will know from there what's' going on, before ringing you. (not family but it cuts out alot of friends calling)!

[Laranna]

We told everyone our due date, but then at 32 weeks I had to book a c/sfor 39 weeks due to placenta praevia - we kept this to ourselves and didn't tell anyone as we still wanted to surprise everyone with the birth news afterwards (not to mention avoid ppl hanging around the hospital!).

In the end, my labour started naturally 3 weeks early at 2am, still had the cs, but told everyone about 6 hours later. I had to ring my family first as they were due to show up at my place for mothers day breakfast

[StephV]

I'm telling people the due date as with a lot of 1st babies it seems to be 10 days overdue - so I tell them not to get too excited about the date..

But the labour - nope I don't want anyone calling during especially if it happens to be one of those 24 hour pls labours!