my mother hasn't been supportive of us having IVF to get pregnant because she think DH should have had a vasectomy reversal instead. She's always grumbled "how long are you going to keep doing 'this'?", meaning how long before we 'throw in the towel' & have a reversal. Like this if that was an option, we wouldn't have taken it??

So tonight, we was ****ed at me because a woman I know is thinking about embarking on the same process (ICSI). They've had a much longer lapse in time since the vasectomy, so this really would be their only option (besides donation). She started biting at me, spitting that not every one can afford what we have done, and there are other options, etc. Umm... no - no other options unless they are willing to accept a donation (which I think they would prefer to try to have thier own baby).

So finally I said, ":I know you have never approved of what we did, and you think we should have just had a reversal", and she says...

"It may seem harsh, but that process is more like a business transaction - akin to having a boob job in Thailand"



Instead of being completely speechless (much like I am now... I feel very short of breath just thinking about it), I told her that was extremely crass, and the FACTS are (from our specialist) that a reversal would have been doubtful to work, and the turn-around-time for the sperm to start functioning properly again & make it through the tubes could take ages - plus would never return to 'full strength', so we would potentially have compromised sperm quantity & quality.

I'm actually quite upset about what she said and how thoughtless a supposedly educated woman is - and that she has NO experience or foundation for her rediculous beliefs/ideas. I think she would have preferred me go though potentially years of struggle & heartache than taking her perceived 'easy road'. I tell you, two failed transfers didn't feel easy.

I'm meant to walk the dogs with her tomorrow morning, but I just don't want to be near her. I may tell her to eff off & she can wait for her my siblings to provide her with a non-plastic version of a grandchild... but I wouldn't hold my breath.