Pregnancy after Long Term TTC #7 - 2009

:wall: wishing baby, sending you hugs love. i'm really sad to hear this one wasn't to be. But it did make me remember that we had the same thing last year, nearly to the date! a longed for BFP just before chrissy... and when it wasn't it hurt very bad. But i hope you can pick yourself up and find some joy over this festive season. good luck honey.

kyra- CONGRATS on the house love!!! that's just the best news!

Janie - i can't believe your little jasmine is 8 mths old!!! lol where did the time go?

Green - don't worry too much about trying to retain all that info. they'll guide you on the day and DH will probably remember more than you think :) We are the same re pethadine... that's the only thing i'm kaputing. Everything else is fair game... but last resort. I found the pain relief session only strengthened my desire for a natural birth as possible lol.

lani - any luck with the bouncing? i bounced half my day away.. didn't seemed to hve doen anything.

hi poppy hope you are well.

Mitf - where are you love?

g'days to Boc, LM, Rob, Seph, Saph, sonyalouise, paula and high pants and all the lurkers :)

have ob appnt today. Am feeling very down about this baby ever coming atm. Swelling was very bad yesterday and very painful but i did manage to get a lion and two fish painted lol. DH home for 2 days :) He told me last night while rubbing my back that it felt "eewww weird'' cos of the fluid i'm retaining... lol. then said "it feels like the bottom on your feet, but on your back'' hhhhmmm and tell me again, we keep these men around why? but slept like a log, bubba very quiet this morning so maybe that's a good thing. who freaking knows at this stage tho!

wishingbaby im so sorry. No words can heal the pain. I hope you are ok.
Kyra well done on getting the house. What a relief that must be. Cant wait to hear all about your scan today. Good luck.
Rob very exciting that you get to see your bub in just 5 days.:dance:
Janie thank you thank you thank you! Its been a long time coming, as you know but we have finally been blessed :D So i guess my numbers are a good sign if they were the numbers you had and now have a beautiful baby girl. Yay! Thanks again for popping xx
Grub you poor thing. Hope the pain eases. Good luck with your appointment today.

Not much happening here. Just waiting patiently for my scan. 21 sleeps to go. Geez that sounds like ages away. Oh well it will be worth the wait.

Just had a quick question, did many of you ladies have a follow up BT to check HCG levels after your BFP? I havent been asked to go back at any point to check on them so a little concerned. Should i be doing HPT every week to make sure all is still well?

Hi Paula - I had two follow up blood tests but only because I wasn't rising high enough. If you haven't been offered them, then I think you can relax because it must mean that you were fine. I personally would ditch the POAS, what you don't want is any bad symptoms if you now what I mean (particularly red bleeding). In the absence of any bad symptoms, just assume that everything is fine. As my mother frequently tells me, don't forget your body WANTS to have a baby, it's nature kicking in. So unless something goes wrong, and you will know about it, try (and I know this is a stupid thing to say to a pregnant woman) to relax ;) until your scan xx

Airline - let us know how the scan goes. I'm :pray: ing

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Just had a quick question, did many of you ladies have a follow up BT to check HCG levels after your BFP? I havent been asked to go back at any point to check on them so a little concerned. Should i be doing HPT every week to make sure all is still well?

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Paula I actually have had the same question, although hadn't asked it. My levels were 100 at 10pt and then 48 hours later were 293. They said it was a BFP and no more blood tests needed, which is why I am so anxious to get a look I guess.

I have researched the net trying to work out if the numbers of possible embies that had taken,it would help me with knowing if there are 1 or 2 but they dont. My FS said that ppl can have high numbers and a single pregnancy and low numbers and a twin preg so I have to wait for the U/S to find out.

I did POAS again yesterday just to reassure myself it was still there. Poor DH must think I am a mental case. And then after reading about wishingbaby I guess reality sets in. Anyway at least we have each other to lean on.

Thanks LondonMiss i will try and relax, but of course, easier said than done.. :lol:

Rob its true, we are always told to think positive but after going through IVF and experiencing all that we have, the reality of it is that we are always on edge about what could happen. Fingers crossed for us all.

WIshingbaby: :hug: You poor thing, so sorry to hear, the same thing happened to us in May. It's totally heart-wrenching. My advice, surround yourself with positive, supportive people and just take time out for you. Just take time to heal. People are going to tell you all sorts of things so just take it all with a grain of salt and don't put too much pressure on yourself. I'm here if you feel like a chat.

Kyra: BIIIIG congrats on the house :hooray: and happy moving! Good luck, I moved a week before Xmas in 2005 and wasn't it a fun experience LOL. Hope it all goes smoothly for you hun.

Paula: My clinic does a standard 2nd BT a few days after the first to check numbers still doubling. But I agree totally with LM - STEP AWAY FROM THE POAS!!! They will only cause you more grief if you get a faulty one, best to rely on your body, as frustrating as that is, it will tell you if something is not right. You really must keep yourself busy and try to relax as hard as it may be.

Grub: You poor thing, and as for your naughty little bub disobeying orders to get the hell outta there... :lol: Good luck at Dr N's today!

AFM: AFM: just got back from the physio. Stupid midwife, fobbing me off & patronising me, I knew something wasn't right. apparently my back is shot (already knew that though) from years of gymnastics and dancing but more importantly I have a problem with my SI joints caused by the preg. Had some massage and manipulation done and have exercises to do and have to go back Monday to be given a belt-like contraption to wear that keeps my pelvis, hips & joints all in the right place.

Just glad to have some answers and hopefully it means I'll be able to get a little more sleep. Yesterday I was up from 2am and today it was 1am and I am royally stuffed!
I'm off to see if I can grab a couple more hours :asleep: while I'm all loosened up and relaxed from the massage.

Hope you all have a good day!

Hi ladies,

i'm going to attempt some persies, although i'm sure i'm going to miss people since i'm doing this at work in betwen other tasks!

BOC - glad you've found something to help you, though sorry to hear about your back. Don't you hate it when people just treat you like an idiot rather than actually take your concerns seriously. I get so mad!

Paula - CONGRATULATIONS AND WELCOME!! And i'm with the others. I didn't have any further blood tests after our BFP, and just had to wait for the scan. Like you, I was a little concerned because others around me were having them sometimes almost daily, but do take it as a good sign that you don't need any more!

Rob - I was the same as you! We had two transferred and I tried everything to get the nurse to comment on my levels and whether she thought one or two, but ultimately I think what you've said is right. Different people have different levels so really no way to tell at all until the scan. And once you see the scan and the heart beat, well I honestly didn't care either way if it was one or two IFYWIM!

Grub - sending all my 'getting out quickly and safely' vibes to little Grubby Bub!! Hope your ob appointment goes well and she has some good news for you xx

Greenslw - nowhere near antenatal classes yet but will be interested to read others' opinions of them. A couple of friends of mine refused to go, and others have loved them, so I guess a very individual decision, like everything else about pregnancy, childbirth and parenting :-) And perhaps you should make up a t-shirt that loudly refuses entry to anyone else even thinking about coming along to the birth!

Kyrawolfe - so glad you got the house! It's such an awful stressful time isn't it, at a time when you don't need any more stressful events in your life. I was in the same boat, trying to organise a move from Melbourne to Canberra. We found a place but can't move in until 21 December, so currently couch hopping... Will be thinking of you when you move!

Londonmiss - what a good tip about the curry - i'm going to remember that for when I might possibly need it! And so glad your second scan went well - must have been nice to recognise a baby after the first one, lol!

Smithy - hope you're still feeling better, though you have been a bit quiet so does that mean you still get dizzy if you sit on the computer chair?!

Laniwantsababy - will be sending some 'get out' vibes your way too!

lilmisshavachat - hope life calms down for you soon!

Saph - how lovely that you only have a few more days at work, yay!!!!!

sonyalouise - hope you've found a remedy for the MS, and I SO know what you mean about wishing your life away, it's something I do daily and am trying very hard to stop! Hope the next couple of days until the scan go quickly, will keep my fingers crossed for you that you finally get some answers xx

airline - have been thinking of you all day and praying that today goes well xx

poppyfairy - my goodness, I don't know how you manage to stay sane sometimes, I take my hat off to you! Sending hugs your way.

anyos - Welcome! Hope your time here is happy and healthy!

Okay, I think that's about as far back as I can go. To everyone else, and anyone I've missed, sincerest apologies and a big hello!!!

AFM - well we're still in limbo until we can move into the rental house as i'm getting very tired of living out of a suitcase. We were at my parents last week, and this week in a hotel, just to get some space. Back to the parents on Friday, and we'll stay there till it's time to move. Work is completely dreadful and I'm counting down the days (okay, maybe even minutes) until we go on leave!! I've been seconded to another business unit and the work i'm doing is about 4 levels below me so completely mind numbingly boring. I had the most dreadful headaches for a couple of weeks, all day every day and was taking panadol like nothing else! Found a new acupuncturist in Canberra and am feeling a lot better now. And our 12 week scan is next Wednesday and i'm so excited! We're FINALLY going public once we know it's all okay.

Phew, okay, that's more than enough for me. Will try not to leave it so long between (epic) posts, but with living out of a suitcase and our laptop still dead, it's a bit hard to do this on my phone!!

Hope you're all having a lovely Wednesday - i'm about to go shopping with my sister for a dress to our cousin's 'black tie wedding'. I've got something but dear sis needs advice, and who can pass up an excuse to go shopping?

love to all,
lise xx

Paula - we had a slow rise hcg last cycle so even though the 2nd result doubled in correct amount of time, we went to our GP and just asked for a quantative hcg test to be done, and it was no problem, esp. when he knew it was after IVF.

Lise and LM - thank you for your :pray: s and we're accepting as many as come our way! I've been a little emotional today, DH has said a few times he's on edge. We've been busy so far today...but now I'm knackered (I've only cleaned out the fridge, had a shower and gone to see an old mate!) so I'm gonna chill out watching Eastenders then we're going for a swim in our pool. Last time I couldn't float due to nausea...the bobbing was horrible;)

Kyra - fantastic news re. the house. Every place I've rented/owned I've just 'known' when viewing it that it was meant for us.

Lise - enjoy your shopping trip...mmmmm air con!!

grub...good to see the painting is still going!

sorry, my eyes are soo tired, so keeping it short

AFM - well our appt. is at 16.45. I have swung constantly for 2 weeks now between it's all over and how can it be over - I'm still shattered and tummy is 'unsettled'. Today is D day, and we're both feeling it a bit.

I've been a bit teary but silly things setting me off...listening to 1927's song, reading a card in a card shop about husbands, things like that. I will post later on today.
And thank you to the lovely ladies who pmd me, it means such a lot. xx

Best of luck today airline.

:hug:AIRLINE.im thinking of you here today to sweety.

gee there are a couple of you that are very clever with the perrsies and remembering all of us :D i dont think im gonna try anymore its getting so hard pmsl.. but gee im glad that just means more pg mummies in here .

afm. dh did my belly cast today it looks awsom im so happy with it and now i can actually see how big my belly is :dance: its soo cute,well paint it in a couple of days time now ill post a pic tonight in my photo site ok.
ok im going to eat pork chops,hot chips and gravy my dh has made :D
belly rubs to all

Smithy what a great idea! I saw some at some markets years ago and always said I wanted to have it done but now I'm actually pg I forgot all about it! And you've made me hungry for hot chips and gravy now. Actually, I want a hot chip sandwich with tomato sauce where the butter melts everywhere, mmmmmmmm.....

hi girls just a quick one from me... all is well. bub is very low and doc is hopeful he'll be here by monday. but have an appnt for 10am monday in case he hasn't arrived and we'll see then where we go.

but had to have a CTG scan measuring heart rate, movements etc cos bub was very quiet this morn and because the fluid levels at my 32 week scan were low. so doc just wanted to check he wasn't stressing out.

She seems to think i'll probably get induced next week if he hasn't come on his own due to the low amnniotic fluid levels.

ox

grub -=- good luck!! This probably really is the last time ill be on before your lil belly bub arrives! all will be fine I promise, and cant wait to hear all about it!

Hi to everyone else... Way to hectic for heaps of persies, but thanx to every one for all the well wishing messages <3..

Getting the keys to the new house tomorow.. the computer will be getting dismantled and driven across the country in the next few days lol.. So were organising and packing like mad atm, and will be driving our stuff over for the next week or two..

As for the scan ... BUBBA IS SO GORGEOUS! Everything is fine! It is smack bang in the middle of the size and weight range for its gest age.. and everything is where it should be and functioning fine.. Including what the tech nearly told us... the sex!

We had forgotten about that whole thing with all the excitement of just seeing the baby, and as he said to us "so what is it you have at home a little girl or boy??" I didnt even click and told him We have a DS. he started saying "well..." and DH suddenly picked up and stopped him at the last second!! But yes, he knows what we are having and we dont! HAHA! but we managed to hold out! The pictures he gave us are spectacular, MIL is convinced its a boy, and my best GF is convinced its a girl LOL.. Me and DH are still sitting on the fence and just cannot wait for the next 20 weeks to fly by so we can find out and hold our baby! But for now we are about to get more and more hectic up until christmas, then I'll be setting up the nursery! WOOHHOO

Thanx again and probably caio for now xx pop on after the move.. GOOD LUCK AGAIN GRUB!!

Ky

Oh grub you sound so unconfortable glad DH is helping out. Bubba will come soon. :hug:

Paula I had one at 2weeks, 4, 6 and scan at 8 Kept me confident.

Boc yaya for physios they are gods during pg. Glad you have an answer even if it's not great, always can get help. My physio appointment yesterday was like taking 20 Panidine on my bad back, SHE IS GREAT. Weekly visits now.

Lise yep I love the idea of a shirt. :D Boring work when you don't really want to be there is awful. When is End date?

Smithy what did you use for your belloy cast? sounds cool

Kyrawolf clad Bubba is beautiful great work, :D

ATM SLEEPY I stayed up thinking till 3.30am then got up went to work and now I'm readdy to flop on the couch. Was suposed to go into head office tomorrow but the two ppl I was going to see are sick so it's a day off for me, So 5 day weekend! :leap: but I'm working next Friday instead hoping all the sick ppl are over it.

Hey Airline, I hope you are out celebrating... let us know x

:DLISE AND GREEN.. well what we did to save money as these kits can be very expensive we just went to the craft shop or chemist(better the craft shop i rekon ) and got 6 x plaster bandages $26.00
then all you do is cut it all to size wet in a bucket of warm water one bit at a time and start covering your body with bandages sit there for 20mins let it set and gently pull it off,make sure to cover yourself in vaseline first so plaster doesnt stick :p to your body lol i just used a couple of old sheets under me .now all you do is let it dry for a couple of days ,give it a light sand and decorate if you wish :clap:
it was so much fun,we did it inside so not that messy i guess it was a weird feeling when it come off though like it pulled a couple of my belly hairs:redface:

hi grub hope your ok

Girls
I'm sad to report that no heartbeat was found and the foetal pole just wasn't big enough for our 9weeks and 1 day pregnancy. I wasn't able to remain composed and silently cried through the rest of appointment. DH cried all the way home, and now I just feel numb. We've had a good talk and feel fragile but no tears at present.

I would like to thank each and everyone of you who offered support, laughter, advice over the last few weeks. My time on this forum's come to an end, and I think I might bow out of BB for a while. There will be no treatment till after February probably.

I wish all of you to continue with a happy, healthy, exciting pregnancy and hope all runs smooth for you well deserving ladies. x

:grouphug::hug: oh airline hunny i am so sorry big hugs for you and dh rite now hun this road is so dam tuff sometimes and just not fair take it easy and look after each other xoxo

Airline - I am so sorry to read about the results of your scan. Sometimes life just isn’t fair. I truly hope that we will see you back in here early next year. My thoughts and prayers are with you and DH. I hope that your dreams come true soon. xo :hug:

Oh airline... :hug: :hug: hug:

Thoughts & prayers with you & hope to see you in here again next year. Glad you have DH & the furrys for support hun, take care of you xx

Airline - I'm so so sorry to hear that. You must be devastated, and I wish I could say something to make it better for you, but there isn't anything is there. I hope you will keep in touch and we will see you around in the New Year. I hope that you and DH have some good support around you, it's such a dark space.
xxx

*sorry to crash
Airline - so sorry for your loss :hug: I've been hanging out for good news for and so sorry you've been crushed again. Completely understand your need to step back - take care of yourselves. Hope to see you back here again one day with a sticky baby. :hug:

Airline honey I'm so so sorry. May you and DH find the comfort you need during this time. My thoughts and prayers are with you :hug:

love Lise xx

OH AIRLINE i'm so so sad to hear your news. give you dh a huge hug and get one back from him. It's been so lovely gettting to know you. wishing you all the best for 2010 and i hope time heals that pain a little bit lovely. oxoxo

Airline, I am so sorry to hear of your sad news, no words can make you feel any better. Wishing you all the very best for a great 2010.
:hug: :hug: Thinking of you :pray:

Airline I am so sorry.:comfort:

*Sorry for crashing also*

Airline - I am so so sorry to hear your news :hug:. My thoughts are with you and DH at this very difficult time.... I wish I could say something to make things better but I know words cannot ease your pain :hug:. :pray:'ing that it will not be long before you are back on this thread oxxoox

Smithy love your pics. The belly cast look amazing!
grub wow, your bub will be here by Monday. Thats so exciting.
Kyra congrats on seeing your baby. Must be the most amazing experience.
airline i am so sorry to hear your news. Bug cyber hugs being sent your way:hug:

Hi Lani and Grub, any movement?

Hi everyone.This is my first time posting in this section of the forum.I am currently 6 weeks and 2 days pregnant after approx 5.5 years trying.Problem is im really down as im so stressed it will all go wrong.I had a 5 week mc after round 1 of ivf in 2006 which caused my depression to go crazy and after 3 years tried ivf one more time,resulting in my current pregnancy.I have had some light brown discharge whiich my ivf clinic says is normal and dont really have many symptoms except weeing heaps and very very tired.My breasts hurt slightly.Some days they hurt,then other days they dont.My initial beta was 400 and prog great,second test the numbers were great also,but i didnt ask as i google everything and didnt want to become paranoid.I am a nervous wreck!! I shoould be nauseous,with very sore breasts but just feel so emotional.I have a 12 year old son so its not my first baby but feel like im going NUTS! Dont have my scan until 7 weeks.Am even doing urine pregnancy tests to check that im still pregnant.Can anyone calm my nerves?

Welcome Wantbaby#2. Try and relax. I am due tomorrow and I did not show any pregnancy signs til about 7 or 8 weeks. After my first scan. I was like you beside myself that something wasn't right but no I am only days away (hopefully) from meeting my bub.

Wishing you all the very best, stay calm and remain positive.

No progress for me with regards to labour, I am looking for any sign. I am becoming impatient.

Grub How are you going?

Hope everyone else is taking care :bellyrubs: to all xoxox

Hiya Wantbaby. I am in the same boat - I feel like I'm treading water until it "really" happens. Here's my three suggestions to keep you busy
1. Swimming. Distracting, good for the body, good for the baby.
2. Knitting or sewing. I love the idea that I've invested my pregnant time in something for the baby. It's abysmally bad, but hey...
3. Ordering a stack load of DVDs and become a film buff. I'm also plannning on working through the biggest pile of unread books you've ever seen in your life.
If they don't work, you can pop round and walk my hound if you like :lol:
Good luck with everything x

heya wantbaby#2
I know its a hard time to get through... You always think getting pregnant is the hard part but when you do fineally get tehre the worries just get worse :hugs:

swimming is a great idea.. I did it alot during those first testing weeks, and when you get out you feel so fit and ready to take on the world that you find yourself feeling positive about the baby for a change!

I think the main thing here is, you've had a mc before.. So in a way I suppose your mind is makeing you think the worst not only because your frightened at how long its taken you to get this far, and loseing everything youve been hopeing for, but also because youve been through it before, you half expect it to happen just as unexpectedly and inexplicably as before, because you never really got any answers and its easy to think, well its happened once for no reason, so it will happen again. It could be your subconcious trying to deal with the expectation as well..

I went through all the emotions your describing.. Another thing (other then not feeling pregnant enough) I felt was that I wouldnt bond with this baby out of pure defense for dealing with loseing it.. You have to remember not everyone gets Horrifically sick or absolutely tender sore boobs etc etc.. With my first succesfull preg I didnt even notcice I was pregnant until I was four months along! I had no symptoms, no ms, nothing.. If id not noticed much longer it would have been a kick that told me!

Everytime you have bad thoughts about the baby, try to think about the reasonable arguments why nothing is wrong.. like..

-=- Im not bleeding heavy and im not in a whole heap of pain
-=- Its normal not to feel pregnant in the first few weeks
-=- Its my turn this time around, and the worst isnt going to happen this time.
-=- Im only *insert amount of weeks here :p* away form the "safe zone"
-=- theres no reason that this baby simply CANT be perfectly healthy

I found counting down each week to week 12 really helped.. the closer you get, each week, have a little self celebration at your babys achievments at getting through the next week :) even if its just mentioning it to your dh, hearing yourself say out loud to him *only ** weeks to go b4 we're safe! really can help (at least it did with me) And try to remind yourself each week that nothing so far has gone wrong, enjoy every minute you are having with the baby :)

Im sure everything is ok hun! I think distracting yourself is also a great idea, surround yourself with friends, have a bbq or go out to dinner or the movies even.. things like that

Hope this helped.. We will all be here too if you need to vent

AFM packing wildly atm haha.. but the comp isnt shoved in a box yet so I decided to say hello to my loverlys b4 it does happen :p

HI!
lol talk soon <3 Ky

hi want baby! welcome to the forum love. do try not to stress too much. i know that doesn't help and the fear you have is very well founded. it's always so difficult particularly with pregnancy as it just swings from one worry to the next. But do try to live in the moment and enjoy it, whatever the outcome. Better off to spend the next few weeks happy and upbeat about your achievement than stressing yourself out.

Lani and LM - i'm still here too! and in an increasingly bad mood about that little fact. not sure what is happening and given up trying to guess at all the twinges and strange stretchings etc that are going on. The next friend or family member who sends me a mssage that says "had the kid yet?'' or tells me "all first babies come late" or "oh, spend the time sleeping cos you won't get to ever ever ever again" WILL get their head through the wall, then i'll kick their butt to make sure the job was done correctly.

I"m in a rotten mood and everyone is a bloody expert or lecturing me on what i should be doing. it's not a pleasant mix. Anyhoo, at this stage i feel crap and like this baby is never coming out. So am just trying to think in small blocks of time... 3 days till i see the doc again and hopefully we'll know more.

OVER IT!!!!

lani, i hope you are a lot more pleasant a person than me atm.

sorry for the rant girls. ox

:hug: I'm so sorry Airline.. I hope that come February we will see you back in here with some awsome results.. Until then we will all be thinking of you and your DH...

Welcome Wantbaby#2... Congratulations...

Thankyou girls for your support.Well after 2 weeks of stress i have finally broken down crying over the phone to my mum,revealing all my anxiety and worry.I feel a little better now,having let it all out.Will aim to take each day as it comes.Will promise myself and my baby,that i will try and be positive. ((Hugs)) Alicia.

Grub I am exactly the same as u if everyone doesn't stop calling I am turning my phone off and ignoring everyone. I am frustrated and want to meet this baby.

I am actually really on edge tonight and feel extremely weird.

Take care hopefully not too much longer sending u lots of positive labour vibes xoxo

lani-=- you might be feling weird cuz ur about to go into labour!

Fingers crossed, any moment now hun :pray:

Hey Lani and Grub,

it seems like it's been a while since anyone in our group had a regular birth at the baby's choosing ( not C/S or induction) so I hope in some way it might feel a bit special to have a bit of apprehension about when your babies choose to come. I can't imagine what you are going through as I had to pencil in a date for my caesarian that fitted into the doctor's schedule, and when I thought of it, I realised that I chose my baby's birthday. Now that is a weird feeling. What you are going through is as normal as nature intended it so endure the wait as long as everything is safe and you are healthy. You've come so far and done an amazing job keeping these little ones safe along the way. I know it's a crazy, anxiety filled time but I hope it passes by quickly and you have your lovely bundles safely in your arms before much longer.

Lots of love and enjoy the most amazing ride of your lives.

P.S don't reject the pethadine, the most fun you can have and it's legal. I'm still piecing together bits of memories of people I phoned or texted the night of Jazzie's birth (how embarrassment). I remember of the birth and I was totally with it, don't get me wrong, things just got a bit hazy later on after they stepped up the pain relief. Hee hee, what a hoot! Confiscate all mobiles! Lotsa luck lovelies:crossfingers:

Hi all!!

Lani and Grub - I have told everyone that knows me that the doctor has said I will probably deliver at 42 weeks. I sometimes have to make up some interesting reasons as to how he apparently knows,but usually fobbing them off with 'it is a different pregnancy due to it being IVF' seems to work!!! LOL!

Want baby#2 - Welcome! Remember every pregnancy is different so your lack of nausea etc may just be because it is a different pregnancy to your last one. Also turf the books and internet! I actually took a belly belly break in my early days as I found I was analysing everything I read too much. If I had a really big concern like I felt a sharp pain that wouldn't go away for example I would do a quick search on here and perhaps on yahoo answers, get my bit of reassurance, then I would walk away. If I looked at too many sites I would go crazy. Take each day as it comes. Every new day is another tick off the calendar and closer to a new milestone. Good luck!

Smithy - I am going to check our your pics soon! Hope the sickness is abating a bit.

Everyone else Belly Rubs!!!

AFM - Baby is starting to engage!!!! Had midwife's appointment today and he is 1/5 engaged! Yay!!! As he had been lying in the right position for at least twelve weeks I was hoping he would continue being a good boy and stay that way and he has!! I have started drinking Raspberry Leaf tea once a day and will crank it up when I get to 36 weeks. I am starting to dream about the birth now and feeling pretty positive. I am reading about hypnobirthing and psyching myself up about my body and baby knowing what to do. The pubic pain is starting to relieve a little. The midwife said it being really bad recently was obviously him starting to engage.

The family dramas continue. My father just left my house an hour ago after staying for three days. I am waiting for a phone call from him telling me if he has been kicked out of his house on his return. He has more or less decided to leave her. We looked at rental flats around here for him and found out from the council how much pension etc he would get if he left her. Before he came here she had told him that he had to choose between her and me!!! He said that was the final straw. The thing is I never ever in all this asked him to choose me or her. I just asked that he separate us in his life. I told him I don't want her in my life but never said he had to choose. Dad and I agreed that this would be possible and had worked it out that he would from now on visit me alone (which she should prefer as she hates me and hates where we live!!!) and he would continue living as normal with her but I would just be separate. Well her reaction to that was that he loves me more than her and he has more allegiance to me than her and he now has to choose between us!!! He said he spent hours trying to convince her that his love is different for us both and he can love us both at the same time etc etc It is crazy that a father should ever have to explain his feelings about his children!!! Anyway he talked for a long time to me and DH about other issues in his marriage and how he has always complied with everything she wants and she has never ever done anything that he wants and he said he is fed up. So anyway he may be back here in 3 weeks when he retires and will stay with us until he finds a flat. (which selfishly I hope will be before the baby comes!!! ...I still want a baby moon! This baby is going to have to come at 42 weeks!!!)