Pregnancy after Long Term TTC - November 2008

Bel - my DH is a long distance truckie, so can be away anything up to 10 days at a stretch, then home a day or three, depending on what is happening. thankfully he has a fantastic boss that gets him home (albeit sometimes ONLY JUST) for all appointments. he has only missed one FS appointment the whole time, and that was simply because i said it wasn't worth him coming home. every other appointment he's been home so that's helpful. apparently the bosses wife is a bit envious - DH gets home, but the boss used to miss their appointments! oopsie! i think we did the right thing with the boss from the start - he offered DH a job - DH accepted on the condition that he were home whenever an appointment comes up. he started with this boss during the TWW of our full stim IVF cycle - so the boss knew from the outset about IVF... boss has four kids, and wants to be able to spend more family time, so after less than a year, he's looking to train DH to run the business from home while he is away with his family. means more home time for DH, more free time for the boss... and more work for me (DH can't use a computer! lol).

i think the big thing is that i've come to a place of acceptance of physically being a single mum - provided i still have his emotional support. having him home is fantastic, but having him listen when i'm down is what i really need - no matter where he is!

Gosh am gone a few days and there is a new thread and lots of chatter!
Firsty congrats (again) HM, Kahlan and on-trak
Bel - yay twins! How exciting!
Shann ... not long to go hun how exciting!
Hi to you all and :bellyrubs: will do personals later as was planning to leave work at 5.30 and am still here reading away!
AFM: 1st scan tomorrow! Yay! Cant wait! Of course am nervous as, but just need to go with the flow.
Will let you know how I go
Mon :)

It's so busy in here...struggling to remember everything I've just read in this and the last thread! I've only just got my computer going again after nearly a week without it.
I had my GTT on Monday and the Dr called and left a message for me today as he wanted to discuss the results. I've called him twice and left messages but he's been with patients so I still haven't heard from him. The midwife said he would only call if there was a problem, so of course now I am freaking out because it looks like I have GD and I have 20+ weeks of pg to go.
Feeling a lot of flutters now which is nice. I also booked in for my next scan which is in 2 weeks, booked our antenatal classes and am starting a pregnancy excercise class this week as well. I feel the need to get off my backside and do something after sitting around for the last 12 weeks feeling tired and struggling with m/s.
Am going to try and keep up with everyone from now on..... sorry, couldn't possibly do personals after reading 5 pages of posts! ;)

Megan Hi ya!....a couple of days ago wen i joined...i thought yep busy in here but not too bad...i can keep up....and then i keep meeting more and more new people. So I appologise for when i will regularly miss people...will do my best.

Mon- Yay you are in here too!! Love to you hun and good luck for the scan...i am with you in spirit and 'going with the flow' sounds like a great plan! I will do the same at dr appointment today...first one and already getting a funny belly.

Bel- Thanks Hun, we are all pretty wicked aren't we.. enioy your nap.

BW- Mwua...thanks, I feel much more 'normal' thanks to you girls. Get some rest hun...and boot that loving hubby of yours...naughty!!! LOL

Kahlan- Of course we can share info hun...I am around the 10-12th July...but mid july sounds less definitive! I have Dr appointment today for the first time so will let you know what happens hun. Bear/bare (never remember which one) with me though...the uk is not so forth coming with helpful sometimes...fingers crossed. I am an Aussie in Essex...

Possoms- Oh hun, I am so so sorry. Your perspective has kicked me up the bum...much needed. My heart breaks for you going through this. I had a early miscarriage in May hun and now knowing how much excitement builds from one day to the next...you must have been knocked for six. I send you all my love and comfort and I will do my best to make you proud hun. Take care and thank you so much.

Janie- Hi ya...nice to meet you.

BG- LOL re 'gremlin'. I am avoiding all books and pictures for the time being with pictures of the embryo and early foetus until it more resembles a human...i was in the book store a couple of days ago and scared myself to pieces...Told Hubby....What on earth have you done to me?!!!! Ha
Hope you feel better son hun and having your hubby away so much must be quite challenging. I remember us talking about it a long time ago when i was adjusting to not working with mine. I think you are incredible!!! We are here for you hun...you won't be a single mum if we can help it...well emotionally anyway. Enjoy your bludge day and I plan on taking a similar view as you...one day at a time...don't look too far ahead...I can handle it. a couple of days ago i said to myself, right just get to day 36 first (which was my longest ever cycle) then next get to 6 week scan....then 8 weeks to tell everyone...then 12 weeks will be christmas...etc etc. It is the best way you are right!

AFM- Right you incredible women...you are so empowering and love to you all.
Today for me is the first DR appointment...have no idea if he will take my blood or send me to the hospital again like last time...where i will wait for hours. Hubby can't come which is a shame but i am fine with it. Would be good to have his comfort. I will get past today and having booked my scan for about a weeks time...i will end today feeling very confident with how we are...all 3 of us.

xoxox HM xoxoxo

*throws suitcases in*

Okay which bed is mine?!

Hi Folks...decided it was time to bite the bullet and officially move in here seeing as BG keeps telling me I have to think more possimistic like!

For those who know me "Howdy" and for those who are new "Nice to meet you all and I hope to get to you know you better over the next few weeks andmonths...YIKES! Sounds scary saying it out loudlike that!"

I am so with everyone on the whole focus so much on getting pregnant and then cr8p your dacks moment when you actually do get that BFP.....I think panic is my middle name at the moment. scared of being a mum...scared of miscarrying (gotta love the knicker checking - even DH asks everytime I go to the loo! scared of Morning Sickness, complications (of which there could be plenty seeing as I am a type 1 diabetic as well)...well you get the gist.

I 'think' a touch of morning sickness type stuff has started to kick in the past day or so...just a feeling of being empty even though I have recently eaten type thing nothing too major so far, touch wood. I am with you Kahlan...I am sticking to the my mum didn't have morning sickness, my sister didn't have morning sickness, I will NOT have morning sickness theory. I dont care what you say BW...ignorance is bliss over here!!LOL

I have to have a repeat blood tomorrow to check my HCG and P4 as we will be tracking these for quite a while to come I guess. My levels on thursday were HCG 615 and P4 52 so I am guessing my HCG needs to be around the 5000+ mark if it is doubling properly..... fingers crossed.

And I get a scan next Friday to make sure we have a heartbeart :pray:

Anyone here have any experience with taking prednisilone, clexane and P4 pessaries during the first trimester? We are following instructions from the illustrious Dr. Sacks after finding out we have an NK cell issue earlier in the year. OMG prednisilone does wonderful things to blood sugar levels....In the past week alone I have more than doubled my insulin doses and I am still not quite back to normal...almost there just need to do some tweaking...Let the fun begin!!

Okay that's enough from me...Look forward to getting to know you all!

Hi ya Mel Bel,
LoL re suitcases and 'which bed is mine?'...love it. Like a big 9 month slumber party...how fun. We will have to have the odd virgin ****tail with our fluffy slippers on and sexy slinky hot mamma pjs!

Also re the 'knicker check' This will make you guys laugh...sorry if TMI My husband was in the shower ...and I went to the loo this morning and wiped...then i hear this Oh No are you spotting?....I loudly replied..NO, you twit! God I love him...if he could have his head in the loo each time i go...he would. Love him though for being so involved. It reminded me of a site a saw recently that encouraged the man to get involved as much as possible and to support the pg testing, to be around ...but not too close etc...but please don't hold the POS for her as she will know best which direction she will go...MAD ME LAUGH!

Love and wishes
HM xoxoxox

Hi Melbel,

Glad to meet you.

Oh I love slumber parties!

I have taken the day off and hadn't done much at home... I have got 2 assignments to complete and well.... still checking the forum...

My DH is also very concern. This sarvo I had a little bit of indigestion. I called him and said that I am in pain. I didn't get to tell him that it was unrelated to the baby and he was already fretting. just after dinner he rubbed my back and tummy (personal note to self... will not try and use this advantage in the future to get what I want).

Girls, I've got a question. I get dizzy spells when I get up really quickly or start to walk and turn my head quickly. When I get this I have to stop and close my eyes before my balance and spatial awareness returns. Do any of you experience this early on in your pg? I am also getting CM++ on some days and not on others.

Mel Bel - Congrats on that :bfp: you have me laughing still
HM - Goodluck at the Drs all 3 of you will be fine
Megan - :hug: hope the Dr calls soon maybe all managable too sweet
Mon - So excited about your scan can't wait to see a pic of super bub :)
Bel - Trying to find the cafe now details will be here
https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...reg-8-nov.html


To everyone else and my head is :o spinning trying to keep up :grouphug: talk soon.

Me too Kahlan, CM- little bit enough to be on knickers at end of day...and a little dizzy sometimes. But I do occasionally get a little dizzy when my blood sugar is a bit low...eat something small and often hun and see if it helps. xxoxo

Thanks HM. Glad to know I am not the only one....hmm... will consider about the blood glucose level in the future. since we are on the topic, I might as well share, my tummy is rather bloated (like the time during the stimulated cycle).. wonder if you are experiencing the same. I know the baby is no more than 1mm but god all the blood going down there does make my tummy big (am very petite... actually underweight) that's why it really shows.

eat small and often for the dizzies. BP could be a little low if it's happening when you stand up quickly. take it easy getting up! not as easy done as said, but hey, we'll say it anyway! i've found i can mostly control it that way. i dived up to grab my mobile the other day - thankfully DH was home and caught me as the dizzy took over - so just take it easy!

Mel - so glad you're being more "possimistic" - about time!! you probably need the (in)sanity of talking to others not just me - i'm a very one dimensional person - it's all about ME!! pull up a comfy chair, and get yourself into this chat!

AFM - had a pregnant moment earlier (though it could almost be a blonde or just downright STOOPID moment) - put some food in the oven to cook and not sure if i put the oven a bit higher than normal, but somehow i managed to turn it all to charcoal. i'd planned a late-ish dinner to sustain me through the night, and it ended up a VERY late dinner when i had to cook a whole other meal! i had intended being in bed on my way to sleep by nine - it's now almost 10, i have to go feed the haminals, take the bin out - and put myself into bed, so i'm going to do a runner!

nite all!

Just passing through on my way to bed - didn't think there'd be this much to read!

Mel, good luck with the anti-ms thoughts! I hope it works for you! And you've just (I think) hit on the reason for my low BSLs... I dropped my prednisone dosage and I don't think my body has adjusted yet! All I can suggest is keep in close contact with Dr S and follow his guidance. He's usually brilliant at replying quickly, I've found.

Anyway... must go... think it's going to be another night of excitable munchkins - he's been going off all afternoon without a break!

BW

Hello Ladies

Mel HUGE :welcome: and congrats so glad to hear of your BFP!! Woohoo! You can have my bed i am well and truely ready to go!

Khalan- The CM & Dizziness sounds pretty normal, take it easy and make sure you are eating reguarly etc. Look after yourself!

Megan - Good luck with the Dr, did you do the 1 or 2 hour test? If you did the short one he may just want you to do the longer one and you may be perfectly fine! Good luck!

HM - Ahh you make me laugh your DH sounds like mine!

TL - not long know until we know if its Archer or Charlotte and i can't wait! Plus i want to see more pics of that gorgeous baby!

This thread is taking of it is just fantastic 2008 has been such a wonderful year for BB AC stats! I know i have missed heaps of people but i am reading and sending huge :bellyrubs: to everyone!

Only 8 sleeps to go here, and after a very dissapointing Ob appointment yesterday babies are still head down and the boy is almost completely engaged but after a not so nice internal something is wrong she thinks his head may not be positioned right so he is not putting the right pressure on my cervix so all my pain is not doing any good its just because his head is tilted wrong which will make the induction a lot harder. So ate a fair amount of crunchie chocolate and curled up on the couch all crampy and feeling sorry for myself.


Shan

Youchy Shannon, You have all the crunchies you want hun...i would be feelign sorry for myself too hun. Hopefully the bubbas are on their way. Will you have to induce or can you go naturally if you can? Oh how very exciting.
Hm xoxox

Shan sorry about the bad appointment.

Yes 1 week 4 days till 20 week scan

TL... that is great hun...keep the count down going.

God i hope never to have an internal!!!

just popping by again...
:D

Melbel- congratulations

hippymum- your comments made me smile...thank you :) I'm sure you'll be a great mummy!

HM, at 30 weeks I've had all of one internal exam (not counting the 6 week internal scan), and that was at 17 weeks and only because I'd been bleeding. I think internals are something that aren't going to happen regularly, at least until we're in the final stages of pregnancy like Shannon is.

Shan, sorry the appointment wasn't as great as you'd hoped... hopefully things will go well and your little troublemaker will move a bit soon.

I'm with you though, the stats in here have been amazing - even for those having been under long term assisted conception... I think we've got one LTACer due every month for the first 6 months of the year - and that's bloody amazing and super fantastic!

Can anyone (Shan, I think :o you're the only one left ahead of me now) tell me about the sharp, shooty, stabby pains in the cervix? I'm still pretty sure Munchkin is transverse, so I don't think it's a well-aimed kick!

BW

Thanks for that BW...yeah i have heard that unless you have an issue, you can opt not to have one...i guess it depends. Thanks for the comfort hun.
Yukky stuff!

Shannon, hope you enjoyed your crunchie choc :) I really hope you don't have to wait those full 8 days. Fingers crossed over here.
TL, looks like my scan is the same week as yours. They've booked me in just before 19 weeks. The countdown is definitely on here too!
It's official, I have GD. I did the 2 hour test and my blood sugar levels were 5.9, 10.1 and 8.4. I saw the diabetes educator and dietician this afternoon and the finger *****ing starts tonight. Hopefully I can get things to settle down without going on insulin. I was so upset after my appointments. They put all these thoughts into your head about the size of baby, possibly difficult birth, jaundice baby etc.. here I thought I might get an easy pregnancy after all the crap I went through to get here.

That's a bugger Megan...if you need any tips feel free to holler in my general direction and I will try and help.

Shannon..... I thought you also had GD or am I mistaken? If so crunchie choc tsk tsk......hehe

hi everyone else hope all those bubbas are treating you well today.

I got my latest HCG done today and so far the results are as follows:

4w2d 172
4w5d 615
5w5d 2085

Am having major panic attacks here because it does not seem to have doubled appropriately the past week...Dh has been trawling sites trying to reassure me but at the moment I am a nervous wreck and of course Thursday would be the day my doctor is not there in the afternoon so I cant talk to him about them till tomorrow...grrrrr.....feel like *****e....am so over all this...why can't it just go 'normally' for once in my life! So not fair....... :(

Hi Girls
Just a quick pop in, wooahhh its been really busy in here which is just fantaastic :dance: yeah to all those who got there BFP. Sorry for lack of personals but after reading most of the posts i wouldnt know where to start, will try to pay more attention :doh:
Big belly rubs to you all and hope everyone is going along nicely.
Hey Devon (belly buddy :lol:) how are you going? It really feels like we are picking up speed now :o hope you are good!

Hi Everyone -

Wow ! I was offline for 2 days and so much to keep up on. I've read through all the posts and enjoyed a good laugh out of some of them.

Welcome to Melbel and On_tra_K - congratulations on your BFP's !! I am new to this as well and still finding my way through books and every internet site I can find on early weeks of pg.

I'm not even going to try with personals today but hoping everyone is doing well in this amazing journey to motherhood.

AFM - feeling ok, not a lot of PG symptoms yet and counting the sleeps (8 to go) until our first scan. I've had some weird CM the last 2 days which has me a bit freaked out. Twice now when I've gone to pee (I always blot a bit first to check for spotting, sorry for TMI) and there isn't any, but then when I wipe after a pee, there is a soft pink tinge on the paper, not much , just a little tinge. It happened once on Wednesday and once again today - about 24 hours apart. Now I am checking every 30 mins and :pray::pray::pray::pray::pray::pray: for no spotting.

Take care everyone,
LNB

Megan- Hope the GD can be controlled hun. Wish you all the best with it. One more thing fo ryou to think about but absolutely no reason for you to think you can 't have a normal pg, birth weight etc. Don't let them make you feel that it is out of your control. You can do it hun and your baby will be beautiful. Take care of yourself and you will be safe. What a git of a Dr to scare you so much. It has so much to do with HOW they talk to you!! I had a bla appointment today too..could have shot him.

MelBel- Hope the HCG is just taking a breather and you have a good surge soon. I am sure you will be ok hun. Wouldn't it be nice if we all hit the 'normal range' for once!! Good luck hun.

LNB- Hope it is nothing to worry about hun...to make you smile- Don't chaff yourself! LOL Many women Bleed full on and stil go on to have wonderful pg. My SIL did too. It is just a shame as it gets you so stressed. Easy sailing for LNB please...that is an order!

AFM- Had a horrid afternoon at the DR. He refused point blank to refer me to a scan or blood tests on the NHS. It really upset me. It seemed my case was not reason enough for him. He had to nerve to say 'if it is not meant to be, it is not meant to be and nature will take it's course'. God i was beside myself. I can't afford to have it done privately and i am feeling really irresponsible not being able to be proactive. If this pregnancy (the beginning of) was risk free....then i would have been pregnant years and years ago. What an insensitive approach to someone who has been trying for 10 years to have a baby. People have ART to sustain a pregnancy and i don't even have the choice to have a natural progesterone if i need it.
I am NOT ALLOWED to have a scan before 12 weeks. So it will be a very long and axious wait for us. He said unless i am in pain or bleeding, he can't help me. So much for preventative care. I was fuming...your Dr is supposed to have you best interests at heart. I was not being rediculus and he treated me like a neurotic pg woman over reacting. Anyway, i will just have to look after myself from now on...i am not going back to him. The pain of it is in the Uk you can't choose your DR....so changing is a huge deal. Oh god, we are hopeful and leaving it in natures hands. He also said to take folic acid...doh...but then made me laugh by saying...IF YOU WANT, you could take a multi vitamin...Thanks for that mate. He has no idea what kind of nutrition i am getting and for all he knows i could be under nourished. What kind of advice is that??? Luckily i have been doing this for years...anyway he took my blood pressure...that is it. No abdominal touch, no temp, no pulse, no Pee in a cup....Am I expecting too much. Nothing to even confirm the pregnancy.
Ok I am mad again now so i better go. There is no point getting myself stressed over this...i just risk my baby...for that idiot, i don't think so!!

Love to you all and up the bum of DRs over here!!
Hm oxoxox

Mel - :redface: yep i do have GD, thats how naughty i was with the crunchie chocolate. Somehow i can eat a little chocolate and get ok levels but eat a slice of multigrain bread and my levels are skyhigh :rolleyes: But it was WAYYYYYY to much crunchie chocolate!
Hope those HCG levels pick up speed, and the dr has only good news for you tomorrow. I have everything crossed... and nope your not normal you fell pregnant by having sex! :o What is that all about! :rofl:

Megan - Sorry to hear about the GD that really does suck, i remember the feeling well and definately take Mel up on her offer she has great advice! The main thing that helped me was eating protein for breakfast, two boiled eggs and a glass of milk helped keep the levels down. Boring as bat poo but really made a difference, ask away and i will try and be helpful if i can. But huge :hug: cos it is really crap when they ring with the news and doing the *****ing!

HM- i would be soooo peeved, he really has some nerve, what about the emotional effacts of the 10years TTC, i was totally freaked and had several scans to reassure myself. Can you go see another GP and not mention you saw this one? Is it possible to say your not sure exactly how far along you are and get a dating scan? Did i mention crunchie chocolate?? Hope your feeling better soon.

BW - Ahh the shooty pains that make you lift your butt of the chair really quickly are lots of fun, ive had them for ages i think its just bubs putting pressure down there which can only be good for later on.

LNB - Will have everything crossed for you, im sure bubba is doing just fine. I know this might sound silly but i you sure it isnt a pattern on the TP? I freaked myself out once big time with that.

Shan

:

---

I got my latest HCG done today and so far the results are as follows:

4w2d 172
4w5d 615
5w5d 2085

---

Melbel, if it helps, 85% of women with normal pg only has hcg level increase every 72 hours so yours might just be o.k. Hang in there hun.

:

---

AFM - feeling ok, not a lot of PG symptoms yet and counting the sleeps (8 to go) until our first scan. I've had some weird CM the last 2 days which has me a bit freaked out. Twice now when I've gone to pee (I always blot a bit first to check for spotting, sorry for TMI) and there isn't any, but then when I wipe after a pee, there is a soft pink tinge on the paper, not much , just a little tinge. It happened once on Wednesday and once again today - about 24 hours apart. Now I am checking every 30 mins and :pray::pray::pray::pray::pray::pray: for no spotting.

Take care everyone,
LNB

---

LNB I am sorry you have to go through such anxiety. For any consolation, my sister had light bleeding for the 1st trimester for both of her boys. They are both born healthy. Apparently it is very normal to have some spotting during pg.

HM, how dare the gp! I am surprised that the gp could be so insensitive! I agree with Shannon.. see if you could go to another dr.

AFM, had my second bt at 5w2d. HCG level at 8910 and P4 at 66. I told the nurse that I am very surprise the hcg level is so high. 7 days ago it was only at 316. She said it was all fine. I didn't argue with her but thought to myself, it is increasing greater than the doubling every 48 hours theory (which if true my level should only be at ~4000 mark). I can't be carrying twins as I only had 1 embie transferred... identical twin??? Has anyone has identical twin through AC??? or could it be molar pg???? I am doing my own head in :wall::wall:

Kahlan...I wonder if it is twins hun,...those levels seem nice and high. I wish i could compare with you right now. Maybe the less i know the better. Yep My dr is an idiot. I would have to put a pretty good case together to change drs...not usually allowed. I just don't want the stress.

Shan...Thanks hun. I know, other friends have suggested a fake it a bit, but i just don't want to do anything negative that might tempt fate. Best i can do right now is get some quotes. See if i can get a second opinion by ringing the fert clinic...see how i go from there. Why oh why can't this be straight forward...a BT is not going crazy.

Love to you guys xoxox

hi HM,

Perhaps not knowing is a bliss... In truth I have read that even if the drs know something is not quite right with the pg they can't do much for us anyway... then it becomes a sit and wait game of which most is of anxiety... With my recent bt result, I am just going to accept that things are going well and wait for my scan. I have the option of doing a 7w scan but am contemplating doing an 8w scan instead as the 7w appointment clashes with work committment. Not sure yet. The sonographer that I have been referred to is a also a gyn and ob so would be able to give me interpretive results straight away so I am not keen to change the appointment to fit the 7w scan and just end up having someone else. What would you recommend?

Anyway, good night everyone. Talk more tomorrow.

Kahlan, Sounds like the 8 week is the way to go then hun. I will send you a link in your PM for a video of 8 week development.
You are right, we just have to believe that everything is going to be fine. I can't help but have a glimmer of the thought...if i lost this baby could it have been prevented? I will be fine. I fell strong and the spirit of our bubba feels strong too.
Love to you hun

Hi Ladies -

Shannon - good point on the TP. DH bought TP that has teddy bears on it (i have no idea why) so I am constantly folding little squares that don't have the brown of the teddy bear in the 'blot zone' as I call it so I don't freak myself out. I am going out to be white TP on the weekend, enough of making TP look like oragami ! Thanks for your kind thoughts, I too have everything crossed but feel good so am praying that is okay.

HM - LOL on the chaffing comment - I needed a good laugh - thanks :) Sorry to hear your DR was such a sh*t to you. I wonder sometimes why some people go into professions based on caring when they just don't seem to care about people. I lived in the UK for a few years so I know how frustrating the medical system is there - can you find a midwife maybe?

Kahlan - your levels sound good - isn't weird how we stress over things being to high or to low. I've read the the levels can fluctuate in how they rise and the 'doubling every 48 hours is a guide not a rule. Take care and don't stress to much.

Hope everyone else is doing well today and looking foward to the weekend so we can obsess about our bellys without the distraction of work :)

AFM - no more wierd CM last night or this morning. I am going to call my clinic today just to feel like I've done something about it. I am feeling positive this morning that it hasn't gotten heavier, worse and my BB are more tender this morning. DH keeps laughing at me and says they are tender because I poke at them all the time to check on them :)

Have a great Friday ,

Take care,
LNB

LNB -Tee heee re the over handling of the boobies. Good one love!
I can't remember if i read where you are on your cycle hun? What day or week are you and when are you due. You will have to add to your signature and get a ticker or something to celebrate the occasion. I was going to hold off on it but hen thought...why not encourage this as much as i can.

I have always thought i would get a doula later on and if i didn't find the midwifery service good enough then i would get an independent...which is for alter down the track. Pricey to get from here on in and again...not much they can do yet.
Take care hun and enjoy your work day!! I will be in bed!

Hippy mum - I hope I don't sound insensitive, but have you mentioned your angel bub to the GP? It's just that I have read that they may be more likely to give you an early scan if there is a history of m/c.

The other thing that you may want to consider is that there is a risk that a scan too early they will not be able to detect a HB and then you have a whole new level of stress as you wait a few more weeks to find out if the scan was done too early or if there is really no HB.

I know I was climbing the walls for my early scan, so please don't think I'm trying to put you off.

I too have lived in the UK (Scotland to be precise) and I abhor the health system there. I was very ill when I first arrived and didn't have the first clue about registering for the dr's - they would not see me at all. I ended up in A&E.

Anyway, I'll keep trying to think of reasons for an early scans....the reason of dating is a good one if you know you want to have an NT test done - as they need to know the date before the 12 week mark.

Good luck. Where abouts in the Uk are you?3

x

Hey Nic, I am in Essex.
If i couldn't get the scan he could have given me the BT referal for Hcg levels. I totally know what you mean and that is kind of what has comforted me in a way...the whole part of have more to think about kind of thing! Yeah he knows about the miscarriage, i was in pain and bleeding when i saw him last and he sent me to the hospital. So he knows and he knew how anxious i was back then.
I will be ok. I am sure my intuition is serving me well and this little bub is here to stay. I am taking my temp everyday and I will continue to do a pg test each week to keep an eye on the strength of the line...rest and be careful. Remain positive etc.
It was the principle more than anything...just got me so upset needlessly, no bedside manner. These first few weeks are nerving and fragile. Anyway.
Hugs to you Nic, thanks so much.You are far from insensitive hun.

Could you try going directly to the hospital? Even if it's just for the BT? I'm sure you have thought of all of these things and I guess it is a part of being a LTTTC'er.

Not sure what exactly we have lost whether it be the innocence or naivety about falling pregnant (that thought that is constantly in the back of every woman's mind - when I'm ready I will fall pregnant and live happliy ever after) but my friends don't understand what it is like. When the ask when is your first scan I say - I've already had 3, my first was at 7 weeks. The kind of look at me like I'm a freak. They all POAS - got it confirmed by the Dr - got to 12 weeks - had the NT scan - carried on. They just assumed that everything would be fine and it would all work out.

It's a funny old world. The things life throws at you.

Take care
X

Hey everyone...have been reading your posts, and just want to say :

early pregnancy is such an anxious time....if we get monitored, we worry about the results, sometimes needlessly....if we dont get monitored we freak out that something is going wrong...it sometimes seems like there is just no solution in the first tri to really bring peace of mind!!

re HCG levels- mine were monitored and it freaked me out because they were rising more slowly than they should..and yes, in my case things didn't end well. But my OB and IVF nurse both openly said women's HCG levels can rise at different rates, and many women with higher or lower than normal levels go on to have perfectly healthy babies. So HCG levels can sort of do your head in, sometimes for no good reason at all

sending my best to you all. good luck with scans etc !

Hey Nixon - I felt that way when pregnant...people didnt understand how anxious I was...even when my HCG levels weren't right they kept telling me to relax, that things would be fine...I just had to chill out...it made me want to scream! (ok, so now I am probably still really emotional and could scream a lot, but that's beside the point :))
I also felt sad I had lost that innocence- do others feel that way too?
I know that when I managed to fall pregnant again, I will be even worse after this recent loss. I wonder how I could ever enjoy the first 12 weeks.

Hippymum- I think you should surely be able to have a BT or scan ! I felt annoyed reading about your GP.

LNB- lol about prodding your boobs...i was exactly the same

I have just kind of accepted that this is the way it is and that there won't be any other way for me. Hey - it could be worse people - it could be 35 years ago when none of this was even possible. I would rather be in the situation I'm in now than what my mother would have had to go through if she was unable to conceive naturally. She would most likely never have been able to have children.

I have a married couple (friends) who the male sounds like he could have the same issues as DH (due to undescended testes). I listen to the talk about their efforts in TTC over the last 4 - 5 months and how they check each month via the good ol' POAS and I really want for them to not be in the same boat as us, but at the same time want to shake them and say "go get tested - don't leave it another year just find out NOW". DH is the same, but is starting to drop a few comments (not in a nasty way) but saying well a SA test wouldn;t hurt you know - just to rule any possible issues out. I'm keeping my mouth shut. They'll get tested when and if they need to and I'll be there to hold their hands if they do need to go down this path, but I don't want to steal that innocence from them earlier than it may (or may not) need to be.

Any-hoo. I am thankful that I live in this day and age and I'm going to start trying to see my IVf jorney in a more positive light from today on.

Possums sweets - I hope you can eventually find a way past your sadness. It may be that you won't enjoy the first 12 weeks, but I think there is a lot to be said for acceptance of situations that you cannot change. A saying I have for myself "I'm am learning to own this and I am trying to let it go".

You may not ever feel comfortable while within the first 12 weeks, but you know it and you also know there is nothing you can do to change it, so hopefully you will be able to learn to let go. Easier said than done, but I find that surrendering can sometime be liberating.

Anyway - Everything above said in love and support to you sweets.

X

Nixon- thanks, it's true, surrendering can be liberating...I am a fairly spiritual person and handing things over to the universe can sometimes lighten the load...i suppose when my turn comes aroudn again, that's what I'll need to do. Acceptance is something I am working on now...I think it will help with some of my anger etc

I think trying to view the IVF journey as a positive opportunity to have children, which we wouldnt have had years ago is certainly a helpful perspective also.

Nic, you are a wise one hun and i think we all strive for the happy ever after...no one could be more dedicated to that journey than the likes of us wicked women.

Possum, you are right...the universe can take a load of our shoulders and that is what i depend on most. I totally understand with the innocence stuff too. I think that is part of what we grieve for LTTTC...that loss of having the BLISS of Pregnancy. That devasted me, wanting to be normal and not having that chance.
We have other stuff though...the complete appreciation of the achievement when i comes our way among other things. I have learnt so much more about my body and health and hopefully the health of our child too. One day at a time i say. I have to remember each day that to get myself here has meant preparing myself to be able to go all the way/sustain the pregnancy....so i will. My hope is the same for all of you.
Love and Belly wishes to you all xoxo

Hippy Mum - My friend Sue runs a charity to help expectant mum's and it's all about being green (kind of) - not really sure how else to describe it but Sue is awesome and I don't know if you have already had a look at her site, but she may have some info on there about how to help you with your Dr/GP situation. Or email her and ask - I'm sure she would be able to help you. PS: She's located in Edinburgh.

BabyGROE - Helping Parents Make Natural Choices