the nightmare continues.....

Woooo Hooooo Ms Meredith!!!!

Such great news...I am so glad to read all is going well..:dance:

Meredith, so happy that you got such good news. I can only begin to imagine the rollercoaster ride you are on, goodluck I hope the bleeding eases up soon. Most times after the first trim is over you will find the bleeding eases as well. Remember to take it easy and get those feet up as much as possible. :clap::clap::clap: xxxxxx

Merideth, I've been stalking you for a week or so to see how everything was going and it's so good to hear those twins have pulled through! What strong little fighters you must have in there, just like their mummy :)

Oh hunny I can't tell you how thrilled I am to hear this wonderful wonderful news...
Hang in there little bubbas..your mummy and daddy want you to grow nice and strong and want to give you both big big cuddles in 7 months time ;)

Yay yay yay Meredith!!!!! I am sooooo thrilled for you! Sending you masses of sticky, healthy baby vibes :hug:

I have been following your day to day nightmare for awhile now. I must say you are such a strong woman but i sence how drained you are. God im so glad to hear that both baby are doing great. Feet up and take it easy xxxx

Wow what wonderful news!!! I came in here hoping that you had one bub doing well but found 2!!!!!

Meredith: That is really amazing - can only repeat what another lady has already said - it really shows that your little bubs have such a strong mum. Sending lots of :hug: and sticky vibes. Hope your DH is okay as well.

Sara

Thankyou ladies so so much. Its amazing to have so many people all cheering our babies on. I am extremely grateful to you all for following my journey.
Touch wood, am doing ok past couple of days other than horrendous m/s which although is certainly a good sign, can't fool a "pro" like me into believing all is and wil be ok.
Had another very quick scan with FS today. both babies have good strong HBs. They did measure quite a few days behind even where they were 2 days ago but I am trying not to read to much into that given the u/s machine not nearly as good and don't think my FS prob as good at getting 'best" measurement compared to professional sonographer. Worried me a bit through today but my logical brain can't fathom that they would "shrink" in 2 days whilst still alive and hearts beating well ?
Hopefully no more scans until my first OB appt next week.

Wishing you all the best hun..

That's fantastic news!!!

Oh Meredith thats fantastic news!!! I think you're right re: the measurements most likely just the skill of doing the job..they couldn't shrink...when babies are soo small at that stage I am sure the smallest error would be very easy to make giving the difference in size.

Just read your story and its so wonderful to hear something good come out of a situation that could be so much worse. Best wishes to you!

Meredith glad to hear thinks are looking more promising for you and bubs. I hope the worry can begin to lessen a bit day by day. It is such a hard journey for some like yourself to motherhood xx

Oh Meredith, I am so very happy for you and wish you all the very very best. Grow strong little babies your mummy loves you so very much.

Meredith - as a long term follower I had to post. Wishing you all the luck and sticky vibes there are! Take all the support you can muster you deserve it:pray:

Hugs Meredith and thinking of you! Stay strong little bubbas!

Aggggggghhhhhhhh this horrible yet miraculous saga continues. After surviving the last week,I started bleeding heavily again this afternoon. Pouring out for about 45mins and now eased to a trickle. The u/s clinic knows me well by now so was squeezed in not long ago. By some miracle, my two precious bubbas are doing fine. Both measuring exactly 8wks( which I am today) with HRs of 170 and 180ish. Not able to see any source of bleeding today which is amazing given how much was coming out but I am not complaining.
I guess i may have to accept that this is going to keep happening on about a weekly basis but worried that i am going to somehow "use up" all the luck these babies have had so far. Please hang in there little ones, please please!!! I am not sure my heart can take much more.
DH admitted to me yesterday that he is emotionally "worn out" by this whole baby journey and hence the common perception by me that he has little empathy..... he has literally run out of compassion. I can understand because I am well past being worn out too but makes it hard when we both need support right now that neither can provide.

Meredith, what an incredible journey you're on - what a rollercoaster. I hope that you and dh are able to relax soon and recharge and get to a point where you can stop worrying.

So happy to hear that those two little miracles are happy and strong in there. I think how your DH feels is how many men feel. It just is so difficult. Often men don't have the same drive to procreate as we do. It's tough. Meet in the middle with your differences - try to accept that you are journeying the same path - but doing it differently. A day at a time. You are 8 weeks - YIPPPEEE!!!!!
I know that you will not feel "safe" until these babies are in your arms - but until then we are all here. We get it. You ARE supported... :hug:

Meredith, 2 of my friends from MG got pg with twins last year and both had quite a bit of bleeding early on, one had 2 boys last month and the other one's girls are at 33 weeks gestation now so it can happen.
Good luck, I can perfectly understand you DH's feelings, these babies better be VERY placid to make up for this LOL

Hi hun, sounds very much like Bel, she is with twins too...early on lots of bleeding but everytime u/s just show babies are doing well..I hope you soon will pass this stage and truely enjoy your pregnancy!

Be gentle on DH and take good care of each other as you can, it is understandable that you are both feel worn out...:hug: its also good that he express that feeling to you, you know men usually is 'bottle up inside and never tell' type...thinking of you hun.

Meredith - I think I have told you before of the woman I saw who bled so much during her pregnancy no one could believe her baby was alive, well and growing normally with no source of bleeding able to be found.

The positive - you are 8 weeks pregnant :D Your twins are growing well and HB are good. One day closer :hug:

As for you and DH - I can only imagine how worn out you both are by this journey :comfort: Support each other as much as you can but remember that there are many of us here holding your hand. We understand even if our paths are different :hug:

Hang in there Meredith, and remember you have other sources of support when DH is feeling too worn down to be there :hug:

Meredith - I'm so glad to hear that your babies are still doing well. I can't imagine how scary the bleeding is, and how difficult this is for you & your DH. I think that's it's really helpful that he explained how he is feeling. People (especially men & women) are different - I think problems often come from not understanding where the other person is coming from because you are in a completely different mindset. But you both have explained to each other how you feel, which at least should make you both more understanding.

Spoke waaay to soon yesterday. not long after doing that post, the bleeding started up again and just continued to get worse and worse until everything was soaked with blood. Ended up taken by ambulance to hospital. Awful, awful,awful internal exam showed cervix open and Dr fairly sure she found "foetal tissue" amongst the massive blood clots. Obviously everyone assumed the worse and were even talking D&C given the level of bleeding, however there was noooooo way I was agreeing to that without u/s. Couldn't do a scan last night and took lots of hassling to eventually get one around 11am today......
The news is equally good and bad. One of our little fighters has gone completely - not even a sac, nothing left to even indicate he/she was ever in there. The other, however, is currently still ok. Measuring exactly 8w1d so has grown since yesterday and HR 182. A couple of smallish blood clots visible but sonogrpaher didn't think to bad given what had happened. I am still in shock really. Totally crushed how things can change so much in the space of a few hrs. Our precious bubba was fine only hrs before leaving us and we will never get an explanation. Yet, I am also amazed by the miracle of a baby that stuck it out through that horrendous ordeal. My hopeful brain thinks its gotta make it given what its been through but my rational brain accepts to 50:50 chance my OB has given us. I so, so, so wanted BOTH these babies but I know I should be very grateful for the hope we still have.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious little one, and i hope the other wee babe stays good and tight. It sounds like a very frightening ordeal you've been through, and I hope you are able to stay physically strong with such a lot of bleeding and pain to deal with.

Meredith - I am so very sorry you have lost one of your babies, and still relieved there is a small positive to cling to :hug: It is perfectly ok to grieve the loss of a much wanted baby. I am hoping the physical side of you is holding up as I know the emotional one will be taking a battering. Praying for you and your little one xx

Sorry to hear of your loss. I can't believe you've been through so much. Please be kind to yourself, grieve when you need to hon. I am praying desperately that your little bubble remains sticky for you.

OMG Meredith you have been through the roughest roller coaster ride ever. I'm so very sorry that one of your precious much wanted little bubba has grown their tiny angel wings :hug: I am praying so hard that your little bubba is tucked in sooooooooo tight and stays that way for the next 7 months or so hun. Please be gentle with yourself and DH...You both have been through so so much..We are all here for you :hug:

Meredith, :hug:, I am so very sorry to learn of the loss of yet another precious baby. I know there are no words, but know that my thoughts and prayers continue to be with you.

BW

OMG Meredith, I am so truly sorry that one of your twins did not make it.
:pray: so hard that the little mite is fighter after all that has happened.

Oh Meredith, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Words cannot express how deeply saddenned I am yet again for you and Chris :(

I will pray and pray for your other little fighter xx

Oh my goodness Meredith. :comfort:

I am sorry your little one couldn't stay with you. Fly safely little one... :hug:

Words are failing me with what you are going through. Just know I am loving and supporting you from afar. Do what you need to get through this time - & know that we are here for you... :hug:

:hug:

Meredith I am so very sorry you have lost one of your precious babies :(

I am praying that this little one will hold on nice and tight :hug:

Meredith - how terrifying for you and your DH. I'm so sorry that one little baby didn't make it - it's terribly sad. I am :pray: that the other twin sticks and makes it. This one seems to be such a fighter!

Just sending your a massive cyber hugs and prayers Meredith...:hug: knowing that my thoughts are with you...

Thankyou once again girls for the endless support. I am in real need right now.
The initial shock etc of the past 48hrs has passed now and today I just feel incredibly sad and empty.
I still feel hope that our little one is ok in there but the grief of what was we have lost has hit me hard. Even if this one somehow (please, please) makes it all the way, how do I ever get over the loss with constant reminders at every milestone (12wks, 20wks etc). I will be faced with scans showing only the one every time. I know, I know that I am extremely lucky to even have the chance with this one but I can still see our little angel with heart beating happily only hrs before we lost him/her. I just can't take this emotional strain to much longer.

I am so sorry you are going through this, I can only imagine how hard this is, and I am sorry I have no words of wisdom for you... I can only offer a huge :hug: and let you know you are not alone. Hang in there little Meredith and little bubba... xo