Pregnancy after Miscarriage or Loss June 2010

Hoping: YAY!! That's such good news, must be a massive relief!

Angelfish: Your b/f doesn't sound like the most understanding person, I hope you guys can work something out so you feel more supported.

Dory: I LOVE seeing your ticker click over, so awesome :) I'm sorry about your furbaby's big trip to the vet. George has been so annoying lately I'd happily give him to someone else for 3 weeks! DH was home on school holidays so he got stacks of attention and love and now it's back to just us being at home and I don't let him sleep on my belly and knead my chest, or bite my hands or attack my feet - I'm just NO FUN for that cat anymore! I used to love him sleeping on me, but then with MS it just got too much! And my grandma just sent a toy tiger she knitted to us (soooo cute!) and George is very unhappy that I wont let him rip it's nose off! Such a mean mummy I am now, LOL! Yesterday I called him and he looked at me and then turned his back with his tail swishing away like crazy, he sure manages to make his feelings known! I'm hoping in another week or two I wont be as sick and I'll have more energy to give him (he's in the corner at the moment ripping up the wrapping the tiger came in, I'm willing to let it go in order give the toy tiger some peace!)

Eliselouise: Your so close! EEeeee!

Audax: You left work yet hon?

AFM - 1st OB appointment booked for 5th August, I'll be almost 17 weeks, really really hoping the ob has an ultrasound in their rooms! Well, firstly I'm hoping that Tiger is doing fabulously, then I hope I get see him/her doing fabulously. MS is still making an appearance, I was very silly and had fish and chips last night so had a rough night and morning with MS, and still getting some very sore boobage! I don't know if I've felt movement yet, when I lie down on my side I can feel a sort of squirmy nudge thing happening, but can't be certain it's Tiger given the extremely high potential that it's gas. I get pain in my groin sometimes though, and maybe some round ligament pain? On bellybuddies some ppl said that when they have pain in their groin that it was the baby being down low? I have two big pieces of news - 1st day of the SECOND TRIMESTER today! Which is just happy craziness. AND I brought my first pair of maternity jeans, cos mine were getting so uncomfy that I started wearing DH's and he's 6''2 and I'm definitely not, so I looked kinda silly! I've also learn not to ask DH's opinion of maternity dresses - ''that's a pretty sack''. Must go do some study while I'm awake - there aint that many hours in the day when I am!

Angelfish - its so awesome to hear the little heart beat, its amazing how fast it beats.

Kit - great news about reaching your first big milestone. I found maternity clothes shopping an absolute nightmare with my first bub. I'm only a year younger than you and it was so hard to find nice clothes that didn't make me look like a nanna! And its so expensive! I'm hoping this time i will be able to find some much nicer things.

Hi to everyone else :)

Hello from Heartburn Central! :lol:

I have 10 days of full time work left, then it's up to me how much I work for the 5 weeks after that. Right now it feels like it won't be very much!

I hate my maternity clothes. Jeans especially. I have given up all attempts to be a style goddess and am just frumping about now. At least I'm comfortable.

Kit - my m/s died off at 14w5d, so hopefully yours is due to end soon too! Glad that little tiger is going well, hope you feel some movement soon. OUr little bouncer is dancing abotu now, no doubt saying hi to all you ladies!

Audax im hearing ya on the heartburn, its horrible. Ive had it throughout the whole pregnancy but its just gotten worse the past couple of weeks, acid and all. I got some tablets prescribed from my doc which are safe and they help. There called Ranitidine if you want to ask about them, but other than that my dr also suggested Double strength Mylanta which also helps out quite a bit. Im hating Jeans at the moment too, im living in my trackies and feeling very frumpy and big. DP said to me the other day 'why dont you wear your jeans anymore' If he had a big belly sticking out he wouldnt be wearing jeans either haha
Kit sorry to hear your still suffering from ms, thats not fun at all. Hopefully it doesnt hang around for too much longer. Yay to buying maternity clothes. Ive bought quite a few items but havent really worn my Jeans the last few weeks coz my trackies are just so much comfier. I wish i could wear DP's trackies but hes smaller than me so not gonna happen hehe.
Hello to everyone else and have a great weekend all, looking forward to the nice weather tomoro :)

Mummyof4 – yeah, boy bits! Go the boys club.

Eliselouise – sounds like progress, head down bum up.

Hoping – woohooo. Great result. Hope you can relax a bit more with each new week.

Audax – “Hi little bouncer bubs”. Go baby for the glamour shots. Lifetime of vanity ahead. Lol.

Angelfish – Is your b/f really stressed out, worried or really busy? I just can't work him out... Hugs for you :hug:

Kit – I don’t know whether Tiger (with the spotty identity crisis) will be impressed, gas or movement? Hahaha. Congrats on entering the 2nd trimester. And damn, yummy yummy fish and chips. Mmmm lots of salt..

AFM – starting to tell a few people about preg. The special people in my life.

Been off work all since Monday because I've had the flu. My doc wrote up a script for Amoxyl which I haven’t used, as he said its most likely viral but didn’t like the sound of green phlegm (sorry if TMI). It looks like it has run its course. So fingers crossed for the next few days, so I can get some more energy and back to work on Tuesday. Oh feeling so fragile and prescious, well just a little bit :lol: (I've had lots of attention) ... DH has really looked after me.

timeforfamilyno he is just that way he is he is set in his ways and that is it. He is not worried he thinks that if the baby is going to make it it will and if wont then nothing to worry about becouse it was not alive in his way of thinking which i think is very messed up

afm the heartbeat that i heard was very fait and now with that thing i cant hear anything now yes i am scared but i know that it was cheap. I am very tired now more so then before. i am counting down to my next u/s

angelfish, my doctor couldn't find our baby's heartbeat at 16 weeks with her proper Doppler. She heard what I thought was a hb, but she said that it was just the placenta she had found; I couldn't tell the difference (I can now) So I wouldn't stress too much.

DH finally felt the baby kick last night! One almighty one, and then, cheeky little monkey, kicked to the left of his hand a few times, so I moved his hand over, only to have the baby start kicking to the right of his hand! Soooo funny!

Hi Everyone

Milly5 - It's nice to be able to talk honestly about pregnancy. On the TTC boards I would read some posts commenting about pregnant people around them complaining about pregnancy. Usually the poster was unsympathetic but I always was because I really don't like being pregnant. I am only 155cm and by 20 weeks I couldn't breathe properly as the baby pushed against my diaphram, didn't fall asleep until 2 or 3 in the morning and couldn't even walk to the shops as my uterus would contract like a closed fist if I exerted myself. And I don't think I even had it hard as I didn't have a lot of sickness like some poor people do. I am grateful I got to have the experience as nothing compares to it but if I could push a fast forward button and have this baby in my arms today I think I would do it.

Mummyof4 - Oh for the bliss of the ignorant pregnancy, before anything went wrong or babies were lost. I used to look forward to scans but now, like you, I dread them as i fear bad news. Glad to hear this one was fine though.

Iona - Hey sweetie, how are you? Hoping to have you back with us soon.

Dory - I didn't really have morning sickness with my first pregnancy with DD but I think I knew what it felt like when I had the GTT test. That stuff made me feel awful and they stuck me in a warm room and I had to sit for two hours feeling dizzy and nauseous. Glad it didn't make you feel too bad.

EliseLouise - Good to hear the head is down. My DD left it until the last week to turn. It's a relief to have it happen earlier.

Hoping - That's a great heartbeat. Sounds like a healthy bub.

Angelfish - I would hide that doppler until you are much further along. If you listen now and can't hear a heartbeat (which is normal) you might only stress yourself further.

Kitfaerie - We get Fish and Chips every Friday (that's the Catholic girl in me) but for a couple of months i couldn't stomach the idea of a fry up so this week was the first week I said DH could go and get it. I didn't feel too bad afterwards either though I couldn't eat as much of it as i usually do.

Also, I got a lot of the ligament pain with DD. It got so painful at one point I went and had it checked out because I got worried it might be something like appendicitis that I was ignoring but no, it was just ligament pain.

Audix - Hello Heartburn Central. I can remember DH and I spooning in bed one night and DD kept kicking him really hard in the back. It was so funny.

Timeforafamily - Sorry to hear you have the flu. Hope you are feeling better. Did anyone get a recommendation to have a flu shot or a swine flu shot? I forgot to ask the OB about it.

AFM - I got past that horrible 11th week and am now 12 weeks. It's a good sign obviously but I am still very apprehensive about my 12 week scan coming up on Tuesday. Once again I have got DH to take time off work to drive me in case it's bad news. I'm just going to hold my breath until they tell me baby has a heartbeat.

Garrrr, Sammy, 12 weeks already! Fingers crossed for that scan!
On the opposite side of sympathy, a couple of girls at work don't know about our past, and will say stuff like "isn't it awful?" And I have to change the subject really quickly, because I have trouble accepting the sympathy. Half of me hates being at work with everyone around me doing my work for me, but the other half wants to hang around, because it actually won't be any easier for them when I'm gone.

There's a disco party in my belly! I think it's all the tea I've been drinking today. I'm having a tea and stitches day. As in sewing, not sutured skin :lol:

i have hide then doppler it was cheap. I just have a question and i know that it might sound stupid but i am 10 weeks going on 11 should i be showing at all? when i feel my stomch i dont feel anything is that bad please be honest.

hey Angelfish. The uterus doesnt get big enough to leave the pelvis (below the pubic bone) until 12weeks and only then can you start to feel the smallest orange sort of shape. Some women dont look at all pregnant until 20weeks. Im 16 on friday and im normally a size 12/14 and i am just looking a little 'winter' chunky if you get what i mean? I am hoping to hid it til 20weeks and this is my 4th bubba.

Dont stress!

Just been thinking that its been quiet in here and then saw its the june thread? did i miss something? Is there a July thread??

tegam thank you i have seen on here other women who have been at my week that can feel the uterus already so i was kinda of worried. i know that i worry allot but after loseing one so close to this one i worry about everything

Angelfish dont worry hun, everyone is different. I didnt actually show untill about 20 weeks or after and couldnt really even notice it myself until about 14 weeks. I know its hard not too stress when youve already lost one little angel but just think when you get to where i am youll be wondering why you wanted to be showing. Im feeling huge now and its so uncomfortable (even though everyone keeps saying "gosh your tiny for 35 weeks")
Tegam no theres no other thread that im aware of, it probably just hasnt been updated recently. This thread is like that at times, sometimes really busy and you cant keep up and other times so quiet that you wonder whats going on :)
AFM feeling pretty good, looking forward to this week being over and not having to work anymore. Have had alot of hip and back pain through the night so finding it hard to sleep but at least when im not working ill be able to snooze through the day too so it wont be as bad.
Take care everyone, talk soon

Hi all - well I pretty much have been moping in the absence of my little fur baby! Pathetic... but somehow I am enjoying being so self indulgent. But the good news is he's apparently doing well in his little radioactive bunker - things going in one end and coming out the other and not too much of a hell raiser. Thanks for asking KIT - I'd have George, but my other furries might get upset.

Sammy P - well done on reaching a milestone.... it does get better as the pregnancy progresses, but I found I found "other" things to worry about!

Audax - loving little bubs kicking DH... hee hee. I actually makes it real for them.

Angel - in my second pregnancy, I was hardly showing at 22 weeks.. I was sooooooo disappointed. But don't worry, the more pregnancies you have the earlier you show.... this time around I had a little pud at 6 weeks which people at work were noticing and so was I as I wasn't fitting into clothes I was fitting into only 2 weeks ago. And I had lots of intense nausea, so wasn't eating much at all.

Teagm - I agree with Elise - no other threads! I hope you get to hide for that long too! Maybe part of my problem was so many pregnancies in such a short time, even though they didn't get to term, they got far enough to stretch everything.

I am not sure who said it on the last page, they were talking about sore breasts? I still have them, but the intensity varies.

Kit - I understand why you wouldn't let George on your chest/tummy whilst feeling ill. I had long term nausea a few years ago and I was forever pushing the fur babies off my chest/tummy, and eventually they got the message and curled up on/in between my legs. I really loved the fact that they kept me company during my many sleepness nights, but like you there is a limit. A girl has to look after herself.

I had a really good Obs visit on Friday - things are just going swimmningly and bubs even put on an acrobatics show for the obs ..... go little disco baby.

Sorry if I've missed anyone... it's not intentional.

Elise - I hear you girl, about being a little uncomfortable at night - I also get pins and needles in my arms, but if I move them they go away. But I don't worry about it, as I don't have to be at work or anywhere at all, so if I don't feel well I just stay in bed in my pj's - a girl has to be comfortable. Which is after all what my Obs wants - rest and comfort. I was talking to DH this morning and realised I am going to have to shift my thinking very soon. For so long for me, the signs of labour have meant emergency and sadness... and as this pregnancy progresses, all those signs and symptoms that I have been so scared of happening, will actually be good things and herald the imminent arrival of this precious little one. That is really a big shift I need to make.....but it sure is exciting.

wow Dory you are so right! It will be a big shift and one i guess you wont know if you have made completely until the time comes. But its ok to have a few more weeks. When you "feel" baby is ready then you will be able to process the fact that its ok to let go! Labour is an amazing journey that should ALWAYS come with a beautiful reward. I am sorry that you havent got to experience that YET! 9more weeks and you can tell us all about it! Woo hoo you are one stronge women!

hi girls havent got much tim inbetween cookin and keeping my little ones happy, i have another scan on friday i pushed for another one lol, just want to make sure bub is ok, and given my history of m/c's since ttc in nov/dec i think i have the right to be wanting another scan to make sure things are a ok! m/s is just as bad which not complaining just wishing i was able to eat without feeling sick, but doing well with my fizzy drinks and m/s tablet only throwing up once and that was when i forgot my tablet lol. 8 weeks today yay! another week closer to the end of the 1st trimester so excited i did a naughty thing and bought more unisex outfits but were so cheap i couldnt ignore! i hope everyone is going good, and bubs are doing well!

Congrats on 8 weeks Huni!
I say have as many scans as you need!

I know i will be regreating wanting to show later on.

AFMi am still very tired and ms is always here next week i will have a u/s i wish that i could have it sooner i cant wait.

Just popping in to see how you are all doing, I've been lurking but not posting much these days (too tired to think properly). I'm so glad to read that everyone has been doing well since I last posted, and having good scans and seeing heartbeats. I can't believe how far along some of you are now, time is flying! Well done, hope all this good news continnues. Also hoping I have some news of my own very soon in the form of a birth announcement. Take care :)

Ooh Twinsister you are so close, cant wait to see your BA, very exciting. Hope all goes well for you hunni as im sure it will xx

Thanks Elise, I can't believe you are already 35 weeks! Won't be long for you now either!!

Hi girls,

I'm going to tip toe back in here real slow....I got a :bfp: last wed (11 dpo) and the line (and the other 5) was a lot stronger than the +'s I had last month....and I have had no spotting yay!!

So at the moment I am 4 weeks 4 days, so hoping this is third time lucky

IONA!!!!! FREAKING AWESOME! So happy for you honey, glad the lines are stronger and your feeling positive! Eeeeee!!

Afm, sadly my grandpa passed away so DH, sister and her DP and I are heading to QLD for the funeral, it's very sad but he lived a long and happy life, so it's a celebration as well. Looking forward to seeing everyone and oh so slightly scared about throwing up or stinking out the entire plane on the way there! I'll just gesture towards DH and smile a lot, lol.

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IONA!!!!! FREAKING AWESOME! So happy for you honey, glad the lines are stronger and your feeling positive! Eeeeee!! .

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Could not have said this any better LOL!

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Afm, sadly my grandpa passed away so DH, sister and her DP and I are heading to QLD for the funeral, it's very sad but he lived a long and happy life, so it's a celebration as well. Looking forward to seeing everyone and oh so slightly scared about throwing up or stinking out the entire plane on the way there! I'll just gesture towards DH and smile a lot, lol.

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Through up on a plane with DD1. Was so gross, in one of those bags LOL.... :redface:

thanks kit - I can't believe your already at 14 weeks (where has the time gone). So sorry to hear about your grandpa, sending you heaps of hugs to you and your family and hopefully your flight etc won't be too bad

thanks tegam
xoxox

yay Iona welcome back! i really hope this one is the one for you! sending lots of positive and sticky vibes hun xxx

Welcome back Iona, thats great news. Heres to a H&H 9 months.
Kit sorry to hear about your grandpa, hopefully you have a lovely celebration of his life and enjoy catching up with family.
Twinsis yep 35 weeks, it has absolutely flown by. I start maternity leave at the end of this week so i think that will slow things down a bit but hoping not :)

Congrats Iona, that's fantastic news!!!!

Kit - sorry to hear about your grandpa. Hope the plane ride goes well.

Elise - yay for mat leave, enjoy your time off

Kit, so sorry to read of your Granfather's passing XXXX

Iona, CONGRATULATIONS honey well done!!!!! Sending you loads of sticky Vibes XXXXX

Hi to everyone, I'm on the very quiet side, but doing well X Love to you all X

Hi Iona, great to see you making a 'come back!'
Kit: sorry to hear about your granddad. Hope the trip goes ok. Glad to see you are doing well.
Murraycod: have often thought of you but wanted to respect your 'quiet time' so didn't PM you... but relieved to hear you are going well.
Twinsister: GL for the birth. Looking forward to your BA.
ELiselouise: Yay for stopping work!
SammyP: glad you have got past your difficult week.
Hi to everyone else. Still lurking a bit : )

thanks ladies for the welcome

murray - I'd wondered where you had got to - oh you are so close to the the 2nd trimester, how are you travelling??

Thanks for the well wishes :). We actually have a bit of a stomach bug in our house right now so I'm a bit relieved baby is taking its time to get here. I'd rather we all be healthy when he/she makes finally makes an appearance.

Murray - I was wondering where you were too. Glad to hear all is going well.

Ionna - CONGRATULATIONS girl. Awesome! Believe, believe in every moment and day! I am so happy for you.

Murray - OMG girl - almost 12 weeks. That is sooooooooooooooooo awesome. How are you feeling? How is Mr Cod? How is little cod? When is your morphology scan?
I have a scan next week.... and honestly I am pretty excited about it. It's on the same day and same place as the day we first met our wee little Nicholas, but DH and I discussed it and thought we'd be ok about the coincidence. I have taken the view it's a nice way to honour and celebrate the memory of our little man.

Twin sis - sory about the tummy bug in your home at the moment - hope you haven't got it! I just can't wait to get to 40 weeks and feel so big and uncomfortable! I am excited for you... waiting for your BA.

Elise - I bet time is moving forward so slowly for you at the mo! How are you going?

Kit - oh sweetie. I am so sorry about your grandpa, it always sad when a loved one dies, but you are good to remember your grandpa's life and honour his memory. When I was a teenage I went to the funeral of the wife of a friend of our family. They were "old", and at the wake I spoke to the husband, and was really struck by how positively and lovingly he was able to celebrate the life of his wife and their time together. It was the first time ever I had experienced anything like it and it has stayed with me. He was still sad and bereft, but there was so much love. How ironic it was to become such an important lesson for me? It will be really good for you to catch up with family. Hopefully QLD turns on its best winter weather for you. I hope you'll be ok on the plane too.... I haven't had the pleasure of having to puke on a plane. But you'll be ok. Just be prepared just in case - take your tooth brush and some water and some mints, to freshen your mouth up and maybe some handwipes/face washer, so you can freshen up your face as well? Not sure what else might help you manage. I find peppermint tea/mints help. I used to take ginger tablets too - and they helped. Not sure if you can take them during pregnancy, but am pretty sure you can. But try them before you fly just in case they don't agree with you! What are you going to do with George when you're away?

Teagm - thanks for your kind words. I am lucky enough to have experienced labour twice already.... I am looking forward to it this time around. I agree with your comments, it was totally life changing for me and DH. But honestly in the end, the most important thing for us is the safe delivery of our little bundle into this world.

Possum - good to hear from you!

Sammy P - glad you got through a tough week. Hugs your way!

AFM - am coping well enough with the absence of my little fur baby ( only 2 weeks and 1 day til he comes home!) and I call the vets every day to check how he's going. DH can visit him tomorrow for 30 mins a day! I have a little cold at the moment, and feel a miserable. I know what a softie! I have the luxury of being able to rest, and feel miserable.

Iona - congratulations that is wonderful news :)

Kit - sorry to hear about your loss but its great to hear you speaking about celebrating his life, after all i think thats how we all would want to be remebered in the end.

Dory - glad to hear you are coping without your little fur baby at the moment. We have 4 dogs and i cant image being without them for 3 weeks. We sadly had to put one of our dogs down a week after i miscarried and it was so hard to see her go at a time when i needed her. But i think she is now looking after my little baby just as she used to look after me.

I have a quick question?

How do all you lovely ladies cope when talking about the number of kids you have?

I really get distressed by saying "this is our 4th" because there are those two lovely angels out there! But you know you cant say that to a stranger?

Do you understand my distress?

Like Dory: WHat about when people say "oh is this your first?"

Do you feel like screaming? crying? Sometimes i feel like i am going to be sick?

Sorry for the downer....

Teagm - that is the toughest question to answer. The answer I give depends on the context and how I am feeling.

I have been really blunt previously, but that has been in response to a direct question " have you been off having a baby?" to which I replied " yes and she died" or later "yes and they died". The other day at the pathology lab, I was asked "is this your first pregnancy? And I responded , "the first that has gotten this far" only to be greeted with an awkward "oh". But other times, I just smile and say "yes", even though I feel like I am not honouring my angels when I do. For me it really depends on context and how I am feeling. Do I feel like explaining my history? Do I feel like having to manage that awkward silence when I do explain my history? Am I up to explaining my history? Does it matter to me if the person who asks knows my history? Is the person asking out of politeness or curiosity?

DH and I are attending a Baby PPP program and the other day the facilitators handed out birth notices cards that we can complete and send into to the facilitators so they can keep a track of things as there is a post partum component of the program. It's basically we just have to complete the blanks, but the wording is " are pleased to announce the birth of our firstborn child". I was really perturbed by the wording and actually am still uncomfortable with it. To be accepted into the course we didn't have to explain any past difficulties, just whether there had been any major issues with this pregnancy, so n one knows our history and we're not intending to share it.

It's just such an emotive question when you've had a loss, but for most people it's just an innocent question and a way of making conversation. So just remember that when they ask. For some reason it's acceptable to ask those sorts of questions in the broader community. Sometimes I actually think people are genuinely interested in your answer too, rather than just making conversation or having their chance to stand on a soap box and give advice.

I often feel like doing all of the things you describe... and also running away.... but those are the times I usually try to face my fear head on. I have this bizzare need not to let it overwhelm me. I think I am just to stubborn for my own good sometimes.

And by the way, for me it's not a downer and you don't need to apologise to me. If you are feeling sad then this of all places is the place you are free to let it out. Big hugs.

Hoping - oh sweetie - how sad. It's ironic, we had a cat that died suddenly in 2006 when we were away on holidays and after Amelia, it really helped me when DH would talk about our cat looking out for Amelia and then subsequently Nicholas and Sophie. In fact it still helps and now included little Sprite. Just like you. Odd the sort of things we can find comfort in isn't it? Send your poochie some nice angel pats for me.

Oh how oh how are you such a wise women Dory!

Every word made sense. I need time to let it settle before i reply!

But thank you for sharing your soul again and again for all of us!

Iona congrats... I am so happy for you.
Kit i am so sorry for you loss.

afm i am changing obs this one that i had was not staying ontop of things and i just had a bad feeling about him. So i got refered to a high risk ob. On Monday i got to see the baby and i saw it move and heard it's hb. I am 11 weeks now cant wait for this frist trimester to be over with i know i am not in the free in clear.

Hi Ladies, I am a lurker hoping to join you soon :-)
Tegam - I think when people ask you in a casual situation how many kids you have, they mean "living kids", they are just trying to figure out what your family looks like. I always tell them one, because the uncomfortable silence that would follow any mention of the miscarriage would be more uncomfortable for me than for them. I have lost my father when I was a very small child, and then when people asked me "what does your dad do" and I would say "he is dead" it was always very akward. I imagine it would be similar if I said "I have one living child and two angel babies" so I'd rather not drag them into the akwardness plus I do not want people to look at me with this "you poor thing" look at their faces. Never liked it.
When a doctor asks, then I tell them of course.