I am going to Melbourne on Monday for a tertiary scan. This scan is a specialised scan that's ultra sensitive. The reason for me having this scan done is that at 22w, my normal scan showed that one of my baby's brain ventricles was on the high end of normal.
At that point in time, noone was at all concerned, and it was just suggested that my baby have a scan within his first few weeks of life.
2 weeks ago, the obs overlooking my pregnancy at the hospital (that I havehad absolutely NO contact with), decided that I should be sent to Melb for this scan, to check on bub's brain. I was happy, as it felt like everything was being taken seriously, and that we would know 100% of there were to be any problems at all with bubs.
I have had a very 'normal' pregnancy, with nothing going wrong ( apart from the 22 w scan.). I have been so so positive. Bub's kicks me over 30 times a day! I love watching my belly move!
I am just now starting to freak out a little bit. What if there is something wrong? What do I do? Will I lose my baby????
This is the first time I have really let myself think about this, and I am tearing up as I type. I am generally a very very happy person, but at the moment I am so so scared!! There really is no reason for me to even think that I will lose my baby... but I just can't help it. I am one of those people that always thinks of the most negetive outcome, so that if anything was to happen, I wouldn't be so upset, as it could have been worse!
Sorry to ramble! I just can't relly share this with anyone sclose to me in my life... I don't want to get anyone upset or worried. I keep telling my self that if there were going to be any major problems, something would have been done by now. I guess it could just be a little bit of the hormones talking, and also the greif from my first lost. I know so many people go through much more painful things than I ever have, and I am sorry for being selfish. I just really need to get it out.
Anyway, I guess there's not much I can do until Monday. Fingers crossed that the brain ventricle is perfect and my bub is going to be one healthy little boy.
Thanks for listening. It means alot to be able to get this burden off my chest.
Awww Squishee :hugs: I was sent to Melbs for a scan too because they discovered clubfoot, and was told it is a soft marker for Trisomy 18. They wanted me to have an amnio and I refused because I didn't want to risk losing my little boy in case nothing else is wrong. I am just going to wait and see after he is born. I think about it all the time and sometimes wonder if I should have had the amnio and I always blame myself for causing the clubfoot even though it was not in my power. So I know how you feel hun. All I can say is best of luck on Monday and I hope all turns out well.
Take deep breaths hon, and feel assured that your carers, doctors, obs, everyone are just been super careful and eagle eyed over your little one.
Rest assured that you and everyone are doing everything possible to ensure your babe is fine.
Know that Monday is happening so to check things out as best as possible.
I really hope you can choose someone from your nearest and dearest to be your support person, just so you can talk it over with them and get some hugs and time out from all your thinking about it as well.
All the very best for Monday. I am choosing to believe that you will get the best possible outcome with the results and all will be well.
All the very best wishes Nicky. The Drs are doing every they can to help your bub and everything should be OK. Take care of yourself and it might help to have someone to talk to in person, even if you dont want to tell all the family etc.
Starting to stress
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