Discussions with our OB about your upcoming birth

[joel's girl]

Just wondering how other OB's seem to be working in relation to discussing the wishes of the mother.

At what point did your OB start discussing birth / labour options and preferences with you ??

Were you given sufficient time to do this before labour or not ??

Just interested.....

[StrawberryMumma]

Hi Joel's girl

Congrats on your pregnancy! Hope everything is going well.

I always wondered when my ob was going to ask what I wanted to do in regards to my labour and he never really did throughout my pregnancy! I guess he just assumed things would just go along as normal (probably as per hospital guidelines etc) so he never really asked. It got to my 36 wk app (I think) and that's when I thought maybe I should really bring up some questions and say what I want! otherwise this baby will be here! So it was at that app that we had a bit of a chat. I didn't have any major preferences anyway really, I just wanted to let things happen naturally, and we talked a bit about RL tabs and EPO. My ob was very laid back and didn't seem into a lot of unneccessary intervention so there wasn't really any really big decisions that HAD to be discussed, but I think that if I didn't bring things up at that app then we may have never discussed anything at all!

We also talked about some things when I was IN labour too. I only got to hospital 45 mins before DD was born and even in that little time we talked more about what I wanted.

All the best for your birth!

[BellyBelly]

I think its very important to discuss your wishes before you even choose your Ob but I am finding more and more, late in pregnancy, it is being discussed and women feel trapped in contibuing to use them as its too hard to change. There is a downloadable form on the main site, I think in the conception or pregnancy articles, about the questions you need to ask your Ob before choosing them.

Have you had some problems?

[joel's girl]

I'm one of those ppl Kelly, who didn't ask the appropriate questions before choosing a OB. It was very hard to get into an OB in my area, some ladies are turned away at just 6 or 7 weeks because the OB is already full for that month. So based on a good reputation I took an appointment with this OB and felt lucky to get into one at all........HOWEVER if given my time again, things would be very different. I had always thought that by paying into private health care, having a private OB and attending a private hospital would ensure me the best of available care - How wrong could I be, like I said, if I had my time again, I'd do things very differently.

I'm 38 weeks today and my OB is yet to discuss things with me, so like Lee I will be bringing them up at our next appointment. I was just interested to hear if this was standard for private Ob these days as I suspect it is ????

Don't worry though I have a detailed birth plan ready and have hired a doula so I'm as prepared and supported as I can be but just not by my OB.

[Ginger]

mine asked me about two weeks ago to come in with my birth plan. i think, to be fair, she was waiting until we had done our classes first- and we still have a week to go, and they tell you a lot about pain relief in the classes. so i think she was waiting until we had done that until we should tell her exactly what we wanted.i was surprised it was left that late to talk about birth options as well though..

[joel's girl]

That's a good point though Gracie. Thanks..........

[LizzysMum]

I am going with a birthing service with one to one midwife based care and we have talked about it all the way along. She is tops!!!

[JordieC]

My ob has discussed things with me but because most of the decisions being made will be medical ones and in the best interests for me or the baby I don't feel the need for a birth plan. I guess if you had certain things that you want to happen you cold bring it up whenever but I'm sure most obs would do simply what was right at the time. MOst girls I know who had birth plans said they didn't even look at them because they went with what happened on the day. Just another way of looking at it I guess!

[noobie]

As I've seen different midwifes and obs for every single appointment, I'm mainly concentrating on making sure my DH knows my thoughts about the birth, and including what he wants too. That way, even if we don't have an actual written birth plan, between both of us we should be able to make ourselves reasonably happy that we get some control over the proceedings no matter which midwife/ob is there.

If you have specific ideas and your ob hasn't offered a real opportunity to discuss them, I'd just makes sure that your support person knows what you want, which might just be a discussion or a detailed birth plan - whatever suits.

I'm thinking of having some sort of contingency "emergency code word" that I can use to revoke any of my pre-labour decisions. For example, due to how it makes me react, I really really don't want gas, *but* if on the day the gas suddenly seems extremely attractive I want my DH to be able to make sure I'm not being too hasty and remind me of why I don't want it, but then bring on the gas aplenty if I really can't cope. ;-)