Need lot's of advice from all brides and bridesmaids...

OK So I am very honored to be my sisters maid of honour for her wedding in feb 2010. She deserves every happiness and I want her day to be wonderful, easy and most importantly stress free so I have number of questions I am hoping you lovely ladies can help me with.

I will start with questions about the BIG DAY

So for the brides
what did your maid of honour do that you really appreciated?
What did they do that you wish they hadn't?
What did you wish they did do but didn't?

For the bridesmaids... I am quitely freaking out, not really sure what I am suppose to do on the day.

Am I suppose to personally oversee details like the flowers and cake at the reception? how the tables are set up at the table?
What should I have in my emergency kit for the bride, what sort of makeup etc....


Please any help from anyone would be appreciated. Thanks in advance

My MOH was an angel she helped me heaps!!! and so did 1 of my 2 bridesmaids!

MOH and helpful bridesmaid came looking at dresses with me. MOH had a baby who was 9 months old at my wedding so came places with a little baby.

helpful bridesmaid took my dress to her house to keep till the day (as my parents live 2 and 1/2 hrs away from us so 4 hrs away from wedding was and were going to have full car)

These 2 great girls organised an awesome hens night and we all had a ball!!! Dinner at Hard rock and then a Booze cruise stripper cruise!!

MOH picked me up day before wedding with her DH and DS and drive me to where we were all staying the night before (girls and my parents and 1 brother and cousin)

On day she was one who kept me calm and checked on everything whenever asked to. She made sure i had some drinks of water and something to eat.

She did an amazing speech at wedding!!

Day after wedding she dropped bra and shoes around to me where we were staying a few nights before they drove all the way home, as silly me forgot to put them in bag that i left at home with DH to go in car, so all i had was corset and heals which i didnt think would go with jeans and tshirt LOL.

My dad and brother checked over reception early before we had to leave for wedding. Where we had wedding and reception were very professional and spot on no issues.

Emergency kit have bandaids, stockings, lipstick (chossen colour), mints, deoderant, tissues (give this to someone easily accecable and trustworthy.

I have been bridesmaid 3 times and each time have done different things depending on what has been asked of me! 1 was organised in 6 weeks so very casual, 1 all 3 brodesmaids lived hrs away from bride so we didnt relaly do anything as much as we offered, and other i organised hens night with her her sister who was MOH, and other little tasks.

I had 2 brides maids and they were FABULOUS...

A great thing they did was make sure i drank plenty of water.. It was a humid day, so every 30 mins or so in the lead up to the ceremony one of them would stick a straw in my mouth and tell me to suck. it was awesome that they didn't pressure me into champagne at 10am like some BMs do. if i'd drunk alcohol that early, i'd be OVER by the time the ceremony started.

i was a pretty relaxed bride, so they weren't under any strict instructions to help me, but they used so much initiative, i didn't even really need to ask.

one great thing one of them did was make me a wedding planning book, with sections for hair, dress, flowers etc so i could collate all of my ideas and not be frazzled when it came time to pick things. you can buy these books, but it was even nicer that she went to the effor to make it for me.

i walked on air all day and felt calm and relaxed and i believe it had everything to do with my girls :)

hope this helps! have fun with the planning becuase weddings are SUPPOSED to be fun! remind her of that too when she starts hyperventilating over table settings :D

Sis was chief bridesmaid, cousin normal bridesmaid.

They are both lots of fun, you can see we're enjoying ourselves on a lot of the photos the family took!

They were both happy to spend a few hours looking for dresses - they picked the pattern and agreed to wear dark green and have a single white rose as a flower. I picked the material, the dressmaker did a great job and Mum organised stoles and shoes to match. I'm glad she did: the day was windy enough that a stole made a difference to a halterneck dress!

Cousin bought me a special wedding memories box - it contains an order of service, an invitation, the dried buttonholes, placenames, some cards, the champagne corks from all the bottles we drank that month, and a letter I wrote to DH just after the wedding. LMAO - he has NO idea because he NEVER looks in that box. It will be found at some point. It was going to be for our first anniversary but we'd just moved house and it was still in a box but maybe he'll find it one day.

I do wish... Sis had organised a hen night for me. The girl who did the reading at the service did that for me. But she didn't know any family so it was just a few of my friends that she did know. It was a great night but it could have been different.

That someone had pointed out part of my hair had kinked and smoothed it down for me.

That Sis hadn't crashed Mum's car the day we drove up (2 days prior) so the day before the wedding was "poor Sis, she's so hurt, I hope she'll be OK for the wedding." The day before should have been about ME!

Although Sis did help make the favours and she made all the place names, which looked FANTASTIC.

Thanks so much for your replies ladies and keep them coming.

We have already been looking for dresses and she is going to make a decision at the end of this month to make sure it gets here in time. :dance:

My sister is so relax that she doesn't have any idea what she wants me to do really hence I am here. Some really good suggestions, I was planning bringing out the champers early so we might have a glass and put it away, it has been known to be 42 degrees here in feb :doh:

See LZ these are great things to be aware, just cause I am such a dunce, any idea on how to smooth a kink? might have to write that down and ask the hairdresser

Love your emergency kit feeb.

My sister was MOH and I had 2 friends as Bridesmaids.

My sister and BM1 were fabulous. THey came wedding shopping with me at the drop of a hat, organised my hens night, helped with invitations and kept me calm. I appreciated everything they ddi for me during the lead up to the wedding.

Probably the best thing they did for me on the day, although I didn't appreciate it at the time, was not allow me to drink :rofl: Not even 1!

The other BM was a different story :rolleyes:

emergency kit:
eye drops (red eyes from crying = not a good look in photos!)
tampons (jic!)
bobby pins/safety pins
tissues
lipstick/gloss
lollies (sugar!)

my maids were great - they had to take me to the toilet to hold my dress and were very gracious!
they made sure my dress was always looking fab, I always had fresh lipstick on and they made me eat/drink :)

stuff some tissues in your dress somewhere in case the bride has a cry coming down the aisle.

I knew if I cried I'd ruin my makeup, so just didn't cry. If I knew Sis had make up remover, mascara and lipstick on her I'd have looked awful during the speeches. So that depends on the bride. As for my hair - I know how to fix it. You just need to put the offending bit back in place and whack a clip/grip over it if it's being stubborn. But someone should have just told me!

Awesome things - went out to a day spa and gave me hand and foot massages while there (she's on the dole and couldn't afford to pay for them!) Also, the reason I got her to do it (she's my sis) was because she has always been really good at calming me down in a panic, like when my friends locked me out of our room on the day. By accident, lol!
Things I wish she did : #1 turn up to the rehearsal!!! But that was a family issue, my mum was so hung up on seeing my dad again (they hadn't spoken for 18 months) that she screwed up a few things.
Some other friends organised a big girly sleepover the night before, including a bloody mary at breakfast the next day (which I love) I wish my sis had sorted that out.
MIL and SIL organised my hens do - sis lived too far away. It was an absolutely killer night - hilarious and had the best time. That was a lovely thing to do.

And of course dress shopping. I made my own dress, but still managed to go dress shopping 5 times! :lol:

I've just thought of one ruined wedding: the groom's mother and sister didn't turn up because they'd had a row with another family member. The sister was supposed to do the reading.

The groom took his wife's name - as his wife really liked her maiden name.

IF your future BiL has a volatile family, I would suggest that you secretly organise someone else to be able to do one of the readings last minute. Even memorise them yourself if you have to. Because that embarrassed the couple quite a bit when no-one was there to read. If someone else had stood up then it wouldn't have looked so bad and many people would have been unaware of the family problems.

:) My sis was 21 when I married and she did turn up to the rehersal... only to run around the Church and explore all the little nooks and crannies like "a lot of the younger bridesmaids like doing" (according to the very understanding vicar). So be careful what you wish for!

Thanks again ladies I am getting bits and pieces from everyone.

ZL - I will be sure to include some bobby pins in the emergency kits for the bumps ;)

I thought rehearsels were just for movies :redface: so will have to make sure sis is onto it.

I definitely have the dress shopping covered, we have been 3 times now and have at least another visit or 2 to the shops to make sure she is happy with her choice :lol:

Would love to do a sleep over but not sure how my dp will like it as he isn't happy at having to watch and get DS ready on the day :wall:

Feel free to keep the tips coming