So Thoroughly Shattered

Hey all,

Im so damn depressed. I am currently 38+2 weeks pregnant with baby number 5. Its been the pregnancy from hell, and I have been over it since the 5th month. Its a long time to be over something but still have to endure it.
My midwife decided weeks back that today she would give me a stretch and sweep. I was so looking forward to it. To have my body back without the horrendous SPD and severe pregnancy induced carple tunnel syndrome. To be able to eat without the heartburn that makes you vomit because its so bad, and sleep without being in excruciating pain. I barely slept last night because although I was nervous I was so excited too. To think that this may have been the last night I was pregnant for, and to think that in a 24 - 48 hour period I might be holding my bubba in my arms rather than my stomach. Ohhh the serenity of it all was awesome.
However when I went to my appointment today I was informed that my midwife would not perform one, because a lady that was supposed to be induced last week and declined had decided that this morning she wanted to be induced and because my midwife was having a "quiet" day she would do it. So Ive been bumped because she cant have 2 of us possibly in labour. I am absolutely shattered. I have cried all day and cant seem to pull myself together. Now I like to think Im a pretty reasonable person, and, well ok, I understand this woman is probably a higher priority than me, but cmon!! A little heads up would have been nice. So now I sit here thoroughly depressed thinking "drink castor oil" but dont worry, 1 I cant cause I dont have any, and secondly I think I would prefer to pass on adding any extra ailments to this pregnancy.
I know Im close to the end anyway and I know the baby will come when its ready, and yes I know the stretch and sweep may not have actually been successful, so please if you do write anything dont write any of that. I think it would make me cry more reading it :( I know I cant achieve anything here by writing all this and all other natural induction methods have failed, but I just needed to get all this out. Maybe it might help a little with the emotional side of things if I verbally expressed (or typed) this all.

Loads of :hug: I hope bub comes soon. Can you get the SnS tomorrow?

That would be gutting! Have you spoken about a S and S tomorrow instead? I hope that your bubba comes soon.

And good idea to stay away from the castor oil - with your luck it will just give you the runs!

:( :hug: hope they can do it soon for you

:hug: :hug: Hope you get your bubba in time for Christmas

:( I did ask about tomorrow but my midwife has decided she doesnt want a "looming birth" so close to christmas. She also decided to tell me that I didnt want a birthday a couple of days before christmas or on christmas day. It would be a blessing for me no matter what the day, all I can see is the sooner the better. She has booked me in again for the 29th but seeing as thats like 3 days before my due date its kind of like - well whats the point? I know I sound picky but I just need it over with. I need to meet my son. I need the broken sleep from the feeding, not from everything else :(

She's not the one having so much trouble. I'd renegotiate. Tomorrow or Friday, which works for her?

Is there a backup midwife available? Are you having a homebirth or hospital birth? Just wondering if there's someone else that can help.

I hope you can get in earlier than that. Your mental health is important too.

:hug:

I have everything crossed for you that you go into labour all by yourself soon, really soon.

Aww Tash. What a sweet beautiful woman you are. To comment on my whingy thread when you have been through so much more. My heart goes out to you!! You've written a beautiful account of your birth. I hope thing are getting easier for you and the days are getting a little brighter! xxxxx

Aww darling that sucks!!!
It's so annoying she can make the call "you don't want a birthday so close to Christmas" How is that her decision!! :HUGS:
I would give her a call tomorrow and explain how over it you are and how much pain you are going through and you want a S&S or another MW who will do one...

FX for you sweets and keep your chin up ok?! xxx

:hug: hun. I hear you about being over everything, and I'm only 36 wks, lol! I'm totally over everything too I have SPD and heart burn , aches and pains like I've never had during pg and I can understand your disappointment. I think a call to your MW tomorrow telling her how you're really feeling might be in order. If she doesn't listen, call someone else, maybe (if you're birthing in a hospital) the nursing unit manager (NUM) I calle dthe num at my hospital I will be birthing at when I couldn't get results from the midwives I was dealing with and she sorted things out for me in a matter of minutes! Can't guarentee that will be your out come, but definately tell them that your mental health is at stake!

I so understand your desperation to get baby out!! And I would have had a major melt down at that news too :( I hope things get moving for you really soon all the best

:hug: hun, really hope you have your bubba in your arms sooner rather then later.

Thanks all for your support. Really needed it today. I might just call again tomorrow and let her know its just not good enough. Fingers crossed she listens.

hugs hugs hugs

:hug: Good luck today. I remember what it's like to be at the end of it all & just willing that baby to be born. Just take it one day at a time. You won't be pregnant this time next month, and so on. :hug:

Has this woman not seem the pain yourve been through in the last few months?

I so dont get the 'medical' profession at times....we know our bodies grrrr

:comfort: here's to a certain little man deciding Christmas will be a great birthday to up the middy :ROFL:

How upsetting for you Leekee :hug: I remember the pain of very late pregnancy and SPD and completely understand why you want the baby out now. Hopefully you will go into natural labour and have a beautiful Christmas Eve or Christmas day baby, it's a great time to be born xx