An Unprofessional Consultant...

Hi All,

im a newbie to this site and posting for the first time.
i would like to seek some guidance or advice as to what best to do.
BTW, im posting this on behalf of my wife.

we recently went for our first consultation at RHW.
my wife and i met with a female consultant who gathered all our details and then spoke privately to my wife about personal things.

my wife has since told me what happened in the room after i left them to speak. they discussed issues such as mental health and abuse.
my wife feeling that past issues may cause her to have post-natal depression decided to open up to the female consultant. after pouring out her most hidden self the consultant said "so he cracked onto you did he?", "he didnt rape you then?" and giggled. my wife just cried, as she typed away.

i'm still in shock as i write this down. im not to sure what i hope to achieve for this but it seems just very unprofessional and no understanding of the situation at all.

confused and feeling helpless father to be.

welcome to BB Dylan - you've come to a great place for advice

firstly - congratulations on your bub! awesome news!!!

with regard to the consultant - i would personally be putting in a complaint to the hospital - there is NO way that this sort of thing should be happening! i don't know your wife's exact situation, and i don't want to pry at all - but ANYTHING that your partner considered traumatic - no matter the consultants personal opinion - should be shown the utmost respect by the consultant!

it is likely to be hard - and it may be easier for you to take what your wife has told you and lodge the complaint on her behalf - but i believe you seriously need to address this - if for no other reason than to give your wife back some power within herself with regard to the process. my guess is that, at the moment, she's feeling more than a little lost, and like things are outside of her control - making it known that you won't stand for that sort of behaviour may help her to regain that feeling of being in control of her self.

you're doing a great thing coming here to ask for advice Dylan - this is my opinion only, and you're sure to get other comments - take from them what is most suitable for yourself. your wife, and your situation, and i truly hope you get some sort of resolution soon

Good Luck

BG

Hey Dylan

I agree with BG...you should not just leave this alone, and as hard as it may be I do think that a complaint is certainly in order

xx yogababy

I would be making a complaint too - and to show you are serious, I would CC (and put the CC on the letter) to the health minister for a speedy and appropriate response.

thank you all for your advice and support.

this site is really good to seek information, even for dads. :)

Hi Dylan
Welcome to BB and congrats on your pregnancy.
I agree with all the others. You should make a complaint about this person.