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we have FINALLY decided on the boys names and have decided to keep it under wraps until they are born ... our decision right?? It seems quite a few people (mainly family) are quite offended by this decision and trying to make me feel bad because I won't tell them.
Has anyone else kept it a secret and how did you manage with these kinds of people?
Of course it is your decision! And don't let them bully you into telling them. If they had any respect for you at all then they would wait.
Just stick to your guns and tell them they have to wait or maybe throw them off the scent and give some fake names say something like or we are torn between this name and that name (make up some) and say you will make a definite decision once the babies are born
I would just say that you haven't decided yet and will make a decision when you see your babies. I would never tell anyone what the names are or that they had been decided.
We did not tell anyone either time!!
Your baby your decision, I must say friends who we knew sex and name before hand loose all excitment when they send birth announcment SMS as all we didnt know was date and time!!
Stick to your guns Good luck
We never told anyone the names we had pickd out, and if asked we just mentioned that theres an old wives tale about it being bad luck to tell people. Most people were happy with that, and if they werent we then told them we wanted the names to be a surprise for everyone, just like what the gender was. :)
I hear ya! We have had the same problem cause we know the sex of our little cupcake and no-one else does. Some people can't handle that.
We have just told people it's our decision and we really want something to tell people when this one is born, not just "well baby is here". That takes all the excitement out of it for DH and I.
:hug: hope they lay off soon!
When I had Moo we decided on his name very early on, no one found out until he was born. It was hard when I was still working as people would constantly bug me. Sometimes they'd guess it & I'd have to keep a straight face (which I find very difficult!) but I never slipped up.
My family didn't even ask so that was easy. The reason we didn't want to tell is that the name was highly emotive being my deceased father's name, it just made it that much more special when DS was finally born on his anniversary. We didn't want anyone saying anything negative about the name either, even though it's quite a normal name you never know! His name is Peter btw.
Pesonally I never ask those kind of questions. My best friend recently had a little girl, knew the sex & the name beforehand. She never divulged & I never asked her. I figured if she wanted me to know she would tell me herself :D
It's completely your decision, good luck!
It is totally your decision. Others really shouldn't be getting their knickers in a knot about it. They all made their own choices when they had their kids and this is your choice to make and they should respect that.
We found out the sex of our babies and decided to share that but decided to keep the names a secret until they were born so there was still an element of surprise for everyone come birth day. It also stopped other people giving their opinions of our names, once they knew it was too late they just had to grin and say "Oh what a lovely name". If people tried to get further information I just told them the types of names we liked or the ones we knew we wouldn't use. Maybe they are trying to get a feel for if you are going traditional or unique. However they should be able to tell that from your other kids names.
Your right to keep it a secret. Stay strong!
WHAT? They are your babies. I can't believe someone else would crack it or pressure you to tell them. :rolleyes: Just be upfront and say you are not telling anyone, and besides that you haven't decided yet.
When I was pregnant with ds we found out he was a boy and chose his name before he was born and told everyone so there was no suprises. I've already chosen names for my next kid coz I'm just that lame hahah but I refuse to tell my family and I said even when I do get pregnant I'm going to find out the sex and keep that secret as well as far as I'm concerned they can build a bridge its my decision :) don't let them get to you babes xx
We did that too, everyone knew everything else about the pregnancy and bub so we kept name choices to ourselves. Yeah it peeved a few ppl but there wasn't anything they could do about it! DH mum - for some random reason - was very upset about it coz she was convinced she was the only one we were keeping it from but other than that people just had to get over it, it was our choice and we didn't want their opinions of the names we had chosen coz it's your choice and you shouldn't have to consider other peoples opinions. For us it turned out we changed our mind when we saw DD but it didn't matter, No one knew any of the names we were considering. Don't cave in to them!!!
Thanks everyone, its more my sister than anyone else. She invited herself to DD2s birth and has demanded that she is notified as soon as i go into labour this time around so she can leave Geelong for Ballarat as soon as she gets notification and not to look after my other kids to be in at the birth again when she hasn't been invited!! It maybe hormones but she is annoying me to no end lately!
ETA- I think I'll be sending her a message the day after they are born lol
We still havent decided on a name yet until we see her. But both sides are convinced that we know but we arent saying anything. Just say you have a list but you havent decided :)
screw 'em! They are your babies.
Good work!:
We told people gender but names are for us. We don't really decide on one name anyway, but narrow it down to 2-3 before bubs is born. But these are kept top secret.
We knew with Peppars name we would get some lovers but loads of haters so we chose to keep it our secret. We both loved her name (obviously) and didnt want people bringing us down with their negative comments.
Only me and DH knew but my SIL used to drill the boys because she was sure that we had told them too.
Her nickname was Shaniqua so thats what we called her all the time, so much so some people even thought that was what we were going to name her :p
Its your baby, your choice so stuff them all I say.
I agree with everyone else, they're your babies, it's your choice what to tell! To be honest I think it's rude of them to get cranky about it, they don't have a 'right' to know.
We're finding it hard ourselves, we know the sex and name and aren't telling either. We haven't been getting entered though, it must be hard!
Nice work on the text the next day, you don't want anyone inviting themselves along to your birth, even if they are family
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OMG, people are giving you a hard time about keeping them secret :o How damn rude of them!!! We kept our final name choices to ourselves and no one was offended, at least not that I'm aware of. If anyone asked, I just said we were either still deciding and we would be keeping it a surprise.
We shared some of our favourites along the way but not the final choices.
Stand your ground hon, it's no one elses business unless you decided to tell them :hug:
We kept our DD1's name a secret until birth, we told everyone her gender but kept her name a secret, succesfully for over half of the pregnancy!
DD2's name we decided to share. Alot of people know what our boys name will be, we have had a couple of boys born into the family in the last couple of years and I let them know that we had chosen the name Mason and that it was imprortant to us, if someone had used it we would have used it anyway. So, if this baby is a boy everyone will know his name however if it is another girl I think I may keep it a secret ;) I would love to keep the gender a secret (from everyone else, not us) but I don't know that DH could go the distance :lol:.
I say, keep it a secret. It is lovely to have a suprise.
Urgh, you have my sympathy MrsS. My MIL thought it was her God given right to know the gender and the names...she would have bet her house we were keeping the gender from her on purpose (but we didn't even know). She also wanted naming rights...yeah sure.
With DS we did know but we certainly weren't letting on. She bunged it on again, and we fobbed her - again. She was ropeable when she found out that we did tell one person, and she told another (my uncle and godfather and her husband who sadly took that info to his grave not 24hours later). She wanted to know why she hadn't been important enough to tell....:rolleyes:
I can't believe people are giving you a hard time about keeping your names a secret.
I kept my names a secret both times. Names are hard enough to work out without having other peoples opinions play a role. With #2 We kept his gender a secret too.
Don't let it get to you. It's your choice. :hug:
thanks everyone it just amazed me how much people expect of someone elses pregnancy they have to know EVERYTHING!
pffft keep it a secret as long as you can my own SiL stole my name for a girl if my ds had of been a boy and just coincidentally her dd was born 3 weeks before ds and she tried to hide the name she chose as it was the name i was going to have..
we kept both the sex and the names a secret.
loads of people weren't happy, and we basically said that was too bad.
a simple thing I said to some particularly persistent people was that as I'd managed to keep the pregnancy a secret for 22 weeks (almost all of which I was violently ill with m/s) they could just zip it about the sex and the names, as I clearly wasn't going to budge, so they need not waste their time and energy ;)
GL!!!
omg my mother drove/drives me nuts asking what names we like/liked etc
We found out the sex when preg with DS and she started on it. I ended up saying we have a shortlist but want to see him first before naming him. The response was "what's on the list".
So i just told her bluntly we aren't telling anyone our name choices. She got huffy and wanted to know what... my answer shut her up .. "Because I don't want anyone else's opinion, it's mine and Dh's choice".
So that got around it for DS... now she's at it again "oh what names do you like". And again i just keep saying "i'm not telling you cos I don't want your opinion". That or I just "not sure, haven't gotten that far. will let you know when bubs arrives". Or when she does it in front of other people (to put me on the spot) i say "i told you already, we are not telling anyone". Or what about saying "unless you were there for conception, you don't get a say in the name... or a spot at the birth"
it really annoys me how some people think they have a right to know everything about the baby before the baby is born. Not only that, you'll probably swing between names before decising on one... we were deadset going with Andrew until a month before and Andrew didn't even make the shortlist we took to the hospital.
GL - sounds like you've got a pushy one on your hands. My sister told me she was sending me a list of names i wasn't allowed to use jic she had kids one day WTF?? I told her to send it, as I needed some suggestions and if i liked one, would take great pleasure in using it if I so wanted... list never arrived.
oh my sister did that too when we found out the twins were boys oh you cant use this name coz im having that when i have kids, i didnt even like the name so shes safe but i did tell her well im the one pregnant with boys, your not even pregnant so if we pick it, we pick it!
Yes right decision. If you tell people when you are pregnant people think they have a right to try to change the name you have chosen if it doesn't suit them or make negative comments. If you tell them after the baby is born people won't normally make negative comments or say they don't like the name.
When I was pregnant with DD my family believed you should never tell the names, incase the ultrasound was wrong about the sex!
We never found out that it was a girl anyway.
All I ever told my family was that the girls name was biblical (hannah), and the boys name is quite old (toby).
I did however say that we would be using our middle names for the bubs middle name.
So we got Hannah Marie, and if it was a boy it would have been Toby Leigh.
We have had the same problem int he past.
First there were the comments "oh you know the sex of the baby, thats sad, didn't you want a suprise?" to which I always reply ... it was a surprise we just got it early :rofl:
Then the names comments - man, you're dammed if you do and your damned if you don't.
I let DD name slip a few times to my bestie and Mum and I didn't talk at all through my pregnancy with her so there weren't the same dramas as we had with DDD.
We named DD what we orginally were going to call DDD (departed darling daughter). When we originally told my Mum that name she screwed her nose up and said "nah you're not really going to call her that, that's a horses name" ... she denies it of course but I was so gutted by her comment I have never forgot it. So because we went with a different name for DDD, we decided DD was always going to have her chosen name.
To avoid the few comments we did get I always said we couldn't decide on two names that were way off the mark anyway. I love false names ... that way if the offenders said "oh I don't like that name" it didn't matter because it was never going to be it :rofl:
ALSO its harder to say "I don't like that name" when they are looking upon the said baby in all their cuteness :D
So in all my waffling I would suggest a few false names just to "appease" people ...no you shouldn't have to do that BUT it WILL shut them up :rofl:
I love surprising people :D that's part of the fun for me!!
we didn't tell our famililies that we were pg until we were about 10 weeks, and we'd decided that if we were having twins, we were going to keep that as a surprise too (it was a significant possibility, as there's twins on both sides of our family...).
this is your baby, your special time, and you get to make the decisions in the way that you want.
:dance: