Strippers @ bucks nights

ok am i completly stupid or does anyone else think that it is ok.

this isnt about me it is a coming from a convo between dp, me, my bro and SIL

we were talkin about wat we will do for hens night seens i will be 6months preg and i said i didnt know and SIL was liek u have to do something memorable. then my bro was sayin to dp that the best man will go crazy and he will end up shaved and tied up in a bush somewhere. Sil was like aslong as there r no strippers or ur not going.

My point of veiw is that we r prob gonna end up with a stripper so y isnt it alright for girls to have one but not the guys. I dont see anything wrong with them looking atleast their not out fooling around.


Does anyone else see it this way or do u feel that if there was gonna be a stripper wouldnt let ur hubby go.

My DP prob wouldnt go anyway! he desnt like strippers. I honestly dont see the point of having them, there's much more fun things to do than see someone gyrating around, half naked makign a fool of themselves... but thats just my opinion.

Everyone is different.

I wouldnt want to go to a hens night with strippers nor would I want my DH to go to a bucks nor do I think he would want to go...think its terribly blerggh...Sorry.

Jo

I dont see the big deal with it I trust that DH will behave himself. Too be quite frank I dont think its really a hens or bucks night without a bit of a laugh watching stippers because lets face it, if us ladys are all sitting around watching stripper and we have had a few drinks then we would all be on the floor laughing at how funny the poor sod was who took of his clothes for us.

lol caro mine has asked before, lol!!

Yeah im sorry but I dont find the whole stripper thing amusing.. I wouldnt go to a hens if there was going to be a stripper and DH wouldnt go to a bucks if there was a stripper. I guess it each to their own though!

i really don't have a problem with dp going to strippers, in fact he went to some last saturday night. as long as he he absolutely open and honest about what's he's doing then i have no problem with 'boys being boys'. having said this, i did absolutely crack it one night when i was about 7 months pregnant and he rang me blind drunk cos he couldn't get a taxi and needed to be picked up at 1am after he'd been at a work party. anyway in the car on the way home he proceeded to tell me the story of how they'd hired a stripper to come to their work and she'd stuck a chupa chup...well, i think you can guess where....and then he'd pulled the chupa chup stick out with his teeth. i was not overly impressed with this and believe me he copped it for a few days afterwards, but i suppose at least he is completely honest with me and feels like he can tell me these sorts of things....and i know there is no way he would ever cheat or anything like that....anyway, the moral of the story is...i'm happy for my dp to do these sorts of things as long as nothing is done behind my back. if i ever found out something from someone else i would be livid, and he knows that's where we stand.

I will admitt I have been to a few Hens nights with strippers & yes my Sister got one for mine...but like someone else said we just laughed as we had all had a few drinks & the actions etc I find just sooo funny. But DH didn't have a stipper at his & he requested it be that way, he has been to the odd few that have strippers a few years back but now prob wouldn't bother. I know if a girl has it then why can't the guy & so on. But I honestly don't find anything funny about a female stripper, they go so much futher than the male strippers & depending what type you get some do "disgusting" things to say the least.

My hens night was dinner followed by a booze cruise stripper cruise so much fun!!!! I had 45 friends come some came to both some to just part of night was all there choice!!

DH bucks night golf at moonne links floowed by dinner and strip club!!!! he only had a few close friends invited didnt do the whole big thing maybe 8 of them.

I dont like the idea for my DP to watch a stripper. And i dont like the idea of watching one either...
Im glad my DP has the same opinions of strippers as i do.
And even if he didnt, i would have a majour problem with him wanting to watch one, or even doing it. Sure, i cant stop him, but i really wouldnt be happy about it, id almost be hurt!

I think my Df would go for a laugh and the beer, hes not so big on strippers.
Wouldn't bother me at all, they're just looking, as long as nothing else.

Personally for me I wouldn't even enjoy watching men strip doesn't do it for me, think I'd prefer go watch the woman and pick up some moves!

If that's what he wants, then why not. I don't see the problem with a one offthing for his last 'night of freedom' hehe! Ive actually never been to a stripper, and don't think I will, though I would if it was part of a hens night, it is just a laugh after all.

I don't have a problem with strippers but I still don't really see the point. It's an odd tradition. Anyway I definitely didn't want one at my buck's night but of course one was organised without my knowledge. She was foul - I'm sorry, but if you'd seen the things she did you would agree!

I don't think there's any harm in it as long as both parties are aware of what is happening and are OK with it.

Honestly I have no problem with my husband seeing strippers at a bucks night... I'm not his mother and don't need to tell him what is acceptable or not! I trust him 110% and I think women are naieve if they think their husbands don't look at other women in the passing. I'm not ashamed to admit I am an ex-stripper... Daniel, being a country bloke had never been to a strip club before until I asked him to come along one night - I asked him to tip the other girls, didn't bother me in the slightest because we are very comfortable with eachother... I suggested he take a couple of the other girls for a dance, but he declined - but if he had, that would have been Ok too! :) I think male strippers are hilarious... People need to not take themselves so seriously if you can't just let go and have a bit of a laugh.. But Scorpio Queen - I too would be livid if my husband was eating marshmallows off of the entertainers chest... I think that is unacceptable and I suppose I am fairly naieve about those goings on because I never experienced that sort of behaviour within the club environment along with vibrator shows? It's one thing to climb up and down a pole and it's another to perform a vibrator show!

ETA - Slyder... I too have heard some of the grotty things performed by 'private' entertainers... fortunately, I have never seen any of that in the club environment!

I have no problem with DF having a stripper - I'm happy for him just to have a best man and a bucks' night!

I think there's a difference between stripping and sex acts. I wouldn't mind my new partner (when i get one lol) seeing a stripper, but when she touches him, or he touches her in any way, that's not on. That's congruent with cheating. But still, there are far better things to do than have a stripper on a bucks/hens night. I think it'd be a huge laugh to have someone in a chicken suit, wearing sexy undies and clothes on top and have the giant chicken strip and dance. I have one strange imagination, but still, that'd be hilarious! Yeah, look but don't touch, but aren't we starting marriages off on the wrong foot by having another person make you feel sexy?

The stripp places my DH has been to for his bucks and other friends bucks nights are all look only and if people do touch they are kicked out!!!

The cruise i had was probably more in your face than what the guys went to!

A gf of mine just recently went to a b'day with her DH where a stripper was involved she did say it was a really eye opener she told me that the poor b'day boy was been whipped and he tought it was funny to start with but then when she didnt stop until the boys had to go and save him as he looked like he was ready to hit her ( not that he would ).

So when I say that its all a bit of fun I guess I am more for the clubs not the private shows where they can be xxx rated you dont need to see what she had for breaky for a good time and a laugh with your mates iykwim

I'd go to see a stripper with my partner so I'm not morally opposed to them. But I think the whole point of seeing a stranger naked is that it's meant to be erotic so I would want to share that experience with him. I can't really grasp the concept of it "being a laugh". Luckily I find myself quite hilarious - I don't need to see people's bits and bobs for an amusing night out.

No problem with strippers here. DH used to bounce at a strip club in his younger days before me, so has seen and done it all, as such is completely over it. As for the touching bit, wouldn't not be too happy, but would much rather he touch someone with whom he has no emotional attachment than someone he knows.

i don't have a problem with strippers for bucks nights and that kind of thing. I think it really depends on the person, I arranged for a stripper for a girlfriends hens night, and she loved it! SOme friends organisaed one for mine (my first wedding), and I was so embarrassed!! Not my kind of thing, but happy to watch it all happen for someone else!

I think that so long as everyone is being honest with their partners, it is all just a bit of fun really! I would be concerend though if my DH suddenly started going to strip clubs regularly, but he doesn't do that.

Caro, I don't mean to judge, but I don't think many of us put an opinion with regards to the food off the stripper. I'm sure we all wouldn't like our partners to eat off another woman's body. They should be eating off us! I'm of the look but don't touch policy.

yeah i dont mind the just looking part but when it comes to sticking things places then it is a bit full on.
i trust dp and i know he wouldnt do anything.
thanks for all your thoughts on the topic

I don't have an issue with the stripper thing either.

I'd like to think that DH & I are in a good enough place in our relationship that it just isn't an issue.
Its a little bit like porn, etc - to think that they don't go there is a little naive - Guys are guys, and genetically - I think thats just how they're made up! ;)

Its all in a little fun, as well, because its not reality, so whatever :)

I also think that ultimately, if your man is inclined to cheat, then I don't think avoiding places and situations like that will deter him - He will either do it, or he won't.

I don't have a problem with my DH being in situations with strippers - If he was to cheat, I figure I would rather it happen so I could deal with it, leave him, and not waste any more of my life being with a man that wasn't 100% committed to me and our relationship. (Better I find out sooner rather than later ;))

I also believe that respect & trust is the building frame in any relationship - To ask him not to go, or make a fuss over him going, or simply not allowing him to go would be total disrespect to him - Almost telling him that I didn't trust him or his intention to us.

He recently went to a strip club on a bucks night where all of the men made a pact that they wouldn't tell anyone - so as none of their partners would find out.
He laughed at them all and told them they were being ridicuous - And they were floored when he told them that he would tell me, and that I would be fine...
DH told them that it was stupid to think that I wouldn't expect them to have strippers as part of a bucks night...

Just my opinion :D

You cant stop what the guys plan for him - even if they promise to abide by your wishes. Its his last night of "freedom" as they see it. They just wanna have some fun.
If he is marrying you there has to be a reason, right! Hes not marrying a stripper. He might go and get his appetite started somewhere else, but he willl come home to eat his pie! and its not like he does it every weekend, its his bucks and has to do the "male ****y thing"..... hope you all know what i mean by that!!!! Dont let the guys think he is "pussy whipped" (dont mean to offend, its just what they call it)..... otherwise the guys will see you as the baddy, forever!!!

and if you want a stripper, same as above!

CARO! I think that is just a given any woman would be irrate over an incident as such... I myself just didn't see this other post you mentioned. ;) Clearly touching is not on...

Caro - I have been payed to travel to clubs all over Australia, even Perth (If I remember correctly that is where you are from). I have never seen any of that seedy stuff in the clubs I have worked in and if any dancer demonstrated that sort of behaviour they would be escorted from the club immediately. The girls in Perth were telling me that there were plenty of nasty clubs in Perth, but can honestly say I never needed to be crude or dirty as you say to make the cash. It is indeed a very competitive industry, but I refuse to believe or agree that the majority of the industry is corrupt. I won't deny that I absolutely loved dancing, getting paid to work-out on the pole... After awhile I became so efficient on the pole that I didn't even need to work out at the gym to maintain myself. Of course there were ridiculous and obserred offers made on behalf of the gentleman or not so gentleman - but I think that's just men testing their boundaries. I have never known any girls to take up any of those offers! I have seen a few trashy feral girls asked not to come back. It’s the girls like that, that gives the rest of us the bad reputation.

Catherine, It is great to get a perspective from someone who has worked in the industry!

Personally I have no problem with it whatsoever. DH went to the strippers for his bucks and told me in detail all about it. He has also been for other peoples' bucks, and again will tell me all about it, as he does about any night out.

I am not interested whatsoever in seeing men strip, and i have only ever been once. I didn't go for my hens. I am with Shell, I would much rather watch women strip! :P

Strippers in clubs are often different to those you can hire to come to your place & yes I have seen & heard of some disgusting things from private stippers. But then what one person thinks is disgusting another may not.

In regards to cheating, I wouldn't not want my DH to go because I think he will cheat. That's just silly. He would never cheat & going to a strip club doesn't equal cheating. I simply don't like what some of the strippers do. Though I would never tell DH what he can & can't do & he wouldn't me either. Some things are just a simple understanding that you know how the other feels about it & you make your decision from there.

:

---

I think my Df would go for a laugh and the beer, hes not so big on strippers.
Wouldn't bother me at all, they're just looking, as long as nothing else.

Personally for me I wouldn't even enjoy watching men strip doesn't do it for me, think I'd prefer go watch the woman and pick up some moves!

---

Same here Shell :)

caro - it was me who posted about the chupa chup thing and believe me i was not impressed by it at all. we had a massive fight about it as i felt like he had crossed the line and gone too far. i am a pretty reasonable and tolerant person but this made my blood boil. especially as i was sitting at home 7 months pg not feeling too sexually attractive iykwim? in his defence, the story is that he was sitting on a chair drinking a beer wayching the show when she inserted the chupa chup in her and then proceeded to do a backflip onto him, knocked his beer all over him (i then had to wash his beer covered shirt grrr) and landed with the chupa chup basically right in his face so he was left with not much of a choice but to bite the stick out with his mouth simply so she could move on with her 'show' and get off him. it's all part of the act apparantly and very dirty. let me just say that he wasn't proud about doing it..and when he told me about it it was more he was just telling me matter of factly this is how it happened iykwim? anyway, i was glad he told me and was 100% honest with me about it. i agree it is very sleazy and dirty though and my dp is a very honest and loyal bloke. he's not a sleazebag at all and has never given me any reason not to trust him ever.
talking about dirty shows though, my ex once had a work xmas party where they had two female strippers come and dress up in school uniforms and perform a live sex act in front of them all. nice hey??

they're electricians....the boss organised it for them and they thought it was great...

Caro - Indeed it is an artform.. It is one thing to throw your panties off and flash your box and another to have the strength to manouver on a pole to show how beautiful the woman's body is. It's quite challenging getting up there and being watched and judged. Most of the time I would forget about who was watching because working the pole is very challenging! I have fallen on my head a few times..

Megiemoppit - I agree, I would much rather a woman than a bloke... Woman have such beautiful bodies whereas I don't find male strippers sexy at all... Just funny! I remember one we had for a gf's 30th - God he was a cracker... short little fellow and had the birthday girl hit his butt with a paddle - his bum was so red and then he started squirting baby oil all over himself! So far from sexy, but god it made us all laugh!

Strippers have such a bad reputation, but in all honesty, most of my regular clients would come in and book me just to chat about general random conversation. Many of them were married - but I don't feel as though I did anything to disrespect their wives. I remember one client would come in and pay quite a bit of cash for me to wear red toe nail polish and to give me a foot massage (fully clothed mind you) - he had a foot fetish but his wife didn't know... There were some strange clients but most of them were really normal guys and were very respectful. Lots of funny memories... I don't regret any of it!

Sorry to get a bit off topic. :)

ETA - I go off to feed Rochelle and come back to more posts! Gracie, that is feral - both things in your post. Was this a club or private entertainer? Even private functions in clubs I have worked in have never allowed anything like that. Everything is video taped and they are constantly audited. I've never even seen sex acts performed in a club. Most states dancers aren't even allowed to have their hands 30cms of their vajayjays. The only special show's i remember we're themed shows... The one I performed most was in firefighter overalls and fire tricks with flavoured kero - nothing to do with my hooha and nothing really obsene about it. Shame that's what some girls have to resort to... but obviously there is a demand for that sort of thing? Maybe they have to resort to that sort of thing because they aren't very skilled in other areas such as club and pole work.

DH and I didn't have strippers at our bucks or hens nights. My friends kept threatening that they would get me one and I was so worried. I think I would have cried if one had turned up and I certainly wouldn't have stuck around to see it! lol. It would have just made me feel extremely uncomfortable. Luckily DH shares my views and didn't want one either. For me, anything 'sexual' should be between partners, not with some random stranger. So even watching someone dancing around naked feels wrong to me. For us 'sexual stuff' is something personal and something I only want to share with DH not a stripper and a room full of ppl!! lol.
I also don't get celebrating getting married with seeing someone else dance around naked, and I too have heard feral stories. One of my friends was at a party and a stripper came and she put some beads up her bum and the guy pulled them out with his teeth, eww....

Catherine- no neither of these incidents were at clubs- the one with the two girls having sex was at a private residence and was all pre booked and planned for them to come that day (it was at 11am weird hey?). the other one (chupa chup) was called out to their factory on a friday arvo.

I'd have been really hurt if DH had a stripper at his bucks. Fortunately he and I both think the private strippers are tacky (from our limited experience... Mine was only once, and even then I walked out.)
Sorry - I'll admit, I have self-esteem issues and at times really hate my body. But even 'tasteful' pole dancing gets my back up because it is promoting one type of body as being beautiful. (This is an assumption of mine, going from TV shows etc - I have never seen a stripper with cellulite.)

I don't have a problem with strippers, but I don't like them at bucks/ hens nights, I just can't see the logic in saying I'm willing to make a life long commitment to you darling, by the way I just fondled/ oogled another woman preforming sex acts.

That's just dirty Gracie, If I knew that feral I would have slapped her! YUCK!

Snacks - In not one of the clubs I have worked in has there ever been just one typical body type. Clubs cater for men and men like variety and have different tastes. One girl I worked with in Brisbane was a bigger girl and she was a great earner - It has alot to do with attitude and how your able to work the club with personality. I think women are their own worst crytics. I remember one girl, was an absolute jealous biatch (sorry that's irrelevant) not stick thin and not large, but she had celulite on her bum and legs. When she wasn't being a tarty mole on drugs she used to make money... but one night there were a few blokes with a lady. The lady was blind and was commenting very loudly about the girls on stage. She was saying really rude things about the girl with celulite. Obviously this girl heard this woman and started crying on stage - If you leave the stage before your time is up you get fined. So she called me over and begged me to replace her and even tried to bribe me. I was happy to take the stage without bribary and I did feel for her... Soon as I got up the lady was trying to have a go at the other girl with me, I turned around and said politely, "Isn't society a funny place? Men seem to love women in all shapes and sizes"... It's also funny because the male friends she was with were telling her to shut up and said they didn't think there was anything wrong with the other girl. High earners come in all shapes and sizes, as I said, in my experience it has alot to do with the way you carry yourself, attitude etc. Amy, I'm sure you know your a fine specimen- I think it's more attitude that men find sexy.

Happy to be wrong, Catherine... I shouldn't be surprised that things are different IRL to how they are portrayed by Hollywood :rolleyes:

I didn't have a stripper for my hens night. I really didn't have a night. We had a girls outting - I was 4.5mths pg and we went bowling ! Sounds cheesy and not really a way to spend something like that, but we had a ball!

DH's bucks night - he went to a strip club. I knew. It was fine. In the end, if he comes home to me and has done anything wrong, what does it matter?

He got home, and I asked was it a good night... Just answer the question - it was his bucks night and didn't need to share. He was so excited about how it all went, that he told me everything anyways!

It's only one night. You trust him enough to marry him, why not let him?

Good luck with everything!