DS can be a bit like this. He easily feels defensive around toys he likes, although it is usually only a problem wiht kids he doesn't know - he is fine at mums group. I jump in right from the beginning to involve the other kids to help set up a game. He then seems to take the lead from me. I am going with the whole 'lead by example' tactic and hope it helps him learn those skills as he gets a bit older. It seems to be helping.