Really confused - never know which choice to make

[MotherM]

Thanks so much for the replies I got. Felt to personal to leave up, forgive me!

[lady_neon]

Hi MotherM, not sure whether you are after advice or just an ear.. sounds like you are very confused. Perhaps the two of you should see a relationship counselor?

[Gigi]

i agree with Lady Neon. Everyone has their dealbreaker. You are entitled to yours (no-one hurts your son). If your husband is depressed and is not getting help for that, that is another major issue too.

[MotherM]

Thank you. Yes, I'm confused.
Not sure whether to leave and start fresh but don't want to keep going through relationships as I mentioned above, stigma etc.

He said "Its hard being looked upon as a father figure and not being able or capable of parenting" <--- that's about the true-est (!!) words I've heard lately

We had one counselling session, on wait list. Just don't know whether it's worth bothering!!

[bubno.3]

is he violent with you behind closed doors as well?

[MotherM]

No - never.

[Catastrophic]

I understand the "no touching" your child thing. I'm a mother I get it... But I get the feeling, that the problems is a little bit of your controlling issues? especially with your latest comment " "Its hard being looked upon as a father figure and not being able or capable of parenting" <--- that's about the true-est (!!) words I've heard lately "... I've been a step parent - and had a few arguments with both the mother and my partner about parenting. it wasn't until we all sat down and discussed what we all expected that it got easier.

I would suggest some counselling, it sounds from what you have said the relationship is good in other ways.... Maybe getting together with a counsellor will be able to bring a few more things to the surface.

[Catastrophic]

I understand the "no touching" your child thing. I'm a mother I get it... But I get the feeling, that the problems is a little bit of your controlling issues? especially with your latest comment " "Its hard being looked upon as a father figure and not being able or capable of parenting" <--- that's about the true-est (!!) words I've heard lately "... I've been a step parent - and had a few arguments with both the mother and my partner about parenting. it wasn't until we all sat down and discussed what we all expected that it got easier.

I would suggest some counselling, it sounds from what you have said the relationship is good in other ways.... Maybe getting together with a counsellor will be able to bring a few more things to the surface.

[Footsteps]

Not sure what exactly was posted but huge hugs x