Hi Everyone,

After meeting with my midwife for vbac discussion for the 2nd time I am having a horrific time trying to make the desicion. (Im due mid September 09)

My daughter was born via emergency c-section in 2006. She was prosterior at 10 days overdue. I was fully dialated by the 3rd hour after which she turned and I got to attempt pushing only to be told she was obsrtucted and a c-section was the only safe option (at the 12 hour mark).

I was diagnosed with manic depression post birth, had a hard time bonding with my daughter and only managed to breast-feed for 3 months - which I was very down about.

My main concerns, apart from the obvious, are:

1. I am petrified of labour - I know, it might sound silly but I remember the pain (I've been told the prosterior is worse) was horrible, I still feel sick when I think of it.

2. I am very worried about mentally preparing myself and facing my fears of labor and vbac - only to have a repeat emergency c-section and feeling like a failure afterwards - I dont want to risk the depression making a repeat appearance.

Ofcourse, there are many reasons to have a vbac - and all of them are attractive to me. I just don't know if I have the guts to do it. I'm meeting with the midwife again in 4 weeks to discuss it further (for a third time). She suggested booking a c-section in at 40 plus weeks and cancelling if I feel like trying a vbac. I personally feel like I need to make a decision and work towards it, not wing it at the end.

I would really love to hear from anyone on their vbac experiences, both successful and not - and if anybody knows of anything I can do to help me with this decision, apart from reading everything I can find.

Is there anybody else struggling with this decision?? Are their any support groups or groups of women doing this together?

Thanks in advance,
Laura xx