She's all done- cold turkey, tiny bit sad :-( (sorry long)

[Softy]

Hi'ya,

Just wanted to get 'off my chest' how I've been feeling for last few days. Was bfeeding happily - was getting a little bit sick of it I have to admit as she was feeding very regular-every hour, and wasn't taking too well to solids. Then I started feeling guilty about being a little over it and was happy to keep going as I'd read heaps of posts from others about bfeeding and made me think how lucky I am to do it.

Then all of a sudden she got a horrible virus a few days short of 13 months and BAM that was it she had a 3 min feed one morning at 8.30am on one side only and that was it!! She's been cold turkey so to speak since then and I can't feed her enough solids!! But now I am a little bit sad that the journey is over as she doesn't feel like my little 'baby' anymore.

Have spoken to lots of people and all say similar thing that she has weaned herself. That's fine but I was expecting a slow down/reduction of feeds not just 'that's it thanks mum!' So now am expressing twice a day and still giving it to her on cereal, have still been offering her boob but not interested at all and it's been 1 1/2 weeks now. Now I have to look up the thread on toddler food for more variety as she's going mad on solids!! Eating blooming heaps!!! 1 1/2 w/bix in morning + 1/2-full banana then snacks-crackers or strawberries/fruit, then lunch which yesterday was 2 x egg yolks and 1 1/2 pieces of toast, then nap-(thank god so I can clean up and get ready for dinner), snack on mandarin before dinner which was about 3/4 cup of beef & veg with lots cheese + 1 x tub yoghurt!!!! Is there such a thing as feeding them too much??? I just keep feeding her till she won't open her mouth anymore...I figure she'll let me know??

[onthefly]

Ah, that's sad for you. But also a very proud time now that's she's eating 'big-girl' foods! It's really wonderful too that she ended things on her terms (and she's still getting bm on her cereal anyway, right?), though perhaps a mutually acceptable compromise might have been nicer.
Yep, she won't overeat, so just keep feeding her till she doesn't want it any more. I think they often up the food intake around that age too.
All the best

[MantaRay]

Softy. It really is bittersweet when they self-wean. It gets easier over time as you get used to the new phase of your mother-child relationship. Good on you for over a year of bfing!

[Softy]

You're right it is bittersweet!! Am still not sure whether to be happy or sad?? Am still expressing twice a day so she's getting that on her cereal or milo!!

I know milo Been trying plain milk and mixing with EBM and water but she just wasn't drinking enough and I'd have to hold her and cuddle every time she had poo's!!! Now she's eating flat out that's been a couple times a day!! So I made a strawberry milkshake-wasn't that into it then mixed in a tiny bit of milo and voila!! Is now drinking a lot more milk and not so much poo troubles....still whinging but nowhere near as much. So for everyone out there milo does do the trick when you're out of options on how to get more liquids into them!!

I am happy that she ended the bf on her terms but wasn't ready for it myself so still coming to terms with the next phase...you're right Mantaray!! We still co-sleep so still get lots of cuddles but not sure about pushing her into her cot now...I'll miss her now she's a 'big girl'

[S B]

I completely understand why you feel sad. Although it can be time consuming (my son fed every2-3 hours as a newborn and was still having 4 feeds a day when he turned one year old) it is such a nice way to spend special time with your baby and to be able to give them something that absolutely no one else can provide for them makes you feel so loved and needed and important. I have my son down to one feed a day, he is 15 months and I dread the day I give him his last feed. I have been told that some poeple almost go through a grieving process and that they mourn the loss they feel. Find a friend who understands how you feel and borrow their shoulder to cry on. Best of luck to you and your bub!!

[sunshine_sieben]

Oh, I so understand how you feel. I was fortunate enough to be feeding my DD for 19 months (never planned on being one of those "Hippie-freaks" who feed beyond 12 months - well, that's what I thought before I had DD). At about from about 12 months she only had 4 feeds a day (first thing in the morning, before her day nap, before bed time and 1-2 overnight feeds. She also had some cow's milk. By 18 months she had replaced all but one overnight feed with milk (she asked for milk, was not interested in the bottle. I then started to think about how to stop the overnight feed (felt like I was left with the least desirable feed, in the middle of the night). But when she started asking for water instead when waking at night, I was sad. I started to actively offer the breast (something I hadn't done in months), but she just wasn't interested. I was about 3 or 4 months pregnant, so my milk had probably dried up.
Although I was glad that she had stopped BFing on her terms, I was so sad not to have this lovely tender bonding time with her anymore.
But you know what, you will both adjust and find different ways to bond.

Lots of hugs!
Sasa