Sleep just a little PLEASE!!!! vent

[julie_ann_jules]

hi everyone
I know that sleepless nights go with having a baby BUT DS is now 5months old and still feeds every 2-3 hrs during the night. He usually go's to bed at 6pm (we struggle to keep him awake after that) he then wakes for a feed at 9pm,12am,2am,4am,6am,7.30am then we start the day and he feeds 2.5-3 hourly during the day.
I also have a 6 year old boy (at school) and a VERY active 4 year old who does to kinder 3 time a week (9am-12) but is home the rest of the time. I am just soooooooooooo exhausted. Today I just want to cry. I'm not depressed I am just so exhausted that I don't know what to do with myself. I'm not keeping up with the housework and feel like I'm always rushing to try and get on top of things.
DH was home yesterday and when my baby went down for his afternoon sleep he also had a sleep leaving me up with my 4yo!!!!!! Then he had the nerve to tell me to come to bed and have a sleep with him???? WHAT???? How can I leave a 4yo in the house unsupervised while I have a sleep??? That is just not an option! I am sooooo ****ed off at DH! Sooooo upset! Grrrrrrrrr
I don't know why DS isn't sleeping! I don't know what I'm doing wrong! I just wish he'd sleep longer. Even 4-5hrs straight would be great!

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

One of the girls at my MG has a 9mth old and he has only JUST started only waking once a night, before that was every couple of hours.

Do you use a dummy? Would it help if you give the dummy and try and resettle without a feed? Maybe once DS has the hang of the fact he might not be so hungry her might go say 4-5hrs for you instead?

I hope he starts sleeping a little better for you and about DH i know what you mean, my DP gets 1 day off a week so he sleeps til like 11, he says why don't you stay in bed with me for a bit.. your kidding right keep a 10mth old occupied in our room ALL morning.. pffft not relaxing at all.

[boomba]

I dont really have nay advice just lots of sleeping vibes for you and bubs! Myabe tell your DH when he is home its his job to wtach the kids so YOU can sleep!

good luck xxxxx

[Arcadia]

Oh hun...hugs to you.

You're not doing anything wrong. You're caring for your bubba in a beautiful way by meeting his every need.

It is NORMAL for babies to wake through the night. How often they wake depends on the bub.

One thing that helped me was to try and stretch out the daytime feeds (if you can) in the hope it will stretch out the night-time ones too.

It sounds like you need a break. Over the weekend if DH is home, can you express enough for one night and get DH to get up to him, and then let DH sleep the next day?? So you both get some rest?

GL!!!

[Daydream Believer]

Hugs hun, I dont have any advice for you but I hope someone does

[MummyNaomi]

HUGS Hun, I feel your pain, its VERY hard to function when you are sleep deprived, you are not alone and it sounds like you are doing a fabulous job with your three children (I struggle with ONE!!). You are definately NOT doing anything wrong, every baby is different!! Most parents that have babies that sleep through the night have one thing in common only - LUCK!!

My 16 week old is similar - he goes to sleep about 6-7 (I cant keep him awake any later) and he feeds 3 hourly through the night except I am lucky enough that he has dropped the 9pm-ish feed about a month ago.

Last night when he woke for one of the feeds (3am) I actually decided to try to get him back to sleep without a feed and just used the dummy and settling techniques - it actually worked much to my surprise!!! (took about 25 mins but he then slept through to the next feed). I am going to try this for the next few nights to see if I can 'wean' him off one of the feeds. He is still getting plenty of food as I feed regularly during the day and at 6pmish, 12pmish and then about 5amish so I'm figuring that even dropping ONE feed will give me some more uninterrupted sleep which makes for a happier refreshed Mummy (and therefore a more content bubs!!)

Hang in there - perhaps let DH know you need some help and tell him exactly what you need him to do (eg look after the 4yo so you can nap), sometimes the DHs just dont comprehend how tough it is for a sleep deprived Mummy

Sending Sleep vibes your way

HTH

Naomi
x

[julie_ann_jules]

Thanks everyone for your encouragment and support
I had a little "mini meltdown" yesterday (I simply couldn't function as I was sooooooo tired) DH stayed home for the morning and I went back to bed! I got an extra 2hrs sleep and I feel so much better now!

[BekZ]

All I can say is hugs sweety. I could have written your post myself atm. Although my bub is only 5weeks old and I have lost the plot

[MummyNaomi]

Glad to hear you are feeling better and got some sleep - we all have 'Mummy Meltdowns' at one time or another

[BrightSparkles]

Sending you good sleep vibes.
GL
xx

[AliBaby]

Maybe its a normal 5mth thing as I am going through wha tyou are at the moment although it is just starting to iprove from over 7 feeds a night down to 5 feeds a night (I'll tak any improvement I can). Just hoping it is a phase.

to you. It must be extremely hard with a 4yr ol and 6yr old as well.

[MantaRay]

That sounds so tiring! I'm glad that you got a sleep in!

Many mums find that their babies wake that often at that age - has he always done that? Sometimes babies just still need frequent feeds but at that age it can also be due to a burst in development - maybe getting ready to crawl or something else. Generally it passes before too long, but in the meantime some things that work for other mums are trying to feed more often during the day, giving the baby a dream feed, and co-sleeping.

Hang in there hun and I hope it gets better soon. FWIW, the babies that wake frequently in the first months, seem to turn into the best sleepers later on!

[julie_ann_jules]

funny thing is he was sleeping 8-9 hrs at 10 weeks then at 14 weeks he went back to waking 2-3hrly and has done that ever since..... so its frustrating knowing that he "can" sleep those longer hours

[MantaRay]

It is frustrating when they wake more often! My first DS was the same - he was sleeping through by 6 weeks but it went downhill at about 6 months!!

It sounds like it's related to his neurological development and perhaps heading towards a milestone. One thing that I found was that when they were learning a new skill such as crawling or standing, instead of settling themselves back to sleep when they stirred, they would wake up fully and practise. This is normal but it does pass. Is there any way you can grab a nap during the day?

[Visitor8]

Ashton is 11 months old, and he only JUST started sleeping through the night a couple of weeks ago. Before that he was 2 hourly all night and 3 hourly all day so I totally know how your feeling. I also have a 4 year old and a 5 year old and it can get really exhausting. I don't have a partner helping, so I can't give advice on your DH except I would probably be just as ****ed as you. Lucky for me my boys are able to be left up while I sleep so I would often nap with Ashton in the afternoon for a couple of hours while the boys watched a dvd or played with their toys. I think this really helped me get through the early months.

Some things that really worked here were co sleeping, that way I can just put Ash on the boob and go back to sleep. I hardly woke.
Don't look at the clock. If your looking at the time constantly then your thinking about the sleep your missing out on.
Carrying him in a mei tai on my back. He would sleep well in that, left me hands to catch up with housework and play with the other boys.
Get out of the house as much as possible. We do playgroups and kindagym etc. We are out every day, sometimes all day. This makes the day go faster, and the 4 year old is entertained and also Ash has started to really enjoy it

Also remember that it is very normal for babies under 12 months to feed 2-3 hourly 24 hours a day. Breastmilk is absorbed very very well and they need that food to grow and develop.

Your doing a great job!

[Daydream Believer]

Also remember that it is very normal for babies under 12 months to feed 2-3 hourly 24 hours a day. Breastmilk is absorbed very very well and they need that food to grow and develop.

Can I say thank you for posting that, DD is 1 & wakes a min of 4 times a night & feeds back to sleep & I dont think anyone has said that before, makes me feel better