Co-sleeping the second time around

[sunshine_sieben]

I co-slept with DD full time until she was 6 months, then for the second half of the night until she was aound 1.

I love co-sleeping, cause I'm essentially a very lazy person and hate getting up in the middle of the night. so I'm co-sleeping with DS now. DD comes into my bed in the morning for a cuddle. So far I have seen no obvious signs that she's jealous that he's allowed to sleep with us and she's not. But I don't know what to look out for as a sign, either.
She does definitely get jealous at other times. But so far she hasnt taken it out on him. She adores him. She wants my attention, but she doesn't get angry at him for taking up my time.

How do others deal with this?

Sasa

[Barb Glare]

Hi,

I think you are dealing with it perfectly. She comes in for a cuddle - she loves her new brother. She wants your attention - well of course. Why would she be jealous beyond what is normal for her age with a new baby in the house? Sounds like she's a happy and well adjusted little girl - well done.

[sunshine_sieben]

Sounds like she's a happy and well adjusted little girl - well done.

You should be here during witching hour - not so well adjusted then

Thanks for your encouragement, Barb.
I guess I have just heard so many stories about siblings resenting the new addition and often not showing it in the beginning. Actually, a friend of mine got told to wean her 6 month old because her older boy was too jealous as he hadn't been BF. Total nonsense, of course.
I have had so many people ask about her being jealous when telling them that we co-sleep with DS. It just made me question myself.

It is rather lovely when she comes in in the morning and gives all 3 of us a kiss... or when she tries to BF him or when she orders me to pick him up cause he's crying. Less lovely when she tries to pick him up herself... I don't know whether I should admit this, but the other day I was with a delivery lady at the door when he started crying. He was sleeping on my bed. When I went to check on him, DD was coming towards me while carrying him!!! I almost had a heart attack. No idea how she got him off the bed. She was holding him under his arm pits with her arms around his chest and him facing away from her. And he smiled at me. Soooo surreal and sooo scary. I was only 2 minutes...

sometimes she shows obvious signs of being jealous. Like screaming for a hug when I BF him or not wanting him on HER change table. If other people (usually childless ones) witness that, they seem quite horrified and exclaim: "oh my god, she's jealous" Well, of course she is. I think that is compleltely normal - to an extent.
at other times, she wants him to have a bath with her, she wants to hug him, she doesn't want to go to bed without kissing him goodnight, she wants him to sleep in her bed, so she can "read" him a goodnight story...
and then she has a meltdown, cause grandma is holding him, when it is HER grandma....
It's a rollercoaster of emotions for her...

Sasa